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Author Topic: I have seen the truth...  (Read 1814 times)

Man of Paper

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I have seen the truth...
« on: September 24, 2010, 01:02:09 pm »

We, as humans, have an elf trying to disguise itself as a dwarf trying to disguise itself as a human among us.
Think for a moment. Who is the most annoying, useless person on the planet? After we all pictured our exes, the next image to pop into our heads is likely to be this:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Does it make sense now? I mean, look at it. There's no way that's human. So the next logical step is dwarf, right? Well, that's all fine and dandy until you realize three things: It has no beard, doesn't do any work, and can't hold it's alcohol. The only way it resembles something with the mindset of a dwarf is one thing: greed.
Now Dwarves are greedy, sure. That comes with the territory. I'm sure mining all that spoilerite gives them the right. But they don't impose restrictions on any other economies. Who does that? The Elves! Many people think that the Elves are tree-hugging hippies that don't want you cutting down trees for ecological reasoning. Well then, why is everything of theirs made of wood? If the Dwarves don't produce wood goods, people will turn to the Elves. They are trying to monopolize wood production, not halt it!  They are greedy creatures, such as this "Snooki" beast. The Dwarven hatred for the Elves, if not justified before (it was), certainly can be now.



The crap I come up with in the shower...
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nil

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #1 on: September 24, 2010, 01:08:25 pm »

no way she has a -1 damblock tho, she took that punch like a champ

Urist Imiknorris

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #2 on: September 24, 2010, 10:55:33 pm »

She's secretly a kobold impersonating an elf impersonating a dwarf impersonating a human.
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thvaz

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #3 on: September 24, 2010, 11:45:55 pm »

There is no way that's human? I hope you are just trying to be funny, even if you completely failed.



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Brandon816

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #4 on: September 24, 2010, 11:57:40 pm »

...
It has no beard, doesn't do any work, and can't hold it's alcohol.
...

I lol'd at this. Although I kind of disagree with you. If it doesn't do any work and believes they deserve more than everyone else for no visible reason, it's probably a noble.

Now then, no matter what race it is, we can all agree that it is very annoying because it is a noble, and it must die based on principle alone. I propose using magma.
« Last Edit: September 25, 2010, 12:00:23 am by Brandon816 »
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NKDietrich

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #5 on: September 25, 2010, 12:09:55 am »

It's the Goblin equivalent of a Noble.
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subject name here

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #6 on: September 25, 2010, 12:53:47 am »

i don't get it

Capntastic

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #7 on: September 25, 2010, 01:06:17 am »

A magma blowout
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NKDietrich

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #8 on: September 25, 2010, 02:04:18 am »

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MarcAFK

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #9 on: September 25, 2010, 02:17:02 am »

EWait, what? Is she some kind of minor celebrity from some obscene 'reality tv' program' i a lucky enough to have not been exposed to?
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They're nearly as bad as badgers. Build a couple of anti-buzzard SAM sites marksdwarf towers and your fortress will look like Baghdad in 2003 from all the aerial bolt spam. You waste a lot of ammo and everything is covered in unslightly exploded buzzard bits and broken bolts.

Kelbin

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #10 on: September 25, 2010, 02:26:15 am »

... Somethings wrong...

Well, look at that!
That arm! That can't be human!!!

I'd say it's a goblin. It's rather too short and too thick to be a elf.
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Murphy

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #11 on: September 25, 2010, 03:01:12 am »

I don't get it at all.
Whoever the person in the picture might me, she looks like an ordinary human.
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breadbocks

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #12 on: September 25, 2010, 03:22:15 am »

I don't get it at all.
Whoever the person in the picture might me, she looks like an ordinary human.
From what I can tell, she looks pretty damn short.
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Clearly, cakes are the next form of human evolution.

NKDietrich

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #13 on: September 25, 2010, 04:08:29 am »

I don't get it at all.
Whoever the person in the picture might me, she looks like an ordinary human.

That's what they want you to think.
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Creamcorn

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Re: I have seen the truth...
« Reply #14 on: September 25, 2010, 11:42:39 am »

The chick is called snooki or something. She's from some U.S. based reality T.V. show called Jersey Shore. The show revolves around the "real events" of some random group of individuals who like to refer to themselves as guedos or something.

TL;DR. It's another product of MTV
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