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[ThatAussieGuy]

Dear Embark Site Selection Committee-

I petitioned the committee for a site with, I thought, I very reasonable list of requirements. No aquifer. Some soil, to farm on. Metals at various heights because WE ARE DWARVES. And flux stone, because steel is necessary. You gave me a list of several suitable sites, though I wonder why you seemed so insistent on my embarking in either sinister areas or areas infested with Armokdamned unicorns.

After exhaustively sifting through each prospective site, I have to ask, would it really have been that hard to tell me that there was no flux stone, apparently anywhere in the world?

Dear Overseer;
You survived the journey?!  Uh... Well, there IS flux stone, but you'll have to dig deep for it.  VERY deep.  Just under those metal veins in the magma sea, in fact.  There's lots of flux stone under there, according to our surveys...

Sincerely;
The Very Suspicious Embark Site Selection Committee

[Corai]

Dear Zombie crocodiles,


Why are you so weak? Your pathetic. Im tempted to make a ZOO for you guys, your only dangerous when its raining blister-inducing vomit. Please be dangerous, please.

Love, your insane overseer

[WillowLuman]

Dear Zombie crocodiles,


Why are you so weak? Your pathetic. Im tempted to make a ZOO for you guys, your only dangerous when its raining blister-inducing vomit. Please be dangerous, please.

Love, your insane overseer

Deer Overzeer

Zombiez is currently zuffering frum critical brane famine. Brain deficienzy makes zombies week, zluggish and lezz able to cope wif injurees. I zujjest openeeng dor to fort, laying down weponz, and letting zombies come in zo they can receive propur kare and treetment. The zombies ar just afreed cuz they think da pointee weapons will hurt them an just wan to playfite.

Zincerely, am expurt dorf advizer (not the zombies)

[Eric Blank]

Dear Urist McPriest-doctor.

Please stop spamming your recuperation-buff spell at all hours. You have only been using it on yourself, nonstop, for weeks. At least try to shake things up a but by using some of the other spells you know.

Sincerely, your Overseer Who Doesn't Like to Check His Combat Reports Like a Paranoid Elf for Fear that Something is Actually Happening In-Between Your Spell Castings.

[Ria Hawk]

Dear Embark Site Selection Committee-

I petitioned the committee for a site with, I thought, I very reasonable list of requirements. No aquifer. Some soil, to farm on. Metals at various heights because WE ARE DWARVES. And flux stone, because steel is necessary. You gave me a list of several suitable sites, though I wonder why you seemed so insistent on my embarking in either sinister areas or areas infested with Armokdamned unicorns.

After exhaustively sifting through each prospective site, I have to ask, would it really have been that hard to tell me that there was no flux stone, apparently anywhere in the world?

Dear Overseer;
You survived the journey?!  Uh... Well, there IS flux stone, but you'll have to dig deep for it.  VERY deep.  Just under those metal veins in the magma sea, in fact.  There's lots of flux stone under there, according to our surveys...

Sincerely;
The Very Suspicious Embark Site Selection Committee

So... you want me to get this supposed flux from a place I need at least steel and probably candy to get to. Does this have anything to do with no less than THREE nobles having a preference for slade?

[Greiger]

To the executioner.

Thank you for testing the execution skill tag on your noble position.  It was very impressive watching you chop that vampire into chunks with that iron greatsword.  Despite how you had to write it down in all the paperwork as a hammering.

Next time however please avoid sending vampire limbs into the prison water source.  Not all the convicts are vampires, and I would like to avoid making more.

The administration.

[Corai]

To the executioner.

Thank you for testing the execution skill tag on your noble position.  It was very impressive watching you chop that vampire into chunks with that iron greatsword.  Despite how you had to write it down in all the paperwork as a hammering.

Next time however please avoid sending vampire limbs into the prison water source.  Not all the convicts are vampires, and I would like to avoid making more.

The administration.

MY PEOPLE COME FROM LINE OF GREAT HAMMERER/VAMPIRES, I TAKE PRIDE IN MY ACTIONS. I WILL SPREAD MY PEOPLE'S BLOOD. I AM A HAMMERER AT HEART.


PLUS I DONT KNOW HOW TO SPELL SWORDEROR CORRECTLY.


-sworderor/ sworder/sworderrer/hammerer

[ThatAussieGuy]

To the executioner.

Thank you for testing the execution skill tag on your noble position.  It was very impressive watching you chop that vampire into chunks with that iron greatsword.  Despite how you had to write it down in all the paperwork as a hammering.

Next time however please avoid sending vampire limbs into the prison water source.  Not all the convicts are vampires, and I would like to avoid making more.

The administration.

I only have one speed;  Chop till they stop (twitching).

Sincerely;  Urist McExecutioner.

[Eric Blank]

Dear executioner,

That's not a measure of speed at all: it's a plan of action!

Sincerely, random passersby

[WillowLuman]

DEAR EXECUTIONER

CONTINUE EXTERMINATIONS!

SIGNED - THE DALEK EMPIRE OF "THE CORRUPT FISH"

[tahujdt]

Dear Hiver McMiner, I do not care that there is a large rat in the mines.I say Screw That. Really, screw  it. You are holding a drill. It has nothing. Screw it.

[miauw62]

Dear Hiver McMiner, I do not care that there is a large rat in the mines.I say Screw That. Really, screw  it. You are holding a drill. It has nothing. Screw it.

Dear overseer,

BUT DID YOU SEE THOSE FANGS?
It'll chop me in half with just ONE bite!
I wont fight that huge monster!

Sinercely, Urist McMiner

[tahujdt]

Urist McMiner, I was not addressing you. I was addressing Hiver McMiner. Sincerely, the only guy who knows how to open a box of synthcake. (Underhive mod)

[Reudh]

Dear Dwarves of Astikal "Sabreheal",

Please stay away from that Infernal Ash.
Also, get started on breaching the caverns. You guy's'll need water soon, as you're on a glacier with no plants or trees.

Sincerely,

Reudh.

[Lielac]

Dear Tholtig, mechanic of Luremachines:

DO YOUR JOB RIGHT. You are the head mechanic (by virtue of being the ONLY mechanic), and as such are my front line against the elven menace. If you cannot hook up a bridge, floor hatch, and door so that they are open and closed at the same time, YOU FAIL. Please fix this issue, before I dig down to the magma just to throw you into it.

P.S.: NO BREAKS UNTIL THE DROWNING TRAP IS DONE.