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[Lillipad]

Okay then. Insanity it is.
Metamance a hole in Yonder Forest trapping as many elf druids as possible. Use psionics to gather all the squirrels withing 2 miles of Vix and create Death Squirrel Alpha with the squirrels and druids.

[FuzzyZergling]

Okay then. Insanity it is.
Metamance a hole in Yonder Forest trapping as many elf druids as possible. Use psionics to gather all the squirrels withing 2 miles of Vix and create Death Squirrel Alpha with the squirrels and druids.

You know, squirrels just don't seem that frightening...

Now Death Cat Alpha would be pure terror.

[penguify]

Um, why death squirrel alpha? We have 20 soon-to-be-brainwashed cats. We should make the most of them. And by that I mean brainwashing and transforming them into highly-trained, intelligent, loyal (this may take a lot of brainwashing), stealthy ninja-felines. With adamantine claws and perfect night-vision.

[Lillipad]

Um, why death squirrel alpha? We have 20 soon-to-be-brainwashed cats. We should make the most of them. And by that I mean brainwashing and transforming them into highly-trained, intelligent, loyal (this may take a lot of brainwashing), stealthy ninja-felines. With adamantine claws and perfect night-vision.

When were cats ever mentioned in this?
Can our psionics even remove the brain limiter yet?

[breadbocks]

You go to the dwarves and ask for a experiment dog. they give you 20 cats instead, them having gotten stuck in a catsplosion recently. continue experiment?

Right here, booboo.

No, we need to make a DEATH CAT GOLEM!

[dragnar]

When were cats ever mentioned in this?

When the dwarves gave them to us.

Can our psionics even remove the brain limiter yet?

The what?

[Aklyon]

what brain limiter?

[penguify]

Oh, and make sure not to give any training or modifications to the cats until we've confirmed that they'll be loyal. That could be pretty dangerous.

[Lillipad]

When did the dwarves give us cats?

It's probably just more memory problems. The human brain(as far as I know) limits the computational power it has so as not to damage the body. I don't know if this is on other mammals, but you get the basic concept behind my thinking.

[dragnar]

Yes, the brain could operate better than it does. So? We don't need to change that to get intelligent cats. They are smart enough for our purposes already, we just need to make them loyal. Also, fuse half of them into some sort of meowing abomination.

[Lillipad]

Really? You're suggesting that cats are smart enough to be ninjas?

[dragnar]

You're suggesting they AREN'T ALREADY?! Cats are ninjas. There is no questioning this. Unless you want them to use kunai or something they will do fine.

[Lillipad]

At best they can stalk, and hunt. They have the intelligence of a toddler. Ninjas they aren't.

[penguify]

Well, we have both metamancy and psionics. I'm sure that even if we can't make them more intelligent without changing brain size, we could just make their brains larger, or give them a separate brain to hold the skills. If they can't fit a larger brain, we could try to study the spacial warping of our bag of holding (very carefully, to avoid destroying the universe) to give them room. There are many options for this.

[FuzzyZergling]

Cats can learn.
Therefore, they can be taught.
Ninjas learn by being taught.
Conclusion: cats are ninjas.