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[Edosurist]

Try setting the world parameters so that the temperature is the highest possible... ya. I'm sure a lot of people have done that.
Other than that, I tried digging into the side of a river (more like above it) so that I could have a path for the mechanisms of my waterwheel to pass through for a millstone. I did that, and an alligator crawled up, and killed the two miners. Two dorfs came to pick up the bodies and both died, then another came and died. Finally, I managed to forbid the bodies and clothes. Then, the mason threw a tantrum and threw a barrel at the carpenter (so ironic) KILLING HIM! Then, a cougar finished off the mason... ya. 

[davros]

My shortest fort was my first one, which starved to death midwinter due to me not understanding how farming worked.

EDIT

Oh wait no, my shortest fort was me embarking in a terrifying biome into the middle of an army of skeletal muskoxen. Three dwarves lived, but with no supplies, so I decided to just leave.

[Pukako]

Shortest fort involved the entire party embarking on the exact bit of geography that collapsed into the volcano straight after unpausing.

Created a bit of confusion, as I couldn't find the dwarves, who were surviving quite well 20 levels down and sinking, well, for a bit.  F1 only brought me to the site of the collapse, and I thought I just couldn't find the embark site.  Then 'You have found a magma sea', and it was all over.

Fun times.

[The Scout]

I counter with badger. Killed someone, hunter went crazy and pegged everyone to death with steel bolts. Badger then proceeds to maul beserk dwarf to death.

[jamesadelong]

My one involved a cave a canyon pass surrounded on both sides by a cliff and a pair of hydra.

[Kilroy the Grand]

"What's this red-orange lake thing? Should I not have breached it? Was that a bad thing? Why is this field burning?"

[Bleaktea]

My very first fortress.  I embarked on what I thought was a lush mountainside but was actually a featureless mud flat bordering on a desert.  No water, no trees, nothing but endless desolation and seven doomed dwarves.  I couldn't figure out how to dig down, but that wouldn't have helped anyway since this was before the addition of cavern layers.  I abandoned at that point, leaving them there to die, lost and alone.

I once deliberately embarked on a surface cavern entrance.  Turns out a hydra had the same idea and everyone was promptly eaten.

[Johuotar]

5min: Skeletal elephant attack.
10min: Suicide attack againgst goblin fort right after embark.
30min: Digged under the same goblin fort and levered it down.


Watching the goblins crawl in pain after the crash was fun.

[Ursicide]

My shortest fort was when I embarked in the (Louisiana) bayou and all seven dwarves got their limbs ripped off at the embark site by angry alligators.  One dwarf was left alive, but he couldn't do much because of his missing legs.

[ExdeathV]

Zombie Badgers and Carp. That is all.

[WillowLuman]

Instantly swarmed by FPS breaking giant mosquitos

[SirAaronIII]

Plop the wagon down next to the rivers. Then crocodiles (that were already on the map..) come out of the river and slay everyone.

[Sowelu]

"Okay!  I'm all set with my hyper-optimized embark.  No tools, but don't worry, the volcano and copper bars will help me get those right away."

...Volcano needs one Z-level of channeling to reach.  I have no pick.

"...Damn it."

(Okay, I realized after the fact that I could have used my wagon wood to get started...but still.)

[ASCIt]

Do the ones where I embark, check for slade quarries, then abandon in disappointment count?

[Llamainaspitfire]

One of the first times i played the game.
i had just figured the world map out.
had hit the quick start loadout.
And didn't know what the hell to do.
Abandoned it after a few minutes of confusion.