Stop thinking in equations. Think in functions instead: A function f is just a machine that associates to every number x some other number f(x). The function's derivative then is just another machine, associating to every number x some number f'(x). We can use the same idea even more generally and assign other objects to other objects too - there's an example in the next paragraph.
This may seem like a trivial difference, but it's really not: Equations are essentially just statements that some relation holds. Functions are independent mathematical objects, which we can work with without concerning ourselves with numbers. As an example, you could consider the process of derivation a
functionassociating to every (differentiable) function f its derivative f'.
To be more concrete: Your f' is a function just like f is. The equation y=4x-5 (actually you should write that as f'(x) = 4x - 5, but since you're doing a couple sort-of graphical arguments I guess y is fine as well) tells you what relationship there is between a number x and the number f'(x) assigned to it by the function f. The function itself is a distinct entity from the equation! You can see this by checking that y = 2^2 * x - 5, which is technically speaking a different equation, gives the same relationship.
f'(x) = m holds as long as you use the m calculated for that specific x. Since m depends on x - the slope of the tangent is not constant, after all - m is really a function, and it would be better to write f'(x) = m(x). But this basically just means that the two functions are the same, which is a more fancy way of saying derivative = slope of tangent.
If all that is too abstract for you, here's your concrete error: m is not fixed, but varies as x varies. f'(x) = m only holds as long as you're talking about the m calculated for that specific point.
Pseudo-edit: Damn ninjas getting in the way of my ranting... By the way, do tell me about pedagogical errors I'm making - I'll be tutoring some physicists next semester, and I want to improve my relevant skills.