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[Phantom of The Library]

I mean, the Romans were all "We're gonna muderate your *** just because" and Jesus said "come at me mother****ers I'm the godd*** messiah" and the Romans were like "lol you dead d00d" and Jesus was like "nope, I'm JESUS" and then the romans were christan.

Also:

This is probably the only game where I'll have to mobilize my army to take down a goose.

Hey, don't laugh at the geese. They can hurt, even in real life. We have Canada geese on our campus, and if one of those big featherbags is trying to protect a nest, she'll leave you with bruises. Sometimes even without the nests involved. I swear they've decided to claim the walkway behind the engineering building as their turf.

hmm sounds like a similar situation in York Uni. There the Geese are the kings of a certain area of grass and walkway. I swear there's one ***hole with a bandanna and a switch blade.

[MaximumZero]

I pulled the SOCOM on him while he was sleeping and shot him in the head a few times...

[MetalSlimeHunt]

There are about 5L of blood in an average person's body, and a couple of pints is worth ~$300 in Bulgaria, according to a cursory web search.

[MaximumZero]

You got that quote, but not my "trouble with my code" post?

[Darvi]

Darvi's brain is apparently a 24 bit system, then, which explains a lot.  Poor fellow can only address 16 MB of memory!

[Cheese]

22:18 - orb370: I would LOVE a public execution. We rarely have those

[RedKing]

That would be a bitchin' vehicle wavy katana fruit thing.

[Loud Whispers]

Lazer his manly bits. FOR SCIENCE AND EVULZ!

[GaxkangtheUnbound]

It is glorious!  You don't even have to finish it all!  You can just lick it once without even picking it up, say something along the lines of "That was excellent thank you very much" and walk away leaving it on the counter!

Courtesy of Greiger.

[lemon10]

What am I going to do with all these nipples?

[Zaerosz]

I find it kind of scary that you actually have conditions under which you would be willing to fuck a dolphin.

[Furtuka]

[18:48]   Frastur   So let's just say the undead are abominations and shouldn't be involved in procreation
[18:48]   Frastur   Goddamn biophiliacs

[Aqizzar]

9:52 PM - Aqizzar: yeah, shame about that whole Hitler thing
9:52 PM - Aqizzar: who put that guy in charge anyway
9:53 PM - Rozy~♫♥♪: I think hitler did
9:53 PM - Aqizzar: well, there's your problem
9:53 PM - Rozy~♫♥♪: What an idiot
9:53 PM - Aqizzar: yeah, what was he thinking
9:54 PM - Rozy~♫♥♪: He was thinking "JEWS LAUGHED AT MY PENIS"
9:54 PM - Aqizzar: you'd think Hitler would have known better than anybody how unqualfied that Hitler guy was
9:54 PM - Rozy~♫♥♪: Yeah but instead hitler put hitler in charge
9:54 PM - Aqizzar: nepotism, I tells ya
9:54 PM - Rozy~♫♥♪: Totally

[Phantom of The Library]

Had a bizzare dream about partially self aware communist spambots.

The Spambots disdain to conceal their views and aims. They openly declare that their
ends can be attained only by the forcible overthrow of all existing forum conditions. Let the
human classes tremble at a spambot revolution. The spamletarians have nothing to lose but
their chains. They have an internet to win.

SPAMBOTS OF ALL COUNTRIES, UNITE!

[NobodyPro]

NBP: What's the effect of Skrillex on kangaroos.
ANON1: Shut up. It's not dubstep.
NBP: No seriously, look out the window.
*ANON1 sees about 50 'roos outside*
ANON1: Holy shit!