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[eerr]

Considering the amount of anti-depressants, perhaps you act really wierd?

Maybe you don't talk with the guys enough?

Maybe you're not gay?

Who knows.

You can test for the talking thing by talking about stuff which isn't relevant at all.
If they steer you back on course and seem a little antsy about it you hit the mark. The sound of your own silence.

[Agdune]

Or you could, y'know, just not bother interacting with him, in preference to e-stalking him.

I've been having a non-social period of about a year now. I'm actually extremely happy about it TBH. I have a girlfriend who is fantastic, I enjoy my subject at university and am hugely improving my most cherished of skills, critical analysis. Why should I participate in what has for me, to date, been an aggravating, never ending, real life recreation of every $2 soap opera ever? Up untill the start of this year I invested huge amounts of effort into talking with friends, doing things they wanted to do and listening to their interpretations of the world. Then I met my girlfriend and was exposed to what it's like to not have to fight to get my point of view understood by people who think the moonlanding was faked, who think generalisations like homosexuality in males=femininity are accurate or people who have shit lives but just blame their problems on external factors and never get off their asses to change anything about either themselves or their situations.

I stopped bothering listening to my then friends, stopped bothering being nice and trying to maintain others' positive perceptions of me and became an anti-social recluse. Frankly, considering that I no longer have to play along with gossipy webs of intrigue, talk to people I find small-minded and ignorant, pretend to enjoy others shitty senses of humour, be supportive of people who are creating their own problems and no longer have to be generally pleasant and patient, I find I'm enjoying my life much more. I can focus so much more on fixing my own problems in life; I used to have fairly major depressive episodes once or twice a month because I wasn't really doing anything to challenge myself, just puttering along. Now I have maybe one minor depression a month and that's just because I've hit a challenge at school that I didn't just breeze through. Being happier and doing things *I* enjoy feels much easier when I'm not taking on other's burdens and am not considering what they think of me for my actions. I'll be as feminine, disdainful and aloof as I like, fuck their ill-considered values.

Of course, you might've noticed that little bit about the girlfriend and correctly concluded I'm not totally isolated. That would probably be even less mentally healthy than the whole 'taking on everyone's problems' thing. I look at it as a balancing thing: I still take on other's worries sometimes (or in the case of my girlfriend, often), but the fact that I don't give a shit about 95% of the people I interact with doesn't worry me. I'm not a dick to them, I'm still willing to offer help if it seems like someone needs it (I'm studying psychology after all), but I'm not here to please others, and I don't care if they think I'm a snobby know-it-all of ambiguous sexuality, because in the very end, fuck it. I'm much smarter than most of them and talking to them makes me bored and a little sad. If they were worth talking to to begin with, I wouldn't have stopped doing it.

[ed boy]

Seriously, the dude's name is Tyler. Of course he's an asshole. People named Tyler always are.

[ChairmanPoo]

[eerr]

Well of course I'm not telling him to be a pussy.

Listening=/= being someones bitch.

[MonkeyHead]

One of the best revelations i had in my mid teens (almost 15 yrs ago now) was that i didnt need anyone else if i didnt want them. almost overnight i went from the underachieving jackass who acted up to avoid being picked on to the scary kid who no-one messed with as he could and would hurt you, wasnt affected by what people said or the consequences of such an attitude. i stopped worrying if what i did affected people, and instead concerned myself only with if what i did took me closer to my end goal. i became a sucess at whatever i wanted to do, and didnt bother with anything i felt i didnt want to do. no social pressure is nice, and there is no way anyone can expect me to take sides other than my own in any situation. my parents and my brothers seem to understand - they know i will never be a hugger. possibly the best choice i have ever made. even to this day there are few people i bother with unless forced. this doesnt make me a sociophobe - i hold the veiwpoint that most other people are assholes that it is easier to dismiss than to make effort working them out. fast forwards 15 years and i have a small and close knit circle of freinds, a wife (who totally gets it. she knows why other people dont matter until they show worth to me), a good job/career, some sweet co-workers, 2 kids... hell, from the outside a "normal" life. but thats just it - in my head 99% of the population of the world could have never existed and it would make no difference to me. many who know of me consider me emotionally cold/stunted, arrogant, hell, even quite a narcisist, but honestly, why should i care about what the postman thinks about the car i drive? its just a lump of metal that gets me to work so i can earn, so i can keep a roof over my family and feed them - they are important. to me, what is in other peoples heads hardly is. of course, being able to switch emotions off and on might not be for everyone. you might not be suprised to find out I am a nihilist, and that my fave book/film is fight club.

but anyway, to the point. what matters most is what you think, what you feel, how you percieve the external stimuli your sensory apparatus perceives. i storngly reccomend acting based on those things alone and forgetting the rest of the whole steaming pile of shit that is "other people"

[nenjin]

Everyone needs to have at least one flip out session in high school. Justified rage is good for the soul.

Just be ready for the consequences.

[DJ]

Next time he insults you, spit on him and say "Bring it, bitch!". Violence is bad and all, but letting people push you around is even worse. And an honest fight is much better than creepy shit like e-stalking.

And is there a particular reason for upping your meds? You should gradually get off them, not become more reliant on them.

[ChairmanPoo]

Wow. With all the people telling him to dump his meds you'd almost think he's doing hash he bought in a trip to Marrakesh, instead of taking a prescription treatment under medical supervision. 

[DJ]

I don't see how hiding in a (pill) bottle is a good solution to one's problems. At best they should be an aid to proper psychiatrist treatment. Life is sometimes pain, yeah. But to get over it you need to confront it, not bury it. I've had more than my fair share of tough shit, I never resorted to meds and I got over it eventually.

[Eugenitor]

To all the people suggesting direct violence: Are you fucking serious? Even if the OP did beat his ass, what's to stop the OP from getting into serious trouble over it (kicked off the team, expelled, etc)- or stop the asshole from bringing a knife the next day?

Enough with the testosterone bullshit- save that for the actual game of football. The concept of a fair fight is retarded here. The purpose is to get rid of him without anything happening to you in the process. If he has any chance of defending against what you're doing to him, you're doing it wrong.

[Vector]

And is there a particular reason for upping your meds? You should gradually get off them, not become more reliant on them.

Not that I know much about anti-depressants, but what I've heard is that one is generally supposed to go on a treatment cycle for a year or two until one's brain remembers how to self-regulate, and then taper off.

And yeah, this is between him and his physician, not him and those who distrust the medical profession.


Personally, I just wouldn't worry about it all, man.  Not to the point of thinking "other people" are a steaming pile of shit, but if you don't feel like socializing, then just don't socialize beyond everyday politeness.  It's one of those things that comes and goes, so I wouldn't worry too much.

If you think it might be a result of your upped meds, then I'd try to keep talking to your mental health people as the situation develops.  It could be a side effect, or it could just be one of those normal mood-changing things.


And, as far as the jerk goes: just keep cool and be nice to him.  It's always worked for me.

[smjjames]

Well, if the guy is on the same team as you, then that would be a problem for everybody involved, right? You should talk to your coach about it.

[ChairmanPoo]

I don't see how hiding in a (pill) bottle is a good solution to one's problems. At best they should be an aid to proper psychiatrist treatment.

HeLLO! The pills *are* a proper psychiatric treatment.

Life is sometimes pain, yeah. But to get over it you need to confront it, not bury it. I've had more than my fair share of tough shit, I never resorted to meds and I got over it eventually.

Again, you persist in making statements to the order of those medications being a vice, instead of something that a doctor thought necessary to prescribe him

[smjjames]

I don't see how hiding in a (pill) bottle is a good solution to one's problems. At best they should be an aid to proper psychiatrist treatment.

HeLLO! The pills *are* a proper psychiatric treatment.

Life is sometimes pain, yeah. But to get over it you need to confront it, not bury it. I've had more than my fair share of tough shit, I never resorted to meds and I got over it eventually.

Again, you persist in making statements to the order of those medications being a vice, instead of something that a doctor thought necessary to prescribe him

He has a point though, the OP should at least see a counselor or someone he can talk to and get the feelings off his chest. Then again, some people are simply emotionally fragile for whatever reason.