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Author Topic: Why are elves tree lovers?  (Read 10982 times)

Encased in burning magma

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #30 on: August 11, 2010, 02:23:50 am »



OMG TREE FVCKING HUGGERS! AND KISSERS! AND..... oh dear.....


Tree-shagging pixies!
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[MILL_CHILD:ONLY_IF_GOOD_REASON]

Thundrim

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #31 on: August 11, 2010, 04:01:14 am »



OMG TREE FVCKING HUGGERS! AND KISSERS! AND..... oh dear.....


Tree-shagging pixies!

A most accurate description, even with so few words involved. The toothpick-launching, glade-dancing, flower-picking, nudist-frolicking, wine-sipping, tree-hugging faeries, substance-sniffing, long-eared lute-playing nuisances, might have quite a few associations going for them.

But that one was simply put, beautiful!     

---
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MaDeR Levap

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #32 on: August 11, 2010, 07:07:10 pm »

I imagined that "elf" is replaced by other word, beginning on "j"...

...DF and its community will make me insane some day. If it did not this already.
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Jordrake

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #33 on: August 14, 2010, 06:30:08 pm »

Because they are not only protectors and guardians of the forest; they are also part of the natural ecological system.

Trees die naturally. Trees fall. Twigs and other items gather up in huge amounts. The elves do not spoil anything, they see to it that fallen beasts are consumed and fallen trees are put to good use. Yet they don't disrupt the balance of other scavangers in the ecosystem because they are so gentle and noble in their work of the forest. The life of an elf is spent tipping on this thin, proper line of balance of harmony.
That sounds very fair towards elves, and a reasonable explanation. He's an elvish sympathiser, get 'im!
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DerUbermensch

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #34 on: August 15, 2010, 11:08:49 am »

Because the Elves are morally myopic, hypocritical, self-righteous, cannibalistic, slaver, hippy bastards.

Long ago, my grandpa told the elves this right before he killed them, "Get a haircut, HIPPIE!"
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Rose

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #35 on: August 15, 2010, 11:26:34 am »

you guys are getting it all wrong.

elves have a complete wood surplus, and are trying to get rid of as much of it as possible.

the mere suggestion that they should take in more wood from you is a grievous insult. do it enough times and they throw their excess wood at you in an attempt to get the message across.
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Josephus

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #36 on: August 15, 2010, 04:25:31 pm »

Yes. They even have special wood-launchers just to make things more efficient; unfortunately, launched wood tends to break quite easily.
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i had the elves bring me two tigermen, although i forgot to let them out of the cage and they died : ( i was sad : (

Andreus

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #37 on: August 16, 2010, 08:59:05 am »

Because of [ETHIC:KILL_PLANT:UNTHINKABLE]
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Robsoie

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Re: Why are elves tree lovers?
« Reply #38 on: August 16, 2010, 10:23:25 am »

Elven people summon the wood they need so they do not hurt any tree.
Strangely every time an elf summon several wood logs, a dwarf wood stockpile mysteriously disappears.

This mystery has not been solved yet, but helped in the investigation by elven ambassadors, the dwarven people begin to suspect magma.
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