We fled Graspedseduce in our wagons by the hundreds. Women, children, cats, keets and pet alpacas, we came shivering across the Plains of Ooze fleeing the ruin and mad wrath of the demon-queen Led Shakeoars. Many of our brothers and sisters had risen in rebellion against the excesses of the Mad Queen, and many and more were cut down by her cult and their terrible servants. I will never forget the sounds or sights of the night wolves tore apart the dwarves of Graspedseduce, their bodies all of salt, reeking of gore and brimstone.
After this, somehow fleeing to the fortress of Failcannon sounded like a good idea. I will attempt to chronicle herein the folly that ensued.
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Journal of 'Catalyst' - Elven Studies MajorWe recognized Failcannon by its famous sculptural masterpeice - truly, nothing in the history of our art has better expressed the Dwarven condition.
Stranger monuments awaited us within the gates. It would appear that the only material more abundant than gold at Failcannon is goblins. The dwarfs who received me proudly showed me the enormous spider statue, and explained its construction.
I thanked them for the nightmares I would be having for the next month, and declined an explanation of the other structure across the yard, built of a distinctly
different type of bone. I decided I might be better not knowing.
I was immediately struck by the sad state of fortress - a population of a mere 28 dwarves in the entire vast structure, itself in terrible disarray. Worse, though, were the dwarves themselves. One can scarce find a sane and whole dwarf in the entire place - and IF you do, they are most likely one of the many grim, heavily-armed, hardened killers stalking the halls and ready to fill you with bolts at the first sign of discontent. When we arrived, we had apparently just missed our chance to witness the glory of Dwarven Justice in action.
It was clearly an epic battle that took place, starting with Greader, Tabul, and the Chronicler Takua. It all took place next to the huge and surely very-efficient corpse-and-food stockpile.
In the course of things, Takua took quite a beating, yet still stayed on his feet. Meanwhile others in the fort got involved, including some fellow calling himself Andreus the "Timeless Mage", stepped in to pepper Greader with shots, and one child caught in the crossfire.
Strangely, this encounter did not last long, as all the dwarves went back to their respective business shortly thereafter. Except in Andreus's case, where that business was apparently taking potshots at anyone who happened to be nearby, regardless of whether they were, say, crippled in a hospital bed.
The fight soon spilled to involve an Alchemist named Grov trading shots with Andreus as well, as That Aussie Dwarf slunk off somewhere after suffering one ineffectual potshot. A soldier named Elt intervened and Andreus soon found himself in dire straits.
As Andreus dragged himself around the floor of the statue garden, apparently intent on painting the floor bright red, as his last act on earth, a one-handed cheesemaker, Strategia, decided to join in on the shooting gallery.
I have yet to understand exactly why Andreus was targetted. I have heard some nonsense about "his sins from past lives" but surely I have misunderstood.
Greader, of course, continued his rampage, this time pursuing the !!Scientist!! Uristein, while EmeraldWind pursued several others, inflicting minor injuries on each. Greader retired for the night, apparently feeling that a good day's work had been done. Meanwhile that night, 'Dete' succumbed to an infected wound, presumable unrelated to the scratch that Greader had just given him, and the soldier Elt exacted retribution on EmeraldWind for the chaos that had been carried out largely by Greader. Both are Stoneworkers by trade, so I can understand the confusion.
Yet, I find it odd that there is so little distinction between "dwarven justice" and "taking potshots at your fellow dwarves for sport". I guess the list of dwarves in need of punishment in this place is actually longer than the job queue and the current population roster, combined.
Apparently the 5th death was a dwarf named Sinpwn - he died in his bed of thirst, it would seem. The doctors here are apparently too overburdened to care for all the injured. I hope I am up to the task of setting this right, but the task of bringing order to this fortress will be much like selling toothpicks to elves.
It did not take long for the slaughter to resume. Strategia shot down a cat, and soon engaged the militia captain, Mormota, in combat as well. She seems to be tough, for a one-handed cheesemaker, and it was captain Mormota who hit the ground fainting from pain soon enough. Strategia continued her rampage across the fort, leaving Mormota unconscious, injuring several and shooting down the soldier Vee with a few well placed bolts.
As she continued to plunk arrows into the various citizens of Failcannon, the guard finally decided this was the time to spring into action. Moments later, Strategia lay dead. Elsewhere, Ahriman decided to now continue what seems to have been a long-running rampage, and struck down Scaraban so quickly it seemed almost incidental. DuckThatQuacks then intervened and quickly put an end to Ahriman's rampage with his deadly battleax, then quickly sprinted to the aid of the injured PAINBRINGER against Elt the soldier, who also succumbed to the deadly ax. DuckThatQuacks descended, moments later, upon the Chronicler Takua, who, since his initial injury in these riots some weeks ago, had laid injured and unconscious in a stockpile. Things looked grim for Takua, but it was then that Urist Imiknorris awoke, and with his famous spear "Tuftedfatal, the Roughness of Roaring" laid into DuckthatQuacks, soon chasing him through the hallways, soaked in blood. DuckThatQuacks fled down the stairs, into the bowels of the earth, only to come screaming out again the instant Urist gave up pursuit. The axe made quick work, and the heroic speardwarf fell.
Eleven dwarfs lay dead already, and the madness had not yet run its course. Meanwhile, a new forgotten beast made its presence known deep below... but I think even it feared to come above.
I have heard in hushed whispers this ongoing madness was somehow caused by the Demon Queen Led... but I know not how. Could it be that the rebellion continues in this place, her agents lurking among the brave dwarfs of Failcannon? Or is something more sinister, more...
occult at play... This all took place before my arrival, so I have little to go on... and it seems there is no one here I dare trust.
I must learn the truth of it, and soon, or we may all be doomed.
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Holy hell, it is madness in here. I apologize for the long-winded reporting, but it all seemed a little too significant to skim over. I can't even figure out who is killing who or why, or who is on what side. I'd look for which dwarves are guards and which are criminals, but they are ALL criminals, and they are ALL military! I've never seen a tantrum spiral quite like this before - I've lost over a quarter of the already meager population and its only been about two months -- and I haven't even had migrants yet to dorf myself!Quite seriously, if this keeps getting worse and it looks like I'm not going to be able to keep the fort alive, I'd rather pass it on to someone who might stand a snowball's chance of saving it rather than have it self-destruct pathetically in my incompetent hands.
Hope you've enjoyed the update! :>
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Topic: FailCannon: No Rest for the Wicked (or anyone else) (Succession: Battlefailed 2) (Read 940072 times)