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[Spehss _]

Played Pony Island. Finished in one sitting. In the middle of the night. In a pitch black room.

That was a trip. 10/10 would recommend.

[da_nang]

Be me. Check bank account, see 19+ € and celebrate.
Head for local store and start loading the cart for next week. Comes up to about 17€.
Checkout. Get rid of some 5 cent coins. Cost is now about 16€.
Swipe card. Transaction failed. WTF.
Try again. Fail.
Try several more times. Fails.
Ask cashier WTF.
Cashier says "Not enough money".
Add the rest of my hard cash, just in case. Cost roughly 14€. Try again. Fail.
Head out to the nearest cash dispenser to check account. 3+€. FML.
Pick out bare essentials, cat food taking the lion's share. Cost now 2.70 €.
Try again. Success.
Pack stuff and head home. Wonder if bank added some fee in the time I was away from home.
Come home, check account. 50 cents. FML.
Check transaction history. Last transaction at the store is reserved because not banking day today.
Check for mysterious fee-
See 16€ transaction reservation. From the store. Today. WTF!
Take photo proof. Quickly head back to the store.
Talk to cashier, who is also the manager. Ask WTF and for a refund.
Cashier says no can do, problem with system and bank.
Bank closed today. FML. 

[Tack]

€

Oh you poor thing.

On a serious note- been there, that sucks.

[Greiger]

I just got things all fixed up.  I Removed the damaged duct tape'd together pull out shelf from my desk and drilled some cardboard at the bottom.  There we go, now I have a small shelf for gamepads and my DS.

Replaced my desk chair that was held together with duct tape with a new one.   Replaced my desk fan that was also more or less being held together with duct tape.  And cannibalized some screws from an old junker pc to put the caseplate back on my computer, which used to be held on with, you guessed it, duct tape.

Finally my office is duct tape free for the first time in years!  Time to play some games! *snap*

My headset snapped in half and now it is being held together with duct tape.  The Illuminati is real.  And they are run by the people who make duct tape.

[Akura]

They run the aluminum foil industry. Why else do they suggest wearing a foil hat to block mind-control rays?

The aluminati is real, sheeple.

[Teneb]

Woah, last time I tried to dub someone the saint of the sad thread, things got ugly. Let's not make a god of shitposts.

I unilaterally declare LW the patron saint of shitposting as in accordance to the powers vested in me by myself.

[TheBiggerFish]

Woah, last time I tried to dub someone the saint of the sad thread, things got ugly. Let's not make a god of shitposts.

I unilaterally declare LW the patron saint of shitposting as in accordance to the powers vested in me by myself.

Praise.

[Tawa]

So I've been flipping through the Infinite Esoteric Wisdom of mus2kack that I recorded for future generations last night and have compiled a list of topics that she offers advice on:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

-Shipping pregnant chain smokers
-Using a username and e-mail address to sign up for Dr. Stanley's Retrieve a Lover spell
-The mail accounts of rugby players
-How putting the conclusion at the end of a summary template will make people invest in your business
-Not forcing yourself onto lovers at the laundromat
-Sheep herding
-The "information crush" and its effect on short-circuiting electrical systems and computer viruses
-Dr. Leah Dickenstein and the late Dr. Wilbur's advice on selecting nursing homes for the elderly
-Growing azaleas through a wi-fi connection
-Weight loss
-Fish cover
-Dealing with diabetes
-Having sex with ice fishing models while watercolor painting
-Avoiding jacket shrinkage
-Generating website traffic
-Hotel security 46252
-Fossil watches
-Dealing with back pain
-How gossiping is a defensive mechanism for insecure girls
-Creating the "Illusion of the First Time" when giving a presentation
-Putting together an art competition with a strategic timeline and support from a foundation
-Nipple reconstruction in children with tag-end lines
-Using VOIP to contact tutors
-How believing can shape your life on romantic evenings in shelters for abused women
-How taking orders from beautiful things will attract Pisces women
-How getting grease stains out of clothes helps one deal with grief
-Using RG 6 coax cables to create t-shirts
-Chicken pox at PTA meetings
-Being polite on a scale of 1.0 to 7.9 while playing volleyball
-Making a headless man costume
-Copyediting routes for six-year-olds
-Wearing shoes with arched soles when cooking vegetables
-Penis enhancement for older children engaged in forced reading (I couldn't make this crap up if I tried)
-Incest side stories
-Not being average and instead having a career in being smaller when renting park rec centers
-Using viral marketing to turn one subscriber into five
-How to use advertisements to get subscribers instead of using random usernames for your Vividmaths channel
-Dos attacks from women who are holding your hand
-Rajesh Jha's inventions from Microsoft to help companies save time
-SMB cloud hosting allowing business-class email
-Approaching your employer to ask for a raise
-The impressiveness of water jet cutting machines
-Using sound maskers when playing footie and/or possibly getting a, uh, footjob, if you get what I'm saying (they weren't very clear on this)
-Using bikes on Amtrak routes unboxed
-Coaching clients to find out WHO THE QUEEN BEE is (caps in original)
-Deciding what you want when getting ear infections
-Attaching overflow containers to internet-enabled compost toilets
-The importance of listening when telling children about the lottery
-Wearing two sets of clothes when going to the hospital
-King Juan Carlos of Spain riding a pegasus while hanging photos on the wall
-The importance of the location of a house you want to buy
-Organizations implementing a new strategy
-LIVESTRONG Foundation is not a substitute for professional medical advice
-Help me I'm scared when filling out Medicare sign-up sheets
-Dealing with customer service at lanyard construction factories
-See separate spoiler
-Using lottery programs that come with money back guarantees when she tests your limits and gauges your reactions
-Milla's retro-chic sexiness and how the author hopes for a wardrobe malfunction
-Contingency when buying opiates due to addictions
-The value of life when editing adjustable wrenches
-Nailing together a rectangular corporation
-Something about sun glyphs
-How to put a mosaic around your fireplace before ripping it out
-How many parents don't care about their childrens' schoolwork
-Chiropractic subluxation
-How having someone else present when you perform a task makes people feel redundant
-Putting teabags on bleeding areas for labeling tasks
-Saving money to invest in college or retirement
-Using the matrix to complete quadrant 2 tasks and be honest with yourself
-Carl gaining 12 million customers by clicking a button 2 months ago
-Facts about lions eating
-How selling bonds at $88.50/32 is better than selling them at $75.00 each
-Re-installing Windows Vista on your picture wall

Spoiler: This one must be read to be believed (click to show/hide)

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Praise 2kack.

[Neonivek]

UGH! I just have no love for Pranks where the joke is "Ha ha! you thought you were in mortal danger!"

Watched a video where a guy pretends to bomb people (Dresses in White Robes, tosses a full backpack, and then runs)

Honestly... even as a "ha ha, your racist!" joke I roll my eyes.

[Loud Whispers]

UGH! I just have no love for Pranks where the joke is "Ha ha! you thought you were in mortal danger!"

Watched a video where a guy pretends to bomb people (Dresses in White Robes, tosses a full backpack, and then runs)

Honestly... even as a "ha ha, your racist!" joke I roll my eyes.

It was JUST A PRANK ALLAHU AKBAR

[Jopax]

Bastard probably didn't even throw down some sick lines afterwards.

[BlackFlyme]

Getting screamed at during dinner for not having my license by my mom's dickhead ex-boyfriend.

He also talked at length about how interesting shit-stains are to gross us out.

[Truean]

Applying for jobs is hard.

[TheBiggerFish]

Yeah, follow up with both of them if you're interested.

[Akura]

@BlackFlyme: Whyyyy is that asshole still around? Especially if he's an ex?