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[Tawa]

Dem sound like fighting words. You want a piece of me?!?!

No! Noooo! I didn't mean literally!

[NOMING INTENSIFIES]

SOMEONE INTENSIFY MAT IMMEDIATELY

[TD1]

Mat doesn't need it!
He may not vibrate, but he's got more than dice rattling in his head. He could take on any mere Descanite for intensity any day of the week!

[Lyeos]

An intensified Mat would be amazing. Same as an intensified 42.

[TD1]

Mat need not covet false glories. His intensity by far exceeds the realms imagined by even the biggest movers in Descanite society.

[Darvi]

[ANSWERING INTENSIFIES]

[acetech09]

You can't make this shit up.

A couple months ago, I went to Texas (1200 miles away) to buy a pristine-condition semi-classic car to replace my old one that got totaled. The seller was moving and couldn't afford to take the car with him. I got a good deal on probably one of the best pieces of machinery I've ever owned, and recently somebody offered to buy it for 50% more than what I paid.

Today, I accidentally click my craigslist bookmark and was about to close it, but another nice '80s japanese import caught my eye. The price was great. I haven't flipped a car in a while, I could definitely make a month's rent with it. I called the man and arranged a meeting.

It was the same guy. The same f***ing guy. Apparently he moved from Texas to about 5 miles away, and was given the second car (which I'm buying tomorrow) by his new neighbor.

I believe he is an incarnation of my personal deity.

[smjjames]

That's a hell of a coincidence.

[MaximumZero]

acetech09 has all the car luck.

Anyway, today, one of "my" (the district manager has told me to take ownership of the store, so I am. It's mine, and they're my employees, even though I'm only assistant manager,) employees showed an alarming lack of self awareness. She's...not at all attractive. She's quite...well, plain is a vast understatement. In fact, when I cracked a joke about needing a cute sales-girl, the manager of the store said agreed, stating that the aforementioned (only) female employee was "basically a dude." I hesitantly agree, based on her mannerisms, attitude toward other people (especially other women,) and general physical maintenance (my hair looks better than hers.)The lack of self-awareness showed when she began talking about how her boyfriend believed she could be a legit pornstar. I had to stifle a giggle.

[Yoink]

Tennessee bringing back the electric chair.
Not a very good news site, I know (it's Vice), but I personally find this a pretty big WTF. Although apparently some states already offered the chair as an option? Still, these guys are making it involuntary.

[TamerVirus]

Shocking

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 

[acetech09]

Oh god.

Let's be less negative around here, ok?

[Yoink]

Shocking

I have to say, that pun was quite well executed.

[Mictlantecuhtli]

Oh god.

Let's be less negative around here, ok?

... Is this an unintentional electricity pun?

[Yoink]

Oh god.

Let's be less negative around here, ok?

... Is this an unintentional electricity pun?

I'm pretty sure he could press charges for suggesting that.

[crazysheep]

Oh god.

Let's be less negative around here, ok?

... Is this an unintentional electricity pun?

I'm pretty sure he could press charges for suggesting that.

Will he face resistance?