Greetings and falicitations, dwarven procreation unit designation GroupQ_Gen0_Unit1!
It has come to my attention that you have somehow lost your right foot. Considering that the only means available by which this could concievably have occured is through a training mishap, and the fact that the foot is nowhere to be found, leads me to suspect that either you are grossly incompetent at the axelord training drills that have been instituted, or you have been finding ways to go play with the giant peregrine falcon people outside, despite the fortress being completely sealed.
By all means, I am VERY pleased that you have not only gotten accustomed to tradgedy, but also don't really care about anything anymore, I would like to point out that fortress security is EVERYONE'S responsibility. If you have been sneaking out of the fortress somehow, it is your civic duty to make an announcement of this fact, so that your loving overseer can properly seal the breach you were using to do so. You don't want an invading horde of crundles in your bedroom do you? Of course you don't.
While the loss of your foot does pose certain liabilities, your primary responsibility at this point is as a member of the proletariot, a duty to which even quadrupal amputeeism will be uninhibited by. I would however, greatly appreciate it if you would be more careful in your drills. No, you will not be removed from the training roster.
I understand that some unruly members of the fortress have expressed concern over the immediate deployment of actual axes for axe training demonstrations, and not the deployment of completely useless wooden training axes. While the risks of training accidents are substantially higher, this practice also ensure that should a *real* threat to the fortress arrive, such as a forgotten beast, or a wandering giant, that you and your fellow dwarven procreation units will not errantly attempt to fell such beasts using a polished 2x4, instead of an actual axe, as I am sure you will have considerable difficulty telling them apart in the great haste of the emergency.
Remember, the best and brightest of your progeny will inherit the fortress, and the primary purpose for your current military training is to provide the best possible education to the surviving offspring you will produce, for the betterment and glory of the dwarven master race. This means your primary responsibilites are to not die or otherwise disable yourselves while training, and to produce as many vibrant and healthy children as possible.
Getting limbs removed does not satisfy either of those goals. Please avoid having this happen in the future.
Yours in armok's will, your loving and devoted overseer.
Author
Topic: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves (Read 1555541 times)