Well after four more hours of work I think this is really good.
This story is one about the God of Earth one of the most caring gods there was his name was Kain, and he was called The Shield for The Weak. He is father of the dwarves, and the Golems, but he was also the Father of a grand race. He treated his creations with love unlike many other gods. Now let us begin.
When I was born my first thought was “I must make something to be my child." and so I Kain the Shield for the Weak created a goal to make many creations, and they would be my children for me to love and care for. My first creations were the dwarves a short, stout, and hopeful race.
They were my first children and I loved them, and protected them for as long as I could. They loved me to, and we lived in peace for many years. I knew that someday I would meet another god or goddess that would wish to change my creations, and I knew that I would let them for they needed to change and move beyond my protective grasp to ever truly become free from me.
The first goddess I met was unique and none would be like her for at that moment I felt a feeling gods do not usually feel. The feeling I felt was love I do not know why, but this goddess I loved for some reason beyond my reach I wished for her to live with me, and watch over my children alongside me. Just as swiftly as she arrived she left and my next creation arises the Golems, they were magnificent creations, and unique beyond all else, but the dwarves. Yes they were just mindless guards, but I made them that way because one day they would be my strongest soldier in a war that involved all the gods in this world.
In the end nothing mattered for the life energy of the Great Goddess drained away, and as I lay there dying my last thought was of that goddess who would never know the way I felt, and how my children would never again have me to protect them.
Before me were the elders of the dwarf race, and as I died I saw tears fall down their faces. The power began to drain out of me, and I knew I had little time left so to my children the last words I spoke were “Goodbye my children I loved you remember that always for it will give you power beyond that of others, and the power you will feel is hope, and love. I leave you now, but someday I will return in a moment of when your race is about to die I will return and with my last breath I will save you. The cost for this act will be my life, but I care not for you I love beyond all else, but one, and she dies with me today.”, and with that the earth engulfed him and deep in to the Womb was I thrust until I came to the home of the goddess. There I died the last thing I saw was the one I loved. That is the story of our Father Kain.
There was an elderly dwarf now standing in front of a fire which was surrounded by many dwarf children. The old man stood there a while and then said “One day we will see him again that is what we wait for, and that is what we shall always wait for.” No dwarf would ever know that their father loved another more than them.
Thus the story of the dwarf father Kain, the only god to ever show true loves to his creations ends, but he will never be forgotten for he left behind a strong people the dwarves, and their guardians the Golems. May he rest in peace with the other gods who have died for the life of the Overgoddess has faded away, and with it went the gods.
I think this is a little better if were looking on comma's:
This story is one about the God of Earth, one of the most caring gods there was, his name was Kain, and he was called The Shield for The Weak. He is father of the dwarves, and the Golems, but he was also the Father of a grand race. He treated his creations with love unlike many other gods. Now, let us begin.
When I was born, my first thought was “I must make something to be my child." and so I, Kain the Shield for the Weak created a goal to make many creations, and they would be my children for me to love and care for. My first creations were the dwarves, a short, stout, and hopeful race.
They were my first children and I loved them, and protected them for as long as I could. They loved me too, and we lived in peace for many years. I knew that someday I would meet another god or goddess that would wish to change my creations, and I knew that I would let them for they needed to change and move beyond my protective grasp to ever truly become free from me.
The first goddess I met was unique and none would be like her, for at that moment I felt a feeling gods do not usually feel. The feeling I felt was love, I do not know why, but this goddess I loved for some reason beyond my reach I wished for her to live with me, and watch over my children alongside me. Just as swiftly as she arrived she left and my next creation arises, the Golems, they were magnificent creations, and unique beyond all else, but the dwarves. Yes, they were just mindless guards, but I made them that way because one day they would be my strongest soldier in a war that involved all the gods in this world.
In the end, nothing mattered for the life energy of the Great Goddess drained away, and as I lay there dying, my last thought was of that goddess who would never know the way I felt, and how my children would never again have me to protect them.
Before me were the elders of the dwarf race, and as I died I saw tears fall down their faces. The power began to drain out of me, and I knew I had little time left, so to my children the last words I spoke were “Goodbye my children, I loved you remember that always for it will give you power beyond that of others, and the power you will feel is hope, and love. I leave you now, but someday I will return in a moment of when your race is about to die, I will return, and with my last breath I will save you. The cost for this act will be my life, but I care not for you I love beyond all else, but one, and she dies with me today.”, and with that, the earth engulfed him and deep into the Womb was I thrust until I came to the home of the goddess. There I died the last thing I saw was the one I loved. That is the story of our Father Kain.
There was an elderly dwarf now standing in front of a fire which was surrounded by many dwarf children. The old man stood there a while and then said “One day we will see him again, that is what we wait for, and that is what we shall always wait for.” No dwarf would ever know that their father loved another more than them.
Thus the story of the dwarf father Kain, the only god to ever show true love to his creations ends, but he will never be forgotten for he left behind a strong people, the dwarves, and their guardians, the Golems. May he rest in peace with the other gods, who have died for the life of the Overgoddess has faded away, and with it went the gods.
I corrected something like 15 places where there could probably be comma's, tell me if some of them were wrong.