Bwaha. Who would have guessed it would have been the early trysts with a Bishop that led to me taking all Lombardy? I had two daughters (who were born before I even took control of this character), and amazingly, I realized this bishop was the youngest son of a Lombard King. I was all set to push my daughter-in-law's claim, but obviously, that would have been problematic because I wouldn't actually take Lombardy that way.
(Quick unrelated note: "Jesus gives Military Advice" is absolutely mad. +20 martial?!? I have a total of 50 martial right now. 9 base, +5 from Genius, +2 from Brave, +3 from Cruel +9 from Brilliant Strategist, +2 from Brawny, -1 from Slothful, and a whopping +20 from Jesus. 122.5% Morale offense, 87.5% Morale defense, and +70% in Plains, Steppes, and Farmlands. And +5 Personal Combat skill while we're at it. My Intrigue is also stupidly high, but that's because almost every bad trait gives you intrigue, and I got a hell of a lot of bad traits).
And I was looking through, desperately searching for a male claimant before the Lombard king recovered from his Consumption or died. But then I realized: that Bishop had an inheritable claim! If he died, my first-born daughter would be open. Well it turns out he was remarkably unpopular, and some subtle manipulations later and I'm gloriously pressing my first-born's claim. Lombardy never stood a chance. Another piece of good news is people have started to forget about my massive tyranny earlier, so my vassals don't all hate me and everything I stand for.
...But I now have a new problem. My vassal issue is about to explode. Almost all of Italy is composed of lords and such, and almost the whole lot of them are Feudal, not Viceroys. Meaning they all hate my guts, and it's gonna be hard to take it from them without incurring a million years Tyranny (I'm an Elective Monarchy, so I can't just totally ignore them and revoke everything, because they'll vote some Bulgarian idiot into power if they hate me too much). In the immediate term, my daughter has Lombardy, and I won't be able to fix anything until I take the Kingdom title from her, but if I do that my vassals will hate me. My daughter loves me too much to plot or anything (and I'd like to keep it that way if possible), so unless I personally somehow get a claim on the title I have issues.
The other issue is a lot more fun: I'm now only three duchies away from reforming Rome, and only one from the Pentarchy. Two of the duchies are Antioch and Jerusalem, both missing one county. The other, though, is the Pope. How does one conquer the Pope? I need to conquer the Pope. I'm
this close to reforming Rome as the Antichrist, and all that stands in my way is the Pope, the Emir of Galilee, and the Sheikh of Archa. Most of the (muslim) Middle East has coalesced behind the new Caliphate, the Shiites, and the Sultan of Africa (whom I just realized owns no land in Africa whatsoever, and in fact I will be able to usurp that title as soon as my gold goes over 200), but fortunately none of them stand in my way unless I Holy War for the remaining land. So close.
Also in my current game i finally got my first immortal character (ironman) . He only lasted like 20 years after getting the trait though, died at 70 to an assassination.
I keep expecting my demon spawn to get instantly killed by sex or something. Losing an Immortal character is probably worse though; I didn't even really do anything to get a Demonspawn, while Immortality is a really hard event to pull off and super risky. I'd be really pissed if my Immortal didn't live past like, 200.