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[the1337doofus]

Dear marksdwarves of the Mountainhome Rocksnourished,
FOR THE LOVE OF ARMOK, GO USE THE DAMN ARCHERY RANGE!! DON'T JUST STAND IN THE DINING HALL PERFORMING THE NOT-JOB "Go To Archery Practice"!! I KNOW you are active duty, and I KNOW you are assigned to the range. AND I KNOW you have plenty of assigned ammo! There are only about 1000 bolts waiting in the stockpile!

Also, to my late Captain of the Guard: I DO NOT CARE IF YOU'RE A HIGH MASTER DODGER! AS MY ONLY ELITE MARKSDWARF, I EXPECT YOU TO KNOW NOT TO JUMP !!OVER!! THE FORTIFICATIONS AND FALL 3 Z-LEVELS INTO THE BAND OF 15-ODD GOBLIN ARCHERS!!!!

Sincerely, your Vindictive but Temporarily Merciful Overlord
PS. Congrats, Urist McDumbass, your Decent Tomb has been reassigned. Enjoy the communal cemetery, booze brain.

For some strange reason, Marksdwarves get stuck if put on active duty without orders. Take them off active duty but keep them uniformed, and they'll spend most of their time training.

[WanderingKid]

Dear marksdwarves of the Mountainhome Rocksnourished,
FOR THE LOVE OF ARMOK, GO USE THE DAMN ARCHERY RANGE!! DON'T JUST STAND IN THE DINING HALL PERFORMING THE NOT-JOB "Go To Archery Practice"!! I KNOW you are active duty, and I KNOW you are assigned to the range. AND I KNOW you have plenty of assigned ammo! There are only about 1000 bolts waiting in the stockpile!

Also, to my late Captain of the Guard: I DO NOT CARE IF YOU'RE A HIGH MASTER DODGER! AS MY ONLY ELITE MARKSDWARF, I EXPECT YOU TO KNOW NOT TO JUMP !!OVER!! THE FORTIFICATIONS AND FALL 3 Z-LEVELS INTO THE BAND OF 15-ODD GOBLIN ARCHERS!!!!

Sincerely, your Vindictive but Temporarily Merciful Overlord
PS. Congrats, Urist McDumbass, your Decent Tomb has been reassigned. Enjoy the communal cemetery, booze brain.

For some strange reason, Marksdwarves get stuck if put on active duty without orders. Take them off active duty but keep them uniformed, and they'll spend most of their time training.

Weird, I've never had this problem.  Then again I usually issue a full squad of 10 orders for 2 to train so they build up shield/wrestling.

[Doktoro Reichard]

Marksdwarves use only archery ranges if they aren't assigned any scheduled orders. It's their way to spend time. If they have training orders, then they will try to do every other sort of military training performed at a barracks, which may not be possible if they haven't a training barracks assigned. This being said, they do practice archery even if on training schedule, only (as it seemed at the time) at a slower rate.

[than402]

Dear Dwarves of Flagbore,

I commanded you to put the prisoners of the last sieges in two cages.Not only have you not finished the job,but you started to empty the cages,and put them back in single cages.And now,you return them back to the previous cages.So,before i go stark raving mad myself,i want to ask you one thing:

WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THIS?

[smjjames]

Dear Dwarves of Flagbore,

I commanded you to put the prisoners of the last sieges in two cages.Not only have you not finished the job,but you started to empty the cages,and put them back in single cages.And now,you return them back to the previous cages.So,before i go stark raving mad myself,i want to ask you one thing:

WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THIS?

Did you switch those already caged or to be caged from one cage to another? I did that to try and speed things up and they did basically what you did, had to wait until they finished. I don't know if you have DFhack, but one of the plugins on there which helps with management of caged/pastured animals, try activating show/hide caged.

The ui doesn't show who is in what cage, so it gets confusing when you try and change what is in which cage while the dwarves are still in progress or haven't gotten there yet and you are putting things in multiple cages at once.

[than402]

Dear Dwarves of Flagbore,

I commanded you to put the prisoners of the last sieges in two cages.Not only have you not finished the job,but you started to empty the cages,and put them back in single cages.And now,you return them back to the previous cages.So,before i go stark raving mad myself,i want to ask you one thing:

WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THIS?

Did you switch those already caged or to be caged from one cage to another? I did that to try and speed things up and they did basically what you did, had to wait until they finished. I don't know if you have DFhack, but one of the plugins on there which helps with management of caged/pastured animals, try activating show/hide caged.

The ui doesn't show who is in what cage, so it gets confusing when you try and change what is in which cage while the dwarves are still in progress or haven't gotten there yet and you are putting things in multiple cages at once.

i'm not entirely sure,but i probably did.i do have DFhack,so i should download this plugin immediately.thanks.

[smjjames]

Dear Dwarves of Flagbore,

I commanded you to put the prisoners of the last sieges in two cages.Not only have you not finished the job,but you started to empty the cages,and put them back in single cages.And now,you return them back to the previous cages.So,before i go stark raving mad myself,i want to ask you one thing:

WHY THE HELL ARE YOU DOING THIS?

Did you switch those already caged or to be caged from one cage to another? I did that to try and speed things up and they did basically what you did, had to wait until they finished. I don't know if you have DFhack, but one of the plugins on there which helps with management of caged/pastured animals, try activating show/hide caged.

The ui doesn't show who is in what cage, so it gets confusing when you try and change what is in which cage while the dwarves are still in progress or haven't gotten there yet and you are putting things in multiple cages at once.

i'm not entirely sure,but i probably did.i do have DFhack,so i should download this plugin immediately.thanks.

If you were moving lots of goblins, it could have happened without realizing it. Also, it's included in DFhack, or should be.

[Doktoro Reichard]

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It isn't included in DFHack, but is in the LNP if I recall. This is, assuming you are referring to the UI Improvement Plugins by Falconne.

[smjjames]

It isn't included in DFHack, but is in the LNP if I recall. This is, assuming you are referring to the UI Improvement Plugins by Falconne.

Oh I see. I thought it was included in DFhack and yes it's the plugins by Falconne.

[Eidako]

Dear Urist McVampire,



Nice try, but the world is only 101 years old; you can't possibly be 125. You almost fooled me, I almost made you my broker, but you won't be drinking any blood in my fort. But you know, it would be a shame to let those social skills go to waste. I think I will add you to my administration team.

I hope you enjoy your very own 1x1 office with no doors, where you will keep the books updated to the highest degree of precision.

For all eternity.

[Akura]

Dear Urist McVampire,



Nice try, but the world is only 101 years old; you can't possibly be 125. You almost fooled me, I almost made you my broker, but you won't be drinking any blood in my fort. But you know, it would be a shame to let those social skills go to waste. I think I will add you to my administration team.

I hope you enjoy your very own 1x1 office with no doors, where you will keep the books updated to the highest degree of precision.

For all eternity.

Actually, no. Dwarves can be older than the world. Like shown, their age will be displayed as "has the appearance of somebody that is xx years old." Typically, this is the case with your starting seven if you have a short worldgen.

Then again, your S7 are rarely pushing the end of a dwarf's (un*)natural lifespan.

*Because it's just not normal for a dwarf to die of old age.

[vicwarrior]

Dear Urist McBaroness.

I understand your claims of a lesser dwarf having better holdings than yours have been ignored, but throwing a tantrum and almost murdering the legendary weaponsmith that has forged the weapons to keep the fortress safe has been noted and subsequently and the following upgrades have been made to your dining room:

-Magma safe furniture including doors and everything.
-Liquid drainage sytem to avoid any spilled over alchool to stay on the ground making the floor slippery.
-"ventilation" system.

In addition to all that a lever has been created on your dining room and you and you alone are allowed to pull it in order to have your reward dispensed for all your hard barony work.

Also mind that for administrative mistakes your tomb has been unasigned temporarily, should you die within the following days you will be buried in communal graves instead of your well deserved mausoleom.

[magnum2016]

(Corrosion Zombie Mod) 

Dear pathetic militia

When we get raided by zombies i would very much appreciate it if when I order you to attack the  horde spilling through our gates you actually attack them instead of refilling your water bags and getting a bite to eat.

-Your very angry god

[callisto8413]

Also, to my late Captain of the Guard: I DO NOT CARE IF YOU'RE A HIGH MASTER DODGER! AS MY ONLY ELITE MARKSDWARF, I EXPECT YOU TO KNOW NOT TO JUMP !!OVER!! THE FORTIFICATIONS AND FALL 3 Z-LEVELS INTO THE BAND OF 15-ODD GOBLIN ARCHERS!!!!

Sincerely, your Vindictive but Temporarily Merciful Overlord
PS. Congrats, Urist McDumbass, your Decent Tomb has been reassigned. Enjoy the communal cemetery, booze brain.

Maybe he thought he was a certain member of the Order of the Stick?
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0435.html

[Doktoro Reichard]

Also, to my late Captain of the Guard: I DO NOT CARE IF YOU'RE A HIGH MASTER DODGER! AS MY ONLY ELITE MARKSDWARF, I EXPECT YOU TO KNOW NOT TO JUMP !!OVER!! THE FORTIFICATIONS AND FALL 3 Z-LEVELS INTO THE BAND OF 15-ODD GOBLIN ARCHERS!!!!

Sincerely, your Vindictive but Temporarily Merciful Overlord
PS. Congrats, Urist McDumbass, your Decent Tomb has been reassigned. Enjoy the communal cemetery, booze brain.

Maybe he thought he was a certain member of the Order of the Stick?
http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0435.html

To be fair, Belkar only jumped to avoid the Mark of Justice acting up on him while inside Azure City (because if he killed anyone inside the city limits, he would most likely die from the curse).

I wonder... if a bolt fired inside a city killed a goblin outside it, would it still count as an in-city kill?