Match TwoMaple Willow Aspen and Gutstabberson, son of Gutstabber versus Special K and TinyManagers Mysteriousbluepuppet, Howells, Prepaid Lenin, and calrogman"So, Olon, what've we got today?"
"Well, Urist, it's the second day of the tourney, and things are heating up!"
"Fantastic. Why don't you tell our viewers about this next matchup?"
"We've got an interesting match today, Urist. On the left side, we have the
elf Dwarf Hippy, Maple Willow Aspen! He may be a traitor to our race, but he's got a lotta love for everyone... and a silver whip! Looming beside him is the gigantic Minotaur, Gutstabberson, son of Gutstabber! I gotta tell you, his dad made an amazing showing in the last tournament. Will Gutstabberson make Gutstabber proud?"
"I don't know about that, Olon, I'm liking the odds on these guys. Special K, that little kobold over there, he's pretty nifty with his axe. He may be going in unarmored, but if you can lop off the other guy's head off first, it doesn't matter how much armor you're wearing. And
his partner, Tiny the Minotaur, with a huge warhammer made out of platinum! Say, how much is that thing worth?"
"More than you make in a month, Urist. So let's see if it proves to be the deal-sealer in this fight!"
Special K darts forward just as the bell rings, lashing out with an axe that is almost his size. His strike proves true, and disarms Maple Willow Aspen in a flash, sending his right arm flying away. Clearly, however, Maple Willow Aspen is on something, and he ignores what has to be
horrendous pain and lashes Tiny the Minotaur in the leg. In a strange exchange of opponents, Gutstabberson makes his first attack of the match - at Special K. Bellowing fiercely, he gutstabs the kobold in the side with his massive pike, knocking the poor little guy over. Tiny makes his own charge at Maple Willow Aspen, but it appears all that investment in shiny armor was in vain, for he misses his strike entirely as the Dwarf Hippy dances out of reach and parries his second blow.
From this point on, the fight belongs entirely to Team 1. Gutstabberson begins to methodically pick Special K apart, at one point cutting off his hand with a neat thrust to the wrist, while Maple Willow Aspen demonstrates a cultural treasure, the Yuktobanian Whip Dance. This is a refined art form that requires years of practice. It involves whipping the crap out of your opponent until he can't move.
With a well-placed strike, the Dwarf Hippy paralyzes Tiny for the rest of his very short life. Gutstabberson leaves Special K and proceeds to do what he does best, to Tiny. The fight ends in a hail of whip and pike blows.
Winner: Maple Willow Aspen and Gutstabber, son of Gutstabber!"An instant classic, Olon! Amazing!"
"I got minotaur brain on me."
Special K hacks Maple Willow Aspen in the right upper arm with his steel battle axe and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the right lower leg with his silver whip, bruising the muscle!
Gutstabberson charges at Special K from the side!
Special K looks surprised by the ferocity of Gutstabberson's onslaught!
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the upper body from the side with his bronze pike, tearing the muscle, shattering the right true rib and tearing apart the left lung!
A tendon in the right true rib has been torn!
Special K is having trouble breathing!
Gutstabberson collides with Special K!
Special K is knocked over and tumbles backward!
Tiny charges at Maple Willow Aspen!
Tiny attacks Maple Willow Aspen but He jumps away!
Tiny strikes at Maple Willow Aspen but the shot is parried!
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the lower body from the side with his bronze pike, tearing the muscle and tearing the guts!
Special K looks sick!
The bronze pike has lodged firmly in the wound!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the right lower leg with his silver whip, bruising the muscle!
Tiny strikes at Maple Willow Aspen but the shot is parried!
Gutstabberson twists the embedded bronze pike around in Special K's lower body!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the lower body with his silver whip, bruising the muscle and bruising the guts through the leather mail!
Tiny looks sick!
Tiny attacks Maple Willow Aspen but He jumps away!
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the lower body from the side with his bronze pike, tearing the muscle and tearing the guts!
An artery has been opened by the strike!
Special K looks even more sick!
The Special K stands up.
Gutstabberson charges at Special K!
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the right hand with his bronze pike and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Gutstabberson collides with Special K!
Special K is knocked over and tumbles backward!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the upper body with his silver whip, bruising the muscle and chipping the upper spine's bone and bruising the nervous tissue through the leather mail!
The Tiny loses hold of the platinum war hammer.
The Tiny falls over.
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the upper body with his bronze pike, tearing the muscle and tearing apart the upper spine's nervous tissue!
A tendon in the upper spine has been torn!
The Special K loses hold of the steel battle axe.
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the right lower leg with his bronze pike, fracturing the bone!
A ligament has been torn and a tendon has been torn!
The bronze pike has lodged firmly in the wound!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the right lower leg with his silver whip, chipping the bone!
Gutstabberson twists the embedded bronze pike around in Special K's right lower leg!
The Special K is no longer stunned.
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the lower body with his bronze pike, tearing apart the muscle and tearing apart the lower spine's nervous tissue!
An artery has been opened by the strike!
A tendon in the lower spine has been torn!
Gutstabberson stabs Special K in the left upper arm with his bronze pike and the severed part sails off in an arc!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the upper body with his silver whip, bruising the muscle and chipping the right true rib through the leather mail!
Special K has bled to death.
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the left lower leg with his silver whip, chipping the bone!
Gutstabberson stabs Tiny in the left hand with his bronze pike, fracturing the bone through the leather gauntlet!
A ligament has been torn and a tendon has been torn!
Tiny misses Maple Willow Aspen!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the lower body with his silver whip, bruising the muscle and bruising the guts through the leather mail!
Gutstabberson stabs Tiny in the left upper arm from the side with his bronze pike, chipping the bone through the leather mail!
A motor nerve has been severed and a tendon has been torn!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the lower body with his silver whip, bruising the muscle and bruising the stomach through the leather mail!
Gutstabberson stabs Tiny in the lower body from the side with his bronze pike, tearing the muscle and tearing the stomach through the leather mail!
Maple Willow Aspen lashes Tiny in the head with his silver whip, bruising the muscle, jamming the skull through the brain and tearing the brain!
Tiny has been knocked unconscious!
Tiny has been struck down.
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Topic: The Bay12 DF Gladiator Challenge Tag Tournament #2: Championships! (Read 49250 times)