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Author Topic: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O  (Read 14841486 times)

Helgoland

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47745 on: April 21, 2014, 05:45:04 pm »

Sure I can get my hands on an army spade. The problem is delivery.
Jam it into a rifle. Take aim. Fire.
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Arguably he's already a progressive, just one in the style of an enlightened Kaiser.
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Knit tie

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47746 on: April 21, 2014, 05:55:54 pm »

Well you see, I can only throw spades into people's heads at that distance, otherwise the Russian magic doesn't work, so you have to designate a sacrifice, cause these things are lethal, even with helmets and bunker walls between them and your head.
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Steelmagic

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47747 on: April 21, 2014, 05:59:07 pm »

I'm sure one of my friends would volunteer.

I mean I suppose that I could just buy one and not have one of my friends die from a spade to the head, but that would be boring.
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Helgoland

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47748 on: April 21, 2014, 06:06:44 pm »

Is Knit tie an SCP?
Nope, Russia is. That's why America tried to contain it.

Knit, I know a few assholes around here - how precise do you need the information?
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Arguably he's already a progressive, just one in the style of an enlightened Kaiser.
I'm going to do the smart thing here and disengage. This isn't a hill I paticularly care to die on.

Knit tie

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47749 on: April 21, 2014, 06:31:26 pm »

Is Knit tie an SCP?
All trueborn siberians can call upon the faintest echoes of Emerald Circle Sorcery, an ability which originates from that antediluvian time when Prince Ivan battled Kachey the Deathless and, in order to give his army an edge, got very creative with permanent Power-Awarding Prana derivatives of his own making. Long story short, with proper training and about a week of ritual dance and vodka annointment, the descendants of his sorcerer-warriors can call upon the slivers of their power, allowing them to use, for example, the Blood-Anointed Martyr Courier spell which I described right now. But you'll have to pay for the vodka, the rituals need at least three crates.

Is Knit tie an SCP?
Nope, Russia is. That's why America tried to contain it.

Knit, I know a few assholes around here - how precise do you need the information?
It works only on people who are willing to have an object come and kill them, hence the "Martyr Courier" in the name and why I asked for a sacrifice, not a target. I need the name and the face of the person, and also for them to be aware of the ritual that's taking place and formally express their consent with being killed by the object that's being delivered. And yes, after the spell takes effect, there is no escape for the poor bastard, whatever is thrown will find them, phase through every obstacle in the path and lodge itself either in their heart or their brain, even if the thrown object is a piece of paper.
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Descan

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47750 on: April 21, 2014, 06:46:27 pm »

...

Wait, how are we going to get the three creates of vodka to you...?
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Knit tie

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47751 on: April 21, 2014, 06:52:32 pm »

...

Wait, how are we going to get the three creates of vodka to you...?
By giving me money to buy them locally?
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Descan

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47752 on: April 21, 2014, 08:27:03 pm »

...

Aw...

* Descan packs his intercontinental trebuchet away ;-;
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StupidElves

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47753 on: April 21, 2014, 08:30:37 pm »

I thought I could launch an ICBM with vodka at ya... Guess not...





Why can't I ever use the nuke?
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tahujdt

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47754 on: April 21, 2014, 08:42:27 pm »

This conversation happening is my WTF, and is one of the reasons why I love this forum.

Anyway, if you need something to do with your ICBM, I have contacts in a number of burgeoning third-world powers who would be interested.
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StupidElves

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47755 on: April 21, 2014, 08:44:58 pm »

But it's not the same as delivering weak booze to someone with it...
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alway

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47756 on: April 21, 2014, 09:27:36 pm »

Now I'm wondering if there ever was an intercontinental trebuchet.

Given how common seiges on Constantinople were, I'm actually inclined to think it could have existed.
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Mictlantecuhtli

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47757 on: April 21, 2014, 09:35:03 pm »

Now I'm wondering if there ever was an intercontinental trebuchet.

Given how common seiges on Constantinople were, I'm actually inclined to think it could have existed.
/Googles 'intercontinental trebuchet'
/finds http://blog.markshead.com/478/phrases-i-like/
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Some phrases I like:

Constructive Sarcasm
Intercontinental Trebuchet

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Descan

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47758 on: April 21, 2014, 09:44:25 pm »

I agree with Marks Head.
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hops

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #47759 on: April 21, 2014, 09:49:03 pm »

I think I like this Marksh Ead
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