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Author Topic: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O  (Read 14959533 times)

UXLZ

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77340 on: May 24, 2015, 02:39:51 am »

Probably the most annoying example was a guy who tried to have a half-storm giant/half-cloud giant/half fire-giant (all homebrewed templates with no LA, although he claimed they were official) fighter with a +5 greatsword at level 1 - in a world where there's no such thing as giants to boot. He got banned for something before I got the chance to tell him he wasn't allowed in the game.

In dodgy rules interpretations, I had one player try to use Mirror Image and Daylight to instagib a 20th level vampire.

The Giant dude seems to sound like he was trying to play as Ichigo. Half-everything. I wouldn't really call that 'sneaking' past you though, more so 'trying to barge.' No sane person would ever let someone play a character like that, or even let a character like that exist.

How would that work? Have Mirror Image multiply the power of Daylight or something? Still, at least dodgy rules interpretation isn't outright bullshit like Flyme's problem player.

@Flyme: Convince the DM to repeatedly send monsters against you that are immune to the munchkin's main damage type?
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Neonivek

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77341 on: May 24, 2015, 02:41:32 am »

Multi-classing cleric/rogue. No idea why. Probably up to something. Or it's for a prestige class.

I sure as hell hope he isn't unchained.

He's been multi-classing rogue a bit lately. Sneak attacking on magic attacks is bullshit. And shouldn't even work, aside from on rays.

There is a prestige class that actually lets you do it for spells that aren't rays.

The Arcane Trickster.

You can sneak attack with any spell that allows for a critical so... yes... Inflict Wounds (the touch version) does count for it.
« Last Edit: May 24, 2015, 02:49:22 am by Neonivek »
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wierd

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77342 on: May 24, 2015, 03:16:26 am »

*imagines how this would go down...

Cleric/Rogue extends hands with a calm, priestly demeanor toward his victim.

"Bless you my child..."

The mark twists in astonished agony and terror, as critical damage inflict wounds on touch takes effect completely by surprise. Reaches hands to face reflexively as boils and lesions open up spontaneously on his cheeks and forehead.

Cleric/rogue casually dips hands into mark's pockets, rifles around a bit, and deftly retrieves their valuables, leaving them in stark terror and agony on the floor.

"Thank you for your generous donation!"


-- in all seriousness though, inflict wounds is a negative energy cleric spell. If he is positive aligned, he shouldnt be able to cast this regularly, if at all.  He would have to be an evil cleric to use it regularly.
« Last Edit: May 24, 2015, 03:21:24 am by wierd »
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Rolan7

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77343 on: May 24, 2015, 03:26:48 am »

Under 3.5e, inflict wounds isn't evil.  Good clerics can't cast it *spontaneously*, and neutral ones have to choose between negative or positive spontaneous casting.
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Neonivek

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77344 on: May 24, 2015, 03:34:56 am »

Under 3.5e, inflict wounds isn't evil.  Good clerics can't cast it *spontaneously*, and neutral ones have to choose between negative or positive spontaneous casting.

If there is one thing that always kind of annoyed me about dungeons and dragons is how often it boiled down to the idea of "good" as "goody goody" even when they share universes with Odin, Thor, Osiris, Ra, and Zues... who are still good Deities but you wonder why they don't just smite someone.

Then again this is the same game that made Hades evil... AGAIN!...

It is like Dungeons and Dragons is a Christian game... rather then a game with mythology.

It is why I always wanted to see a Divine Caster class that just specialized in flat out raining death down. Even Evil Clerics can be rather limited in their offensive magics to an extent (there are obvious and deadly exceptions)

Heck sometimes I think they kind of mess over evil deities by limiting their concepts to just being "fiendishly evil" to the point where they make absolutely no sense (Once again... Christian Influence) instead of say... A evil deity who is evil to everyone else except their followers.

But no... ALL evil deities seem to have absolutely no reason to ever worship them because they never EVER offer you anything other then divine spells... it just goes "Yeah we are both evil! Friendzies!" and the god goes "yeah but I am totally torturing you for eternity after"... Even Lovecraft did better then that.

Mind you... It isn't exactly a problem. Mostly this stems from the "Cartoony" settings with big bright heroes and black brimstone evil such as Forgotten Realms.
« Last Edit: May 24, 2015, 03:45:49 am by Neonivek »
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Grim Portent

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77345 on: May 24, 2015, 03:46:19 am »

Tiamat's not bad as evil gods go provided you're a chromatic dragon or chromatic dragon related.
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wierd

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77346 on: May 24, 2015, 03:58:27 am »

You know, some evil part of me wants to make something HORRIBLE now.

A ruleset for a "Priest of YHWH", featuring calling down fire and brimstone, unleashing deadly plagues, cursing with hemorrhoids (IT was TOTALLY a thing in the old testament! I can cite references!) and xenocide against non-believers. Such priests are religiously bound to denounce homosexuality, infidelity, idolatry, religiously enforce sexism, and to ALWAYS respect local government/tyrants as being agents of their god. (Meaning, they should not only get bitchy about temples to false gods when they encounter them, they would be REQUIRED to attempt to physically destroy said temples when they see them.)

Naturally, he's a "Good aligned" god. ;)

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Loud Whispers

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77347 on: May 24, 2015, 04:01:25 am »

Ahem, they will not always respect local/government tyrants. Only ones that respect G-d's chosen, or they get blasted by 10 billion plagues all over their pyramids. High level priests should be able to cast epic genocidal spells "kill all firstborns!"

Neonivek

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77348 on: May 24, 2015, 04:02:08 am »

Ohh the list of magical plagues God created in the bible is rather sizable...

Other feats include
-Turning someone into salt
-Giving someone super strength so they can collapse a building
-Flooding the entire world as a do-over

Ahem, they will not always respect local/government tyrants. Only ones that respect G-d's chosen, or they get blasted by 10 billion plagues all over their pyramids. High level priests should be able to cast epic genocidal spells "kill all firstborns!"

It actually did more then that. It also killed EVERYONE who was outside.

Tiamat's not bad as evil gods go provided you're a chromatic dragon or chromatic dragon related.

What does he offer? I always thought Tiamat was just totally into himself and didn't care about others.
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77349 on: May 24, 2015, 04:04:39 am »

-Giving someone super strength so they can collapse a building
Sampson option would be a pretty good spell. When you cast it you only have a certain amount of time to get shit done before you die, but you become nigh-invncible, uber strong and can annihilate just about anything in the nearby vicinity.

Grim Portent

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77350 on: May 24, 2015, 04:14:18 am »

Old testament god was really quite an asshole.

Tiamat's not bad as evil gods go provided you're a chromatic dragon or chromatic dragon related.

What does he offer? I always thought Tiamat was just totally into himself and didn't care about others.

Tiamat in D&D is the mother of chromatic dragonkind. She has a divine realm in part of the hells, all dragons and mortals who worship her go there when they die, rather than go to the devils. If you're a dragon or dragon related you get better treatment. A very small number of chromatics get to be her consort.
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There once was a dwarf in a cave,
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Loud Whispers

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77351 on: May 24, 2015, 04:24:43 am »

Old times were assholish times. The whole genocide the world thing was pretty dickish though.

Orange Wizard

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77352 on: May 24, 2015, 05:35:21 am »

The whole genocide the world thing was pretty dickish though.
He only did it once, then promised not to do it again and gave us rainbows. Rainbows make everything better.
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scriver

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77353 on: May 24, 2015, 05:41:53 am »

If there is one thing that always kind of annoyed me about dungeons and dragons is how often it boiled down to the idea of "good" as "goody goody" even when they share universes with Odin, Thor, Osiris, Ra, and Zues... who are still good Deities but you wonder why they don't just smite someone.

I don't any of those gods exist in any DnD setting apart from the Egyptian ones (which, yes, are part of the Forgotten Realms Pan-pantheon. They got there through some portal gates to ancient Egypt along with more than a few ancient Egyptians, which founded, among others, the basis for the Thayan civilization. The super evil "Red Wizards of Thay" guys, you know).

Aside from that there's only Tyr, who only borrows superficial stuff from his namesake. Beyond that the closest you get to a "real" god is Aslan. Which, yes, is totally a god in the Forgotten Realms setting. Because that whole Egyptian stuff wasn't ridiculous enough already ;)
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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #77354 on: May 24, 2015, 05:44:06 am »

The whole genocide the world thing was pretty dickish though.
He only did it once, then promised not to do it again and gave us rainbows. Rainbows make everything better.
He did hang his bow up on it.
Course, god never said anything about his heavy armaments...
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