1 Hematite, 1058:Attention, dwarves of Whiskeybridle: from this day forth, beards are no longer permitted. All male dwarves (and any females who might have beards) are required to shave their beards immediately. Any dwarf found with more than 1/256 of an inch of facial hair will be prosecuted to the full extent of the law. It is only with smooth faces that we can move forward to our glorious future.
- DuckThatQuacks, Overseer
3 Hematite, 1058:The men have been complaining quite a lot about my groundbreaking new law. I think they are slacking off as a form of protest. I'll need to find something to motivate them.
5 Hematite, 1058:A dwarf came sprinting back into the fortress today. He rushed into my office and desperately tried to tell me something.
"Oh Armok (*gasp*) they're coming!" he said, his face a mask of terror.
"What? Who is it? Who's coming?" I asked him.
"(*pant*) The el- (*wheeze*) It's the el- (*cough*)"
"Spit it out, man! Are the elves attacking us?"
"No, ma'am! It's worse," he said. "It's the elephants."
"What? Everyone knows that elephants are just stories told to scare dwarf chil-" I was interrupted by a thunderous trumpeting from outside that seemed to shake the earth itself.
I felt the blood drain out of my face.
But as the overseer of this fort, I don't have the luxury of being afraid -- I have a mission, and I will complete it. I forced myself to keep the fear out of my voice.
"Did they chase you?" I asked the shaking dwarf.
"No, ma'am, I don't think so. They didn't seem interested in coming after me."
"Alright, let's hope they stay away. When the elves leave, we'll have to seal the fortress again -- we don't want them getting in."
6 Hematite, 1058:Attention, dwarves of Whiskeybridle: from this day forth, any dwarf not clean-shaven shall be thrown to the elephants. Any dwarf not deemed sufficiently productive shall be thrown to the elephants. Any dwarf actively engaged in sedition against my rule shall be thrown to the elephants. Have a nice day.
- DuckThatQuacks, Overseer
9 Hematite, 1058:It seems that the dwarves' motivational problems have evaporated. Nothing like good motivation for producing results.
10 Hematite, 1058:The elves announced that they would be leaving soon, so we finally got around to trading with them. We gave them several piles of knick-knacks in exchange for wood, food, and drinks.
23 Malachite, 1058:The otherwise calm summer has been interrupted by a grim event:
I wonder what's so interesting about the caverns that they attract so many ancient horrors.
28 Galena, 1058:Work continues to proceed smoothly. The men are getting used to doing without their beards. Things are so much nicer now. However, our numbers are few, and our policy of splendid isolation means that no migrants will be coming from the mountainhomes. We'll have to do something about that -- perhaps during the next season.
Another uneventful season. I guess that's what happens when you have thirteen dwarves in a hermetically sealed fort.
Also, rather than risk encountering weird bugs in version .17, I'll just stick with .16 for the remainder of my turn.