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Author Topic: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O  (Read 14840763 times)

MaximumZero

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #960 on: July 09, 2011, 04:36:09 pm »

I think I just upstaged everyone in the "Bizarre foods" thread. Srsly, why did I eat some of these things? I wasn't even homeless yet!
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Holy crap, why did I not start watching One Punch Man earlier? This is the best thing.
probably figured an autobiography wouldn't be interesting

breadbocks

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #961 on: July 10, 2011, 05:59:16 am »

SCP 297.

Don't look for sanity's sake. PLease.
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612DwarfAvenue

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #962 on: July 10, 2011, 06:45:15 am »

SCP 297.

Don't look for sanity's sake. PLease.

I looked it up.

At first i was like


But then i was like
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My voice acting portfolio.
Centration. Similar to Spacestation 13, but in 3D and first-person. Sounds damn awesome.
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Heliman

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #963 on: July 10, 2011, 06:16:08 pm »

SCP 297.

Don't look for sanity's sake. PLease.
VVV
Quote
SCP-297 is a transparent plastic vibrator, approximately 30 cm in length, 5 cm in width... SCP-297 was retrieved from the third basement of the parking structure of a thirty-story apartment building in Los Angeles, California, on ██-██-████. According to eyewitnesses, the device bored a vertical hole through the entire building's northwestern corner, starting from the 30th floor and proceeding, floor by floor, through the entire structure, until a quick-witted maintenance worker neutralized the device by turning it off. All witnesses were detained and administered a Class A Amnesiac, and the device was retrieved by SCP Foundation personnel. A large quantity of organic slurry (later identified as a liquefied human body) was found on the thirtieth floor, at the upper limit of the damage.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

« Last Edit: July 10, 2011, 06:26:34 pm by Heliman »
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MetalSlimeHunt

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #964 on: July 10, 2011, 06:24:14 pm »

And then Bay 12 became Reddit, apparently.
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #965 on: July 10, 2011, 07:55:21 pm »

Went on a 12-mile canoe trip today.  Here's the highlight of the day.

We stopped for some rest/play time at a nice spot where there was a sandy beach on one side and a large rock overhang on the other.  So we landed on the beach and the more outdoorsy adventerous of us built up the courage to swim across the strong current in the middle to reach the calm, deep, shaded area under the rock overhang.  I'm the first one to get there, expecting to tread water and rest for a bit after fighting the current... but was surprised to find a very convenient rock shelf a couple feet under the water.

So we were happily standing there talking about geological formation and the likelihood of cave development beneath the water... and I spot a blue tailed skink.  It's just clinging there to the wall behind us.  I try to catch it, but I'm too afraid of crushing it against the rock or pinning its tail (which will fall off), while there are too many little pockets and crevices for it to cleverly weave through for the classic use-one-hand-to-chase-it-into-the-other technique to work. 

At one point, it jumps into the water and then clings to the wall again just above water level.  So it looks like it doesn't have much of anywhere to go.  I think I'm going to get it this time.  I prepare carefullly, placing one leg higher up on the incline for balance as I lean forward... and it jumps into the water again and disappears.  It really disappears.  Cannot figure out where it went.  As soon as it jumped in, I looked downstream and it wasn't there in the water.  Then I realize... the bottom of my swimming shorts were hanging just down to water level... and... yup... there's a squirming there. 

There's a lizard in my shorts.  It's underneath the lining, so I can't reach in and get it from the top, and it's too far up to reach from the bottom.  I can't get it out without taking my shorts off.  It's just clinging to my butt, enjoying its safety there.   I try for a while to chase it out, but it is really stubborn.  It just wiggles up closer to the waistband and refuses to move. 

This goes on for a while.  Everyone has a good laugh about it.  All the obvious perverted jokes are made that one can make about a guy having a lizard in his pants.  Finally, I feel a wiggle and I can't find it anymore.  I pat myself down quite thoroughly and cannot find it.  It must have dropped out.

So it seems that amusing episode is over with.  We play in the water for a while longer and swim back across to the beach to get on with out canoe trip.  We have 8 people in our group, including our two kids, so it takes a while to get going.  It's like 20 minutes later after we've been paddling in the canoe again for a few minutes, when I adjust my shorts to alleviate a wedge (those swimming trunk linings can be really annoying)... and I feel a wiggle...

The lizard is still in my shorts!

How in the hell it has avoided getting crushed or drowned or suffocated under the fabric is beyond me, but he's alive and well and still clinging to my butt getting very nearly sat on.  There's no way I can deal with this in the canoe, and we're uneasy about making the deadline for final landing.  So I coax him around to the front and just keep going.

I ended up having a lizard in my shorts for something like 3 hours today.  Definitely a new experience for me.
« Last Edit: July 10, 2011, 07:58:02 pm by SalmonGod »
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Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

Angel Of Death

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #966 on: July 10, 2011, 08:10:54 pm »

I decided to read the "High Octane Nightmare Fuel" artical on TV Tropes... Why the fuck is Pokemon in the artical?
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SalmonGod

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #967 on: July 10, 2011, 08:14:10 pm »

Think about Pokemon for a few minutes... seriously...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)
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In the land of twilight, under the moon
We dance for the idiots
As the end will come so soon
In the land of twilight

Maybe people should love for the sake of loving, and not with all of these optimization conditions.

Karnewarrior

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #968 on: July 10, 2011, 08:15:11 pm »

I ended up having a lizard in my shorts
sig'd

I decided to read the "High Octane Nightmare Fuel" artical on TV Tropes... Why the fuck is Pokemon in the artical?
The torture they put those things through.

Poke'balls.
Think about it for a second.
A animal. In a small ball. With no way out. For days. No food, no water. No light. Nothing to do. Just being cramped in a tiny ball for days, with no-one to talk to, no-one to comfort you, nothing. Just opressive, constricting blackness.

Don't even get me started on Team Rocket's Terrorist acts.
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #969 on: July 10, 2011, 08:18:28 pm »

SCP 297.

Don't look for sanity's sake. PLease.
VVV
Quote
SCP-297 is a transparent plastic vibrator, approximately 30 cm in length, 5 cm in width... SCP-297 was retrieved from the third basement of the parking structure of a thirty-story apartment building in Los Angeles, California, on ██-██-████. According to eyewitnesses, the device bored a vertical hole through the entire building's northwestern corner, starting from the 30th floor and proceeding, floor by floor, through the entire structure, until a quick-witted maintenance worker neutralized the device by turning it off. All witnesses were detained and administered a Class A Amnesiac, and the device was retrieved by SCP Foundation personnel. A large quantity of organic slurry (later identified as a liquefied human body) was found on the thirtieth floor, at the upper limit of the damage.
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Remember it's the company's policy never to imply ownership.
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Akura

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #970 on: July 10, 2011, 08:34:28 pm »

Don't even get me started on Team Rocket's Terrorist acts.
Although most of the time, they have the decency to lock them in a cage rather than a small ball. Then again, the second episode of the anime(Team R's first appearance), they tore up the power generator to the Pokemon Center(hospitals, not sure about vetinary centers, typically have their own backup generators), likely shutting down life support and ICU, certainly causing horrific deaths of many injured Pokemon... who probably wouldn't be injured in the first place if 10-year-olds didn't cause them to fight each other until they were in that condition.
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Angel Of Death

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #971 on: July 11, 2011, 12:13:50 am »

My left eye just started twitching to the point where it cannot see properly... WTF?
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ILikePie

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #972 on: July 11, 2011, 06:05:32 am »

I was nearly killed by man's best "friend" today. My "friends" don't chase me down a few blocks while screaming at the top of their lungs.
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ChairmanPoo

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #973 on: July 11, 2011, 08:35:00 am »

Was it your friend or was it someone else's friend? If the latter, there is your answer.
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RedKing

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Re: Things that made you go "WTF?" today o_O
« Reply #974 on: July 11, 2011, 08:48:05 am »

I was nearly killed by man's best "friend" today. My "friends" don't chase me down a few blocks while screaming at the top of their lungs.
Our man's best friend bit a half-inch long gash in my finger the other day because the dumbass thought I was trying to steal a single bit of kibble wen in fact I was trying to place it back inside his dish while he was eating. Just prior to this, my toddler son had his entire hand in the dish, playing around while the dog ate around his hand.

WTF, dawg? While I'm glad you treat the boy with the utmost respect and deference, you've known me for EIGHT years, you furry traitor!
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