Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  

Poll

How important is writing to you?

I'd like to become a professional writer in the next decade.
- 7 (29.2%)
Less than videogames.
- 6 (25%)
I am a professional writer.
- 3 (12.5%)
More than my health.
- 2 (8.3%)
I'm not sure.
- 5 (20.8%)
More than videogames.
- 0 (0%)
Not at all.
- 1 (4.2%)

Total Members Voted: 24

Voting closed: April 23, 2012, 11:42:36 pm


Pages: 1 ... 4 5 [6] 7 8 ... 38

Author Topic: Bay12 Writers Guild  (Read 58858 times)

Fishbreath

  • Bay Watcher
  • [AVATAR HERE]
    • View Profile
    • Many Words
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #75 on: August 30, 2010, 08:58:30 am »

Re: the thread title, I probably would have rendered it as Writers' Guild or Guild of Writers, but that's just me (although admittedly I have to deal with how to say whose Guild it is quite a bit in Many Words--where updates resume on Thursday!). If the Writers Guild of America does it without the apostrophe, I guess both are alright.

I don't really have much more to add, besides a sly remark that I'm mostly doing this to keep the thread looking healthy. I didn't read back very much; if people want another prompt I may be able to come up with one tomorrow morning (although I'm currently GMT+3, and my morning and yours are probably very different right now :P).

There's also a snippet of verse--just two lines--referring to the Many Words universe that may or may not eventually find its way into the story (maybe as part of a lullaby, since those seem to be pretty black a lot of the time):

Twelve forsake you, spirits take you
Lest you sleepless pass 'til morn

I tried 'bide' and 'wait' in where 'pass' is, but I liked the esses.

Supermikhail

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Dwarf Of Steel
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #76 on: August 30, 2010, 09:42:45 am »

@Fishbreath: Is it a charade? My guess is your pantheon comprises of twelve gods... And it's kind of bad as a lullaby currently. I understand it thusly: the gods will forsake you and spirits will take you if you don't stay awake until morning... More of a curse or an enchantment, really.

About writing prompts... Let's say we're on hiatus. I think a hero must arise who will start another round. I've changed the prompt two times already, and haven't had any luck with participants. Of course, if you come up with something absolutely brilliant, that will make people's writing organs salivate, post it, this thread could sure use it.

Oh, and thanks for bumping. :)

On the topic of writing. Today I'm in the mood for novels, the links about worldbuilding are going to come in useful. Additionally, I've come upon this article advertising organized approach to writing and describing the author's method step by step. Also, I'm currently trying to install and make run this piece of software, called yWriter. As my long-term plans now include the design of two fictional worlds, and are bound to irreparably clutter my home directory if I do it the old way, I hope to find yWriter very helpful in organizing the process.

And I wonder if the forum is going to be interested in my progress. ::)
Logged

Fishbreath

  • Bay Watcher
  • [AVATAR HERE]
    • View Profile
    • Many Words
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #77 on: August 30, 2010, 11:19:32 am »

@Fishbreath: Is it a charade? My guess is your pantheon comprises of twelve gods... And it's kind of bad as a lullaby currently. I understand it thusly: the gods will forsake you and spirits will take you if you don't stay awake until morning... More of a curse or an enchantment, really.

Pantheon is a passable way to describe it, if a bit misleading. >.> You've got the gist of it; scary lullabies are something of a cultural feature of Brazil, if the Internet doesn't misinform me, and the English "Rock-A-Bye Baby" is marginally creepy. I figured I'd just go overboard with it, since that's a feature of the Many Words world.

Supermikhail

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Dwarf Of Steel
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #78 on: August 30, 2010, 11:38:26 am »

My point wasn't creepiness. My point was that your lullaby tells the child to stay awake, while traditionally the genre is aimed in the opposite direction. ???
Logged

Willfor

  • Bay Watcher
  • The great magmaman adventurer. I do it for hugs.
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #79 on: August 30, 2010, 03:00:29 pm »

Creepy lullabies are perfectly fine... if you have the right sound to them. I mean literal sound. Without knowing what the sound is to it, the words have to be taken at face value. I can understand why they would have creepy lyrics though: The mother, desperately wanting sleep herself, begins a rather ugly thought process while her tone remains entirely comforting. Therapy for both parties. :P
Logged
In the wells of livestock vans with shells and garden sands /
Iron mixed with oxygen as per the laws of chemistry and chance /
A shape was roughly human, it was only roughly human /
Apparition eyes / Apparition eyes / Knock, apparition, knock / Eyes, apparition eyes /

Fishbreath

  • Bay Watcher
  • [AVATAR HERE]
    • View Profile
    • Many Words
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #80 on: September 01, 2010, 04:22:01 am »

Playing around a bit this morning led me to this:

Let the moonlight cease to wake you
Look to westward*, yet forlorn
Twelve forsake you, spirits take you
Lest you sleepless pass 'til morn

*Westward being toward the sunrise here.

Supermikhail

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Dwarf Of Steel
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #81 on: September 01, 2010, 05:17:04 am »

You can't say "Look to westward". Westward already means direction, it's not a place. Even if in your symbolism makes it such, grammatically it still remains incorrect.

On my previous comments, I've just discovered a couple of new meanings for the word lest, and while your last two lines seem to be technically semantically correct, they still do not read well to me. I read it like spirits aren't a supernatural evil force, but a side concerned about the child's lack of sleep, that is, they are going to do cruel things to him as a preventive measure against him staying awake all night.

Although, some readers might pass it on the account of fanciness. But I suggest you drop this part and start it anew, you seem to be too fixated on too small a matter, which doesn't look healthy to me. Poetry should be about as easy to write as prose, if it doesn't in your case, maybe you need to do some writing exercises.
Logged

Fishbreath

  • Bay Watcher
  • [AVATAR HERE]
    • View Profile
    • Many Words
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #82 on: September 01, 2010, 06:00:32 am »

I've seen "look to ____ward" before in lyrics and poetry. English grammar is flexible; she'll whore herself out to any two-bit hack like myself at the drop of a hat.

As for speed, I'd disagree with that. Writing decent verse is way harder than writing good prose--you write prose to evoke a feeling, but you have a purpose for every single word in a piece of verse, and that's hard to do with prose of any length.

As for meaning, I'll simply say that it reads okay to me. Spirits aren't necessarily benevolent. If you want I'll explain more, but it'll have to wait. It's a huge pain typing on a phone keyboard.

Supermikhail

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Dwarf Of Steel
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #83 on: September 01, 2010, 07:26:22 am »

Ah, then, all is good. And the best thing is, my ignorant temptations haven't shaken your confidence (as it would happen to me in your place, I imagine).

In other news, in the process of design overhaul I've doodle up a picture for the "On criticism section". Here it is:

Logged

Fishbreath

  • Bay Watcher
  • [AVATAR HERE]
    • View Profile
    • Many Words
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #84 on: September 01, 2010, 10:05:03 am »

Hah. I love it.

As for self-confidence (which is a nicer way of saying "massive ego") I'm certainly not lacking in that. From my Rules of Letting People See Your Writing:
#1. Everyone's a critic.
#1a. They're not always right.
#1b. They're not always wrong, either.

Duelmaster409

  • Bay Watcher
  • [DOES_NOT_FIGHT]
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #85 on: September 01, 2010, 11:28:26 pm »

I've written a couple of drafts and ideas of what would be a Sci-Fi outer space novel, but I don't have them readily available to post. Perhaps I'll continue on the idea and post some results here.
Logged
Dwarf fortress: Teaching uni level geology to sadistic elf killers for years.

Acanthus117

  • Bay Watcher
  • Angry Writer
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #86 on: September 01, 2010, 11:57:31 pm »

posting to keep track!
Logged
Is apparently a Lizardman. ಠ_ಠ
YOU DOUBLE PENIS
"The pessimist is either always right or pleasantly surprised; he cherishes that which is good because he knows it cannot last."

Supermikhail

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Dwarf Of Steel
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #87 on: September 02, 2010, 10:08:30 am »

So I thought - why don't I bump this thread with the progress of my forum-raid. Of course, I'm already in the middle of Creative projects. But better late than never.

Today's highlight -

On the topic of bad prose. It appears that it's really much easier to write good short stories than good long genre. Part of the problem must lie in wrapping your head around the plot, and rewrites are much easier. Also, practicing in the genre with novels must be a killer. So, I take my hat off to Fishbreath and Willfor, for their determination.
Logged

Fishbreath

  • Bay Watcher
  • [AVATAR HERE]
    • View Profile
    • Many Words
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #88 on: September 02, 2010, 12:05:03 pm »

Welcome to the club, Duelmaster. Hang your coat over there, pour yourself a cup of [INSERT BEVERAGE OF CHOICE], and have a seat. :P

@Supermikhail: I just looked at yWriter, and that looks pretty darn useful to me. I haven't had a chance to try it out, but all the organization features look like exactly the sort of stuff I could use for Many Words*--I have an outline on my head, and a little bit on paper, but I have a way of forgetting things and losing papers.

The forum is also totally interested in your progress. We don't talk enough about worldbuilding here, or writing-in-progress and those are very, very important components to the end product. The deeper the world, the more believable the stories set in it are, and it's much easier to edit something or give mechanical pointers if it's not done yet.

* Which has begun updating again!

Supermikhail

  • Bay Watcher
  • The Dwarf Of Steel
    • View Profile
Re: Bay12 Writers Guild
« Reply #89 on: September 02, 2010, 02:23:22 pm »

Well, Fishbreath, you've prompted me to finally read through all of the current Many Words, and I've come up with a new bunch of harsh critique.

But first, a positive moment! The new chapter, and finally action! Also, I totally relished the description of the draug. I'd wanted to find out what it was for so long. On that suspense I can commend you. Now...

To start mild - watch out your dialogue tags. In Unhappy Circumstances you use "he allowed". I simply froze in disbelief when I read up to that place. Big no. The fewer times you use anything but "said", the better, and I've been slowly developing an opinion that one should strive to do without dialogue tags at all. Kind of perfection of dialogue. Call me crazy.

A larger problem. Maybe I just read it too fast, but the characters don't seem to me to tick as unique. Like, the dialogue is spoken by one person. I can't pin it down, I can only guess that it's possible that you don't quite get into the heads of your characters. Or maybe you need to work on your dialogue. I feel you characters could use... more different characters.

It occurred to me when I read about Eirik trying to explain to the mariners his spirit sight. Basically, this sight, this magic, is something that a lot of his friends have, that a bunch of people in this world can do. It seems like every corner has a wizard guild, and every person has a spell book. So, why are we interested in these people, Anja, Rakel and Eirik? Well, Anja seems sort of mildly unusual, although Eirik goes around resurrecting girls like her all the time, and the council has seen magic more powerful than hers. Eirik - is your average mage, it appears as if he's in this story just to provide background, explain the mechanics of this world to the reader. Rakel - is simply a capricious witch. I read to the end of Three Arrivals and couldn't understand why they were chosen as protagonists, and not any other commoner. So, my guess is, you cut the chapter a little too early, because the first chapter should show the reader why he should care. Or you need to tweak the pacing.

Then, in some places names seem to be intriguingly long. Would you consider translating what they mean in a footnote? I feel like I'm missing out on some word play (or you're trying to hypnotize me with magical letter combinations 8)).

Another little note. Somewhere on the ship, we've met two characters whose names start with "E" (three names, if I recall correctly, Eirik E-something and Captain Eriksson or something). It's a bad practice, because it confuses the reader.
Logged
Pages: 1 ... 4 5 [6] 7 8 ... 38