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[Comrade P.]

Watchu talkin' about? It's the best thing ever!

To watch from waaaaaay over the pond, that is.

[Eric Blank]

Ah yes, its always in our best interests to ensure you lot are thoroughly entertained, after all.


The only way this contest can be solved is by 100 kicks to the groin from a professional football player. Whichever candidate survives doesn't have the metaphorical balls or brains to fuck things up too badly anyway, if they both die we vote on their VP candidates, who are probably more competent than them anyway.

[Frumple]

Eh, it's not going to end, anyway. Not with the US campaigning cycle. You want it to stop but when one election ends the stumping for the next one has already started. It is the song that never ends, except less endearing.

[x2yzh9]

Whispers silently,  "Gary...Gary Johnson

[hector13]

Too many Aleppo moments.

[MetalSlimeHunt]

There is no war in Aleppo.

[Reelya]

One of the laundromat TVs has Ancient Aliens on. I'm not close enough to hear, but I can tell it's a load of crackpot crap. The intro looked like "OMG! The Mars Rover took a B/W photo of what may be a vaguely pyramid-shaped rock in the distance! It must be aliens!"

The next part looked as though they were comparing the human brain's shape to the shape of planet Earth, and a 3D model of the neuron map to the galaxy, therefore ALIENS! People make money on this stuff?

I'm certain you hold equally nutty beliefs. If you are bothered by the Ancient Aliens, be comforted by the knowledge that many people are ignorant and dis-informed, so it should be possible to educate.

The best one I ever read was on an actual UFO investigation website: the story was that this family believed that aliens were teleporting down into their house, via a closet. Fair enough so far, right? Their closet was a teleport pad for aliens. A perfectly reasonable belief. Well, they ended up with actual evidence - a claw from the alien! It ended up in the hands of some UFO investigators, who sent it to a lab who had trouble identifying it. Must be aliens, right? They're hard to identify. In the end, the claw turned out to be a dried up slug.

[Frumple]

... a dried up slug, the fallen claw brethren of a slug hive explorator of sselesu 6, left to disguise their compromised teleportation beacon. Once more a member of the collective of hive minds escapes discovery.

[pisskop]

Mollusks are actually aliens.

They slimed their way here.   thats why they are so soft and squishy.  And anti-salt.

True fact.  Aliens that are not hydro-phobic or germo-phobic are salinophoic.  totally

[x2yzh9]

I once had a slug on my right arm and that shit hurt when I took it off. That was a wtf moment for me back when I was younger

[Frumple]

They do have teeth, for what it's worth. Tiny little slug teeth.

[Calidovi]

cia case #666

reptillian jew slugs and their plot to overthrow world leaders by eating the garden cucumbers of single american housewives

the world bows to the housewives

[Frumple]

Though I had apparently forgotten just how many teeth slugs have. They average around 27k. If a similarly sized slug and shark gave you a full toothed grin, the slug would win.

[Rolan7]

It may win the battle, but not the war.  *nom*

[TD1]

All we'd have to do is release the French. It's the only war they wouldn't run from.