Update: So we finally got little Christy-pants assassinated, but he had blown all the treasuries cash on mercs trying to stop a Norse raid on our capital (Oh the fucking irony) and just as he bought them the raiders left. Fuck.
But its all good. Once his non-infidel brother Ragnaar took the throne he brought about a hundred gold pieces with him. And the chick who ordered the assassination is now my spymaster. Awesome. My first order of business is to send 20 gold pieces to her, both for the good family tree trimming and the fact I REALLY don't want her pissed at me.
Its been quite awhile since all that, Ragnaar is totally incapable and infirm, but he had a good run of raiding and taking two counties from Mercia before losing a war in the north because I really expected more out of a prepared invasion, but it took so long that my mercs slowly bled the treasury dry, and I was woefully undermanned when the invasion deadline appeared. Ended up surrendering before any counties got taken or anything, but damn that was a clusterfuck.
So, lots happened. Secondary clusterfuck where Mercia took advantage of clusterfuck number 1 to do a double holy war to take Jorvik and Lancaster. For quite awhile I didn't see any options, until I realized Ragnaar was pretty much dead anyway so I just went tyrant and imprisoned/banished a count and his bishop. Because fuck that guy, was a holdover in Lincoln from Mercia, Catholic, and had tried to betray me anyway earlier (I had imprisoned and then ransomed him to himself
) then I bought the Scottish band with the 300 or so gold and whupped all their ass.
Right as I was accepting the second surrender, Ragnaar died. All hail....whatever the next guys name is. Anyway, accepted the second surrender, and turns out this new guy was off in the varangian guard, so he returned with 200 prestige and gold, which was awesome. Not to mention the extra martial from the trait
So I decided to use my epic merc band that is paid off until about the heat death of the universe to get some payback on Lothian, which is the name of the place that caused clusterfuck number 1. Oh, and I chose the "wants to become exalted" ambition. That will be important later.
So, I utterly destroy Lothia (they had apparently lost over half their land, so they were pretty well fucked anyway) and then I get a stupid random event that gives me a choice of dudes to lead the levy. Seeing how the one option pisses off my wife for 10 prestige, aka fuck all, I go for the other option, as that could net me an extra martial point.
Except it doesn't, and I get the "content" trait instead....which I DIDN'T KNOW FUCKING CANCELS YOUR GODDAMN EXALTED AMBITION MOTHERFUCKING COCKBALLS. I WAS AT 700 FAME YOU STUPID COCKBITE GAME! FUCKING COCKCOCKCOCKCOCK GAME HAS MADE ME SO MAD IT CHANGED MY SEXUAL ORIENTATION GODDAMMIT.
CK2 really needs warnings for these fucking things.