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[Mephisto]

This is basically a crosspost from the Giant in the Playground forums. There's a fairly lengthy thread there where people post funny things that happen during their gaming sessions. As I had a fairly amusing session last night, I thought I would share. Feel free to post your own.

Perhaps this would be better suited for Creative Projects? You decide!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Last night was the second and last session for my group's first Call of Cthulhu adventure. The time period was the 1920s. The place was Boston, Mass.

I'm a journalist with fairly average stats but a great dexterity. He excels in driving, fast talking, persuasion, medicine, locksmithing, and likely a few more that I can't recall. How broken is CoC's character generation? I routinely pull off superhuman feats when we're all supposed to be made of paper. He was quite fun to play.

Another guy is a soldier. He's not good at much besides what he's been trained to do. He shoots stuff and throws dynamite.

The final member of our troupe is an aging professor. I didn't get to see much of his skills. All I really know is that he's frail, has a very high POW, and is a terrible driver. The guy is new, so he wasn't introduced until about halfway through the session.


1. I was the only one on time to this session, so I do some minor stuff while waiting for the others. While looking through the window to the inn we're staying at, I see that the room is covered in blood. On the north wall are a strange eye symbol and some words. The Keeper tells me to make an Other Languages roll. I have none, meaning that I have to roll a 1 on d%. I succeed. Apparently I knew this exact phrase from a course in my college days.

2. I'm still the only one at this point and the Keeper doesn't want Soldier and I to get separated. Soldier is an NPC at this point.

We're tracking bloody footprints because we think whoever left them may have kidnapped the Mrs. of the inn we're staying at. We lose the trail. Soldier and I both fail our respective rolls, but he thinks he knows which way to go.

He takes us to... a beauty parlor. He then proceeds to nat-100 his persuasion roll, which leads to this interesting bit:

Soldier pulls gun on defenseless hairdresser. "Where is she?! What did you do with her?!"

Neighbors fail their listen checks for a good five minutes. I manage to calm Soldier down a bit before the cops finally arrive and we're taken in.

We're finally released by the police when they realize we didn't murder the owners of the inn. The doctor I retrieved corroborates our story. We're told not to leave town and not to disturb the crime scene.

3. The new guy is introduced and we're staying in our hotel. The soldier is downstairs in the owners' room. The owners were murdered while we were out, so they won't mind. I and the new guy are upstairs in the only remaining non-bloody visitor's room.

Soldier gets woken up by scratching in the wall. Having previously had many run-ins with rats, he kicks the wall. He succeeds in stubbing his toe through his steel-toed boots. Getting angry, he pulls out his rifle and blasts a hole in the wall. Through the hole, he sees a scroll with a fresh hole in it. He pulls the scroll out and a rat attempts to latch onto his hand. It fails, so he decides to shoot at the rat which is currently inside the wall. I and Professor are still asleep at this point, despite making listen rolls at ever-increasing bonuses.

Hearing a large swarm of rats, Soldier runs upstairs and begins yelling at us to get our shiz and get out of here. Keeper: "Roll less than 95 and you wake up." Prof: *rolls 95*; Me: *rolls 95*. Soldier decides to fire a shot into the roof, which finally wakes us up.

Recall in the last point that the police told us not to disturb the crime scene. In order to get rid of the rats, Soldier decides to throw a stick of dynamite into the house as we're leaving. Oops.

4. We face off against the BBEG. Prof has fallen down a flight of stairs and has been stabbed in the shoulder by a magic, flying knife by this point. He's not in very good shape.

Long story short, Prof is killed. Next round, Soldier removes the BBEG's head with near max damage on a crit success. 4d6+4. Eat it.

We hear sirens, so we book it and leave Prof's corpse there. Getting back to our mutual friend, he asks where Prof is.

Me with my insane skills: "He decided he would like to stay in Boston." *fast talk roll*

Friend: "Yeah, he said he always liked it there." *Hands over the rest of our payment*

Me: "We can deliver his cut to him as well if you would like." *persuade roll*

Friend: "Okay, thanks." *Hands over Prof's cut as well*

Prof's player informs me that he's now going to haunt me relentlessly.

The Keeper said the backstabbing is a nice setup for our next session, where we start a new system: Shadowrun.

[Frajic]

If only I'd have someone to play RPGs with. There isn't exactly a lot of interest for it around here, and online tabletop clients don't work too well seeing as most players are American, and I live in Europe. Their nights = way early in the morning(or late night) for me.

[lordnincompoop]

Forum games is for... well, games. And I dunno if this belongs in Creative Projects, as this is more about posting anecdotes than putting effort in and getting a plot, characters etc.

General Discussion or Other Games would be best.

If only I'd have someone to play RPGs with. There isn't exactly a lot of interest for it around here, and online tabletop clients don't work too well seeing as most players are American, and I live in Europe. Their nights = way early in the morning(or late night) for me.

Exactly my situation.

[Frajic]

If only I'd have someone to play RPGs with. There isn't exactly a lot of interest for it around here, and online tabletop clients don't work too well seeing as most players are American, and I live in Europe. Their nights = way early in the morning(or late night) for me.

Exactly my situation.

How about we find another one in our situation, an European DM, and go play Pathfinder together?

[Mephisto]

Forum games is for... well, games. And I dunno if this belongs in Creative Projects, as this is more about posting anecdotes than putting effort in and getting a plot, characters etc.

General Discussion or Other Games would be best.

I suppose that's correct. Moved.

[lordnincompoop]

If only I'd have someone to play RPGs with. There isn't exactly a lot of interest for it around here, and online tabletop clients don't work too well seeing as most players are American, and I live in Europe. Their nights = way early in the morning(or late night) for me.

Exactly my situation.

How about we find another one in our situation, an European DM, and go play Pathfinder together?

Okay.

I know sizeak and Nuke9.13 are currently in Europe, so maybe them?

[KaguroDraven]

We where running a 'do whatever comes to mind' kinda game, the story was loose enough so that the players could do what came to mind and our DM would allow it, to an extent. As I always do in that kind of game I made a sorceror with as many points in bluff as I possibly could. Thoughout the game I proceeded to do horrible and/or funny things and then lie my ass off to every NPC around to get away with it. Two particular moments fit into my 'win' catagory. First I used a scroll to turn the king into a frog, in the middle of a crowded room, with tons of guards and nobles. I convinced them all the queen did it, when she wasn't even in the room, becouse of a natural 20. At the end of the campain we had been paid by a demon to kill Asmodaias(I think that's how it's spelled) the lord of all devils, master of the 9th hell, etc. I bluffed the lord of all devils into thinking it was in his best interest to give me every drop of his power, and his title, and to go into hideing. The DM decided to end the game there before I, to use his words, "go mad with power and start makeing wars on the gods".

[Akura]

Never, ever, doubt the power of rolling a 20.

[Frajic]

We where running a 'do whatever comes to mind' kinda game, the story was loose enough so that the players could do what came to mind and our DM would allow it, to an extent. As I always do in that kind of game I made a sorceror with as many points in bluff as I possibly could. Thoughout the game I proceeded to do horrible and/or funny things and then lie my ass off to every NPC around to get away with it. Two particular moments fit into my 'win' catagory. First I used a scroll to turn the king into a frog, in the middle of a crowded room, with tons of guards and nobles. I convinced them all the queen did it, when she wasn't even in the room, becouse of a natural 20. At the end of the campain we had been paid by a demon to kill Asmodaias(I think that's how it's spelled) the lord of all devils, master of the 9th hell, etc. I bluffed the lord of all devils into thinking it was in his best interest to give me every drop of his power, and his title, and to go into hideing. The DM decided to end the game there before I, to use his words, "go mad with power and start makeing wars on the gods".

That's when you know you've won the game.

[Frajic]

If only I'd have someone to play RPGs with. There isn't exactly a lot of interest for it around here, and online tabletop clients don't work too well seeing as most players are American, and I live in Europe. Their nights = way early in the morning(or late night) for me.

Exactly my situation.

How about we find another one in our situation, an European DM, and go play Pathfinder together?

Okay.

I know sizeak and Nuke9.13 are currently in Europe, so maybe them?

Are they interested and/or DM?

[lordnincompoop]

I dunno. Go contact them.

[KaguroDraven]

We where running a 'do whatever comes to mind' kinda game, the story was loose enough so that the players could do what came to mind and our DM would allow it, to an extent. As I always do in that kind of game I made a sorceror with as many points in bluff as I possibly could. Thoughout the game I proceeded to do horrible and/or funny things and then lie my ass off to every NPC around to get away with it. Two particular moments fit into my 'win' catagory. First I used a scroll to turn the king into a frog, in the middle of a crowded room, with tons of guards and nobles. I convinced them all the queen did it, when she wasn't even in the room, becouse of a natural 20. At the end of the campain we had been paid by a demon to kill Asmodaias(I think that's how it's spelled) the lord of all devils, master of the 9th hell, etc. I bluffed the lord of all devils into thinking it was in his best interest to give me every drop of his power, and his title, and to go into hideing. The DM decided to end the game there before I, to use his words, "go mad with power and start makeing wars on the gods".

That's when you know you've won the game.

I'm actuilly half tempted to try and convince the DM to continue that game, just for a war on the gods.

[Frajic]

I dunno. Go contact them.

Or even better, make a thread.

The discussion shall now move over to that one.

[HonkyPunch]

I was GM of a Cthulhu D20 game (d20 version of call of cthulhu, we were more familiar with those rules) and suffice to say, it went surprisingly unwell.
I had one player who was a samurai with a katana (I figured hell, why not, could be good for laughs and will keep him interested.)
So, my players are in a warehouse, killing rats (I don't know what else to start with.) The rats are in a vent system that's hanging from the ceiling, so my player who is a journalist gets out his grappling hook, and manages to catch the vent, and then helps my samurai player climb up there. So, he gets up on it, and start stabbing downward into the vent, attempting to kill the rats. The journalist player gets the brilliant idea for him to cut the vent from the ceiling (it's cheap metal) so he tries. He digs his katana into the vent and starts running, and cutting the vent in half as he goes, lengthwise. About 3/4 of the way in, he hears a bloodcurdling scream, and the other players see a large amount of blood running from inside the vent. The vent then splits in half, and dumps the remaining rats out, followed by the corpse of a human child, that is now missing an arm. He hits the ground with a wet thud; my third player (I believe he was an investigator) fails his sanity check and starts screaming, and falls to the ground in the fetal position. Samurai player climbs down the brick wall, and rolls the child onto his back. He has a small blanket tied around his neck as a cape, and a burger king crown that says 'Rat King' on it in sharpie. Journalist player tries to calm down the Investigator simply by saying 'He was a burden to society, and he had dementia. He's better off dead.' They stuff his corpse in a bag of flower, finish off the rats, take their money and leave. This left me in a bad spot; the kid was the link to the next mission, they were supposed to find his parents, and then would figure out that there have been large amounts of missing children lately..so instead I had to pull something out of my ass.

[Sowelu]

That's...that's really horrifying.  D:

My best funny story was from D&D 3.0.  Plot background: There's some scary planar stuff going on with barriers being lowered, so occasionally portals to the plane of fire will open up (but all anyone knows is that these massive fireballs from nowhere keep hovering through the town and burning things).  The party needs to get this amulet from a wizard who works for the local mafia.  So they go from tavern to tavern with a rallying cry of "Kill the wizard, stop the fires" until they've got about a hundred angry drunks with torches and pitchforks converging on his house.  Of course the wizard starts chucking lightning bolts at the angry mob, while the party sneaks around back and steals the amulet with Mage Hand + a fish hook.