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[penguinofhonor]

On the contrary, those ducks seem to know exactly what they're doing.

[Truean]

http://gizmodo.com/5917925/apples-new-maps-app-wants-you-to-drive-off-a-bridge

And then, Bill Gates just got pissed one day and decided he had had quite enough of people using those other computers....

Hilarity causality ensued. The computers told everyone not to mind.

[Urist Imiknorris]

Remember that conversation about stupid ducks a few pages back?

Those ducks aren't stupid, they're assholes.

[Skyrunner]

It's official, Apple's evil!

[kaijyuu]

You just noticed that?

[GlyphGryph]

So are we doing WTF gifs now? Cause I've got like a folder full of them I've pulled from 4chan - including both the ones posted.

...on second thought, that's probably a terrible idea. I think I won't.

[Skyrunner]

You just noticed that?

It's official.

Btw, I never noticed that highway 280 was the one in front of Apple.

[SalmonGod]

I leaned back in the cheap office chair provided by the company.  I needed a moment to savor the inner glow I feel whenever I discover a fresh idea.  My hands idly fidgeted the jagged edges of the chair's broken arm, which had become familiar since management had forbidden any movement of chairs between desks due to some recent childish conflicts.

This deserved to be passed on.  This forum member's discovery of the SCP website is what prompted me to take a look and see if I could find anything new and interesting there myself.  It was only fitting that I pass what I discovered back to him.  I re-opened the browser window and... closed it again.

I got up and took a quick trip to the restroom.  I'd taken too long to read that page.  Frank was sure to notice the gap in productivity later, and want to know why I took so long in this shipment.  I needed something I could legitimately note in my log, which could then be used to deflect the inevitable inquiry.

When I got back, the new hire was sitting a couple desks down the row from me.  He must have just been let out of training and assigned a seat.  Everybody was talking about this guy.  You just don't see seven foot men with rippling muscles and tattoos, most notably the bull horns, doing data entry.  I'd also heard that HR was having some rather bizarre troubles with his paperwork.

I pulled the quote from the forum and moved it over into notepad.  It draws less attention than an open browser window.

My WTF of the month, The SCP Foundation. How the hell do people think of these?

They are very, very good. Its amazing.

On that note, I just discovered SCP-1893.  I never noticed "Top Rated Pages" link there before.  I'll definitely be going through and reading all of those now...

Just as I hit the post button, the new guy got up and stalked past me.  He glared down at me out of the corner of his eye as he past, as if he somehow knew what I was up to and disapproved deeply.  I glanced at the time.  I'd been in this shipment for half an hour.  How had it taken that long to write those three sentences?  Must have spaced out.  Oh well... back to work...

[GlyphGryph]

Wife just screamed, raced to see what had happened, she followed me into the living room. She sits on the couch, we stare at each other for a while, she ignores my questions about whether or not she's okay.

"There's nothing there, right?" she asks, after a bit.
"What? There's nothing where?" I ask in return.
She looks around, then looks back at it me.
"Around the base of the plant. Is there anything around the base of the plant?" she asks.

There's a single plant in the room, but it's behind her - she hasn't looked at it since she came in, and she's staring at the bedroom door as she says it.

"No," I say. "Nothing."

She nods, pauses a moment, then goes "ugh", goes to the bathroom and returns to bed.

Not as bad as last night, where she came in to tell me there were worms everywhere and she woke up with blood on her, but still, wtf.

[Pnx]

... So is your wife is schizophrenic or what?

[SalmonGod]

Sounds like it could just be really strong nightmares.  I've dealt with similar things.  Mine can continue to be caught partially experiencing a nightmare for several minutes after waking up.  Ten years ago, she'd sometimes get up in the middle of the night and run around completely trapped in her nightmare, with everything real around her being apparently incorporated into it.  I would seem to appear to her as some sort of monster, and she'd run away from me.  I'm so glad that shit doesn't happen anymore.

[GlyphGryph]

It's a lot like... surely you've had those mornings where you've woken up from a dream feeling absolutely certain it was real? This is a lot like that, except moreso.

Nowhere near half as bad as me and my brother used to be, thank god, which was combined with sleepwalking so we'd literally be going into and out of sleep state (and usually explicitly continue dreaming through the whole process), and even if we were woken up (super hard), it would still feel real. It's, like mentioned above, just a really strong dream - not uncommon, just not something I expected from her - in the years we've been together, she's never done it before

[Sirus]

Had a crazy experience this morning. I woke up and checked my phone, like I do every morning, when I see that I have a text message from my mom. I read it, and it says that my grandfather had died. I call her, she says that she's coming home as soon as she can and we'll be taking off later in the day.

I put the phone on the headrest and just kinda lie there in bed for a while. I decide to text her back, asking how long we'll be gone so I can pack some spare clothes...and the phone isn't where I left it. I get up and look for it. It's over where I leave it to charge overnight. No message about a dead grandpa. Nothing at all. I hesitate to call it a dream, because I could have sworn that I wasn't actually asleep, but I'm not actually sure what else it could have been.

[GlyphGryph]

Sounds exactly like a dream to me. I can't even tell you how many morning's I've been through before waking up - and you only get the jar if you actually end the dream somewhere other than bed. Otherwise, it's seamless.

[SalmonGod]

I actually remembered a good portion of my dreams a couple days ago... I think it was a couple days ago... and now I only remember about a 5 second chunk out of the whole thing.

Goddamnit!

I tried the thing where you write down your dream as soon as you wake up a couple years ago, when I had a really epic dream.  When I tried to go back and read it later, it made no sense to me at all.  It's a shame.  All I know is that there was really awe-inspiring imagery involved (the only part I remember is lots of really large objects and water falling all around me), and it took place on a world that goes through a dramatic cycle of destruction and rebirth that had some really deep and meaningful mechanism behind it.  It was the mechanism behind that cycle that I tried to copy down, but apparently I failed miserably at communicating it due to having just woken up.

I tried the trick where you develop a reality-check habit to trigger lucidity.  I counted my fingers several times a day at random for over a year.  Nothing ever came of it.