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[SalmonGod]

I watched the video, and I couldn't actually see the stabbing

It happened when the guy halfway jumped over the door to the booth.  As he was leaning half his body over the top for those couple seconds, there was a jab to the shoulder.

What surprised me the most is how calm everybody was about it.  Bystanders obviously didn't like what they were seeing but didn't seem very concerned either.

[Akura]

I overhear on the bus a conversation between a woman and one of her guy-friends. She was going to a clinic to get a birth control injection. Then she was going down to Florida to have a fun weekend with her boyfriends(note the plurality). The reason her boyfriends, who I assume all know each other as well, won't come up to Long Island is because apparently the rampant gangs in these two counties know them and have targetted them for death. And this woman wasn't sure that she was actually going to get the birth control, mainly because she was afraid her numerous enemies at the clinic(who probably work for the gangs) might have poisoned the medication.

I wish I was making this up .

Oh, and that anime thing from a few pages back:

By Production I.G., a 2000 episode murder mystery anime about Akura's brain.

[Vorthon]

My laughter. It is frothy now for some reason. I don't why, and it is confusing the hell out of me.

[kaijyuu]

<- is having difficulty imagining "frothy" laughter.


You got rabies or something?

[Jopax]

Can't find my keyes. They were in my pocket yesterday, I haven't left the house since then, where the hell could they be!?!?!?

[Vorthon]

<- is having difficulty imagining "frothy" laughter.


You got rabies or something?

Well, frothy is maybe a bit of hyperbole, but there are bubbles. Lots of bubbles. And, no, I'm not rabid.

[Akura]

I just remembered a dream I had last night. I was using a can of compressed air to clean out my computer, or I thought I was, but I somehow picked up a can of some flammable aerosol instead. And somehow, someone turned on my computer while I was cleaning it(normally impossible, since I unplug everything from it), resulting in a small explosion that destroyed most of the insides. And while I was about to try salvage what I could, someone, possibly the same someone who turned it on, began to try that themself. Only, they kept trying to rip out parts that were securely in place, without removing what kept them in there. I could only watch in horror as they destroyed what was left of my computer.

Can't find my keyes. They were in my pocket yesterday, I haven't left the house since then, where the hell could they be!?!?!?

Maybe on a Covenant battlecruiser, encased in Flood?

[Flying Dice]

Can't find my keyes. They were in my pocket yesterday, I haven't left the house since then, where the hell could they be!?!?!?

Maybe on a Covenant battlecruiser, encased in Flood?

Beat me to it.

[scriver]

Can't find my keyes. They were in my pocket yesterday, I haven't left the house since then, where the hell could they be!?!?!?

Hole in pocket? Fell out where you put it down? Underpants Gnomes?

[Phantom of The Library]

Car key gnomes are a lesser known and more annoying variant of the lawn gnome.  Lawn gnomes are content to sit in one place and scare off visitors, car key gnomes hide in the insulation of your house and come out at night to move your keys to a new location.
Other creatures in the gnome genus include: book gnomes, wallet gnomes, pencil gnomes (by far the fastest) and the elusive password gnome.

[Aklyon]

YOu forgot the sock gnome.

[RedWarrior0]

Gnot to megntion that gravity is caused by gnomes.

[Urist Imiknorris]

Oh, and that anime thing from a few pages back:

By Production I.G., a 2000 episode murder mystery anime about Akura's brain.

It was The Boss.

[Darvi]

Can't find my keyes. They were in my pocket yesterday, I haven't left the house since then, where the hell could they be!?!?!?

Do a Bauer and torture yourself until you spit out where they are.

If you're less of a badass and more of a raving madman you can torture somebody else instead.

[Dutchling]

I lost my keys two days ago at school. The next day they were still in my lockers lock.
Facepalm.