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Author Topic: You are all monsters.  (Read 73148 times)

DarkWolfXV

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #210 on: October 05, 2011, 01:02:49 pm »

My nobles are actually most usefull dwarves in my fortress, like, i give status of baron to my best warrior, same with other stuffz, and for king/queen, well, i just get him/her trained into a warrior.
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Goats will ignore your grass and eat the neighbours' roses. They're just evil bastards like that.
Probably thats why they are used with pentagrams on covers of Satanic Black Metal albums.
BURNING SHIT AND EATING ROOSESSSSSS DDOFOFAOAARRRAHYYYE

UristMcHuman

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #211 on: October 05, 2011, 03:53:00 pm »

We're not monsters. We're +Sociopathic dwarven killing machines+.

Impaling migrants is fun. As long as you keep the process nice and slow you will have fun.

Babies are fun to burn alive. Their fear soothes the sociopathic soul. It's even more fun to drown them.

Nobles are the scum of society. They deserve to be left for the forgotten beasts so the forgotten beast dust rots out their eyeballs and makes them bleed to death.
Yes, you are monsters. You are XXSociopathic murderersXX.

Impaling migrants is [ETHIC:KILL_ENTITY_MEMBER:UNTHINKABLE] to dwarfs.

Again, killing babies is the same as ^ the above.

One way why nobles need not be murdered: Occasionally unreasonable demands/mandates. The unhappiness is only minor. One reason why nobles may be killed: Demands/mandates for slade items.
ELF! MURDER THE ELF!

Oh quiet you, we got enough ignorant fanatics around here.. Such sad times we live in..
Now if you excuse me, I'll head over to the Noble's hall and converse on this matter with my peers.
While you're at it, could you please pull that lever over there?

You silly dorf.. Noble halls don't actually have.. oh.. seems like we DO have levers in our hall.. Guess I'll be migrating to another fort then..
But then doesn't that mean you'll just get impaled on spikes, drowned, crushed, burned, eaten alive, eaten dead, poisoned, driven to insanity, used as cannon fodder for goblins, or just forced to do labor until you have an ‼ACCIDENT‼?
AAIIIIAAAHH!!!!! RUN AWAY!!! RUN AWAY!!! I'll be back (on a different thread) you murderers! This isn't the last of me*!!!

*Well, at least for a while...

I'm afraid the front door is locked to keep the goblins out.  Would you mind going in this prepared Noble Safety Zone?  The one that looks like a 2-square room with a pressureplate rigged to a floodgate that may or may not trap them inside and open the way for the screw-pumped magma on the level above it.  Oh and ignore the grate in there.  That's for... water, yes water.  And not at all part of a self-contained magma shower...
Urist McHuman cancels Kill Evil People: Insane.
Urist McHuman has gone berserk! *pulls out crossbow and blasts open door with slade bolt*

Oh, and did I mention the fact that I carry a Minecraft Diamond Pickaxe? Useful for escaping prisons by mining out the walls*.

*strikes down all attacking goblins and fortress guard by himself*

(in a menacing and serious voice) I'll be back, you murderers!

*Or puppy-slaughtering, baby-drowning, elf-murdering fortresses.
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Ultimuh

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #212 on: October 05, 2011, 04:20:51 pm »

((You know.. perhaps we should make an RTD about this instead of derailing the thread?))
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Necro910

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #213 on: October 05, 2011, 04:23:47 pm »

((You know.. perhaps we should make an RTD about this instead of derailing the thread?))
Ultimuh used logic! Logic is ineffective!

Thread used dive!

Epithemius

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #214 on: October 05, 2011, 04:38:04 pm »

((You know.. perhaps we should make an RTD about this instead of derailing the thread?))
Ultimuh used logic! Logic is ineffective!

Thread used dive!
But it fails! Thread is already in dive!
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FoiledFencer

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #215 on: October 05, 2011, 06:43:46 pm »

((You know.. perhaps we should make an RTD about this instead of derailing the thread?))
Ultimuh used logic! Logic is ineffective!

Thread used dive!

But it fails! Thread is already in dive!
It's super effective!

Wee!
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"Lithrushâst Kúdlizat: Fetidfur, the slick notch, a grizzly bear leather loincloth. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It is studded with zinc, decorated with grizzly bear leather and encircled with bands of grizzly bear leather. This object menaces with spikes of grizzly bear leather."

Loud Whispers

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #216 on: October 05, 2011, 06:51:15 pm »

I dunno, Malcador did have a point.


....


WE NEED TO UP THE SOCIOPATHIC DORF KILLIN :D

Forumite

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #217 on: October 05, 2011, 10:03:28 pm »

Hey, Masons, get back to building that Ziggurat!

On a related issue, I actually try to care for my dwarves, and I see it as a personal failure when 3 of my 5 newly grown peasants died in the Danger Room, or due to infection afterwards. I try to keep nobels happy, fulfill mandates and doesn´t export against a ban, and make the homes of the noble so fantastic that they will never be unhappy. As for unwanted elephants, water buffaloes, goblins and trolls, I´m not nearly as nice. In my last fort, goblins were thrown from the stockpile straight down a short drop into magma, short enough that they easily survive the fall. I never pit all the goblins, always leaving a few left to tell their tales of horror to the next wave. The current fortress uses a 15 z-level drop, at the bottom of which there is a water-based cleaning system, used to remove blood from the bones and items. Sometimes I designate 20 goblins to be thrown down, then look at the bottom at the gibbs flying around.
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"The ability to quote is a serviceable substitute for wit." - W. Somerset Maugham

Person

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #218 on: October 05, 2011, 10:05:48 pm »

Obok Meatgod, that is all. I haven't done much sociopathic stuff yet, but I plan to so close enough.
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UristMcHuman

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #219 on: October 05, 2011, 10:28:08 pm »

I dunno, Malcador did have a point.


....


WE NEED TO UP THE SOCIOPATHIC DORF KILLIN :D
Down with sociopathism!!! (sociopathic ways)

You guys are already evil enough with the already-evil goblins! Why be evil with your own kind?!?!?!

As a challenge to test your sociopathic ways IRL: Why not kill YOUR OWN KID, butchering him/her, and using his/her bones as crafting materials????? Hmm? HMMM??? HMMMMMMM???????????????????? Oh, and for pets/nobility, do the same to your OWN DOG/CAT and U.S. Senate/House Of Representative members+President Barack Obama over in D.C.*

You should be killing babies, pets, and country rulers by now, "dwarf".

*Or whomever currently rules the country you're in right now.
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Jacob/Lee

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #220 on: October 05, 2011, 10:58:31 pm »

Nice job building the pyramids of Giza, guys! The Egyptians would be proud!

nerdyboy321123

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #221 on: October 05, 2011, 11:05:14 pm »

I dunno, Malcador did have a point.


....


WE NEED TO UP THE SOCIOPATHIC DORF KILLIN :D
Down with sociopathism!!! (sociopathic ways)

You guys are already evil enough with the already-evil goblins! Why be evil with your own kind?!?!?!

As a challenge to test your sociopathic ways IRL: Why not kill YOUR OWN KID, butchering him/her, and using his/her bones as crafting materials????? Hmm? HMMM??? HMMMMMMM???????????????????? Oh, and for pets/nobility, do the same to your OWN DOG/CAT and U.S. Senate/House Of Representative members+President Barack Obama over in D.C.*

You should be killing babies, pets, and country rulers by now, "dwarf".

*Or whomever currently rules the country you're in right now.
This is how DF is a beneficial part of society, it gives us sociopaths a harmless output for our unbelievably violent nature
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how exactly did you weaponize cows into emissary-assassins without causing the expected loyalty cascade?

Eoganachta

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #222 on: October 05, 2011, 11:40:53 pm »

((You know.. perhaps we should make an RTD about this instead of derailing the thread?))
Ultimuh used logic! Logic is ineffective!

Thread used dive!

But it fails! Thread is already in dive!
It's super effective!

Wee!
No more mushrooms for you. You're enjoying yourself too much. Now, back to work building some horribly doomed-to-failure megaproject to make +kitten tallow biscuits+
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WHERE DO YOU EVEN GET ENOUGH BABY FOR A PICKAXE? THERE ISN'T ENOUGH BABY.

Wannazzaki

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #223 on: October 05, 2011, 11:48:20 pm »

Bring out the goblin hewer!

http://www.games-workshop.com/MEDIA_CustomProductCatalog/m1251848_99110205091_ColWHGoblinHewerMain_445x319.jpg

Chain the elf up and see how long he lasts. Call it...Beta Testing
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Son of Slaanesh, full of desire, He does cocaine and his head's on fire! DOOOOOOOOOOOOOM Rider! Doom rider! Na na, na na!

dragonshardz

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Re: You are all monsters.
« Reply #224 on: October 06, 2011, 02:35:33 am »

Dear fucking God, why does this shit-tier thread keep getting necro'd?
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