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[NobodyPro]

So I know a bit about the meaning of Tarot cards and a person I know spotted my deck on my shelf.

Friend: Could you do a reading?
Me: Uh, sure.
*shuffles deck, draws The Fool*
Friend: So it's saying I'm an idiot?
Me: No, it's the beginning or the end of a journey. It could also mean you've got your head in the clouds.
*draws Five of Stars*
Me: I can't remember that one.
*draws Death*
Friend: (looking genuinely worried) Am I gonna die?
Me: Nah, it's just the end of something, like a phase of your life or something you consider regular.
*draws Ten of Swords*
Me: That's just something about honesty.

This friend is more than a little superstitious and I'm not sure how they would react if they found out I drew the actual 'death card'.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

You should replace every card with the Devil and Judgement and do it again.

[SalmonGod]

Cyclops Shark

It looks so dumpy.

[Lord Dullard]

[MetalSlimeHunt]

HE'S GOT FUTURE TECH, TAKE HIM DOWN!

[PanH]

He's using FedEx technology !

[Bauglir]

Your methods intrigue me, and I wish to subscribe to your newsletter.

[Ameablable]

my friend had the same thing happen to him only with 300 gb a second. steams gone crazy

[Digital Hellhound]

So that's where my download rate has gone to. You bastard.

[Knight of Fools]

Imagine how fast you could hack with speeds like that. You'd be able to take over the world!


Or just download the everything, but I'm sure you'd run out of hard drive space in the first nanosecond.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

Not sure if this was a reference to it, but in ME3, I always hated that argument that Shepard used. 'You're using Reaper tech!'

As if using Reaper technology is some kind of great evil. I suppose he should just off EDI, since she was based on some, too.

Well, direct Reaper technology does tend to cause indoctrination, followed by horrible things. Even dead gods can still dream.

[Truean]

Rookie lawyer has decided to get snippy. Whatever, it's just another snippy person. Seems I'm collecting 'em.

I'm eating and he's not shutting up about things, which ... meh.

Finally rookie is going off about how he can't figure out if (so and so)  works at a certain place and etc etc etc. Bitch, bitch, bitch bitch, bitch. Really, kid? Really? About this? This is simple:

Lawyer: "Alright, give me the number after I swallow this."
Rookie: "I told you, they won't let me talk about it and they hang up."
Lawyer: "[swallows] I told you, gimme the number."
Rookie: "They aren't gonna...."
Lawyer: "Number, gimme."
Rookie: "The H.R. won't. [is cut off]"
Lawyer: "Listen very carefully, screw H.R.. H.R. don't do nothin' right.  Used to be, we called 'em 'personnel,' because we wouldn't let those bastards dream of gettin' away with calling us 'resources;' they didn't do anything right then either. Never have, never will. Number. Gimme."

[Dials number] "Yes hello, would you please be so kind as to transfer me to the front receptionist and/or switchboard operator? Why yes, I'll hold, thank you so much."

[terrible hold music]

"Yes, hello is this the receptionist and switchboard operator? Wonderful, would you please transfer me to (so and so)? Thank you so much."

[terrible hold music]

(so and so): "Thank you for choosing (company), (so and so speaking)."

[hands phone to rookie] "It's for you."

[Akura]

Can I laugh at this?

[Ameablable]

THE HUMIDITY! OH GOD THE HUMIDITY!
ITS LIKE SWIMMING THROUGH THE AIR
WTF WEATHER

and i can also barely see with the fog that comes with it!!

[Aklyon]

Can I laugh at this?

(not the humidity, the lawyerity)

So the problem wasn't the company, it was him being too direct?