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[Mictlantecuhtli]

... That is the most disturbing mental image I've ever conjured.

[Loud Whispers]

Jesus Christ!

[Descan]

I want to read that fanfic/alt-history.

The love of the two most powerful men in Christendom, mending the tear in the faith.

With their penises.

[Dutchling]

I want to read that fanfic/alt-history.

The love of the two most powerful men in Christendom, mending the tear in the faith.

With their penises.

"Bartolomew wishes Francis would stop trying to Pray away the Gay every night after they make love"

[Loud Whispers]

Well something rather interesting happened. I've been trying to find a way to take over the Night's Watch for quite some time, but no matter how many claims I've made I've never been able to actually find a way to declare war on them.
Then the Lord Commander died, leaving control of the Night's Watch to a Black Brother who originated from one of the Iron Throne's colonies; a Westerman from Gomorosh called Ronnet. I requested that he become my vassal and after 14 days, he accepted. Now the Night's Watch is under my direct command; I can't gift them land still but I can control their armies and build on their land. I wonder if I will maintain my hold over them once the current Lord Commander dies.

*EDIT

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

It's not paranoia when the whole world really is out to get you.

*EDIT x2
Also a faceless man even offered to join me at the price of my firstborn; the Braavosi's services are not needed.

*EDIT x3
There are now multiple assassination plots on the Queen, ranging from floorboard gravity traps; explosive manure table, archery accident and poisoned wine.

[Fniff]

What the hell did the Queen do?

[Loud Whispers]

What the hell did the Queen do?

She was a cruel and lazy woman who had a great gift for insulting quite literally the entire world.

[Fniff]

Ever be such a douche that the entire world wants to murder you?

[Rolan7]

Known plots: 546
Game of Thrones~

[RedKing]

Got my Fenno-Estonian game up to about 1000 AD. One of the more interesting bits is that the Karling blob is perpetually fractured, and the Lombards became Italians, and then promptly converted to Orthodoxy. Almost all of Italy is Orthodox now, with the Pope desperately trying to hold out in Rome. Bavaria is also Orthodox. And Britain is mostly contested between Pictland and Brythionnad (Wales).


Has anybody else noticed that the AI doesn't seem to calculate for holy order troops, even if they're already on the map? I regularly have enemies run directly at my Sons of Kaleva doomstack and get shredded.

[Loud Whispers]

Wife #3 is on fire, the Capital City is on fire and now I have a wild dragon considering me its father. Success!

[Noel.se]

In my first ironman game I managed to go from count to King of Ireland (altough Scottland still controlles one County). This game is loads of fun. The diplomacy skill is is incredible, I once had a state diplomacy of 45. Keeping my realm together was ridiculously easy. Oh, and my last king (nicknamed "the fat") who was gluttonous and lustful married a 16 year old when he was 60.
Is absolute crown authority worth it?
What is a good way to expand once you control a whole kingdom?

[Chaoswizkid]

Once there's a bunch of heretics, either try to become heretic or stay catholic, depending on what everyone else is doing. If everyone is going catholic, go heretic and vice versa. This is to enable you to Holy War everyone else. The issue is that can become scary if anyone nearby is powerful enough to holy war you. If you want to expand into the Pagans, you'll need Military Organization (The tech that gives you + retinues) at around 4 I think, otherwise prepare your organs for the cheese grater that is attrition.
Depending on the year, you may also want to build up and get ready to go all-in on one of the Crusades and hope you get the most score.

[Bouchart]

Is absolute crown authority worth it?

If you have an empire-level title, you need absolute crown authority to change your administration from Feudal to Imperial.  If you have Imperial administration, you can lower your crown authority and still keep using Imperial administration.  The Byzantine empire has Imperial administration by default, at least in the 1066 start.

Other than that running absolute crown authority just angers vassals more than high for a relatively minor benefit.  For the most part I run either Low or Medium crown authority, but I like to use ultimogeniture.

[MDFification]

So... has anyone else found the strength of the Abbasid completely game-ruining?
I basically stopped playing Charlemagne after my first 4 games on it (one of which I brought to the very end) didn't see a single decadence revolt or successful independence revolt in the entire Caliphate. Also, the Caliphate inevitably crushed the Shias, steamrolled all the way across Northern Africa and the Byzantine Empire, and in one particularly memorable and horrifying case occupy central India as well.
So I moved on to the Old Gods, thinking that with more Muslim states the Caliphate would be weakened. So I start my first Republic game... and am horrified to realize the Abbasids have somehow ate every muslim state between Damascus and Rome and are about to come a knocking for my territories in Sicily.

It's just so bogus. They never, ever seem to suffer any permanent setbacks. They crush almost all other muslim polities (typically the only ones to escape are in Spain). Sunni winds up with 100% moral authority basically all the time since they almost never loose holy wars. The Shia get crushed every time. The Ilkhanate never makes significant headway.

I know that in its glory days, the Abbasid Caliphate was the single most powerful, stable and advanced country on Earth. But this is just too much.