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[94dima94]

Dear Urist mcEveryone,

how, in the name of Armok, did you think THAT was a good place to stop the wagon?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Well, I tried. But you could barely reach your picks before the ice melted, so it's not my fault at all. Have fun in the water, you idiots!

EDIT: Nope, nobody survived. Well, this was interesting...

[Magnumcannon]

Dear Urist mcEveryone,

how, in the name of Armok, did you think THAT was a good place to stop the wagon?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Well, I tried. But you could barely reach your picks before the ice melted, so it's not my fault at all. Have fun in the water, you idiots!

EDIT: Nope, nobody survived. Well, this was interesting...

Urist 1 has been scuttled!
Urist 2 has been scuttled!
Urist 3 has been scuttled!
Urist 4 has been scuttled!
Urist 5 has been scuttled!
Urist 6 has been scuttled!
Urist 7 has been scuttled!
Your settlement has crumbled to its end.

[Nyxalinth]

Dear Krazzt McDremora,

When you claimed a glass furnace, I didn't hold high hopes for the fort's first artifact.  You're a craftsdremora, after all.  I checked your likes and dislikes, and saw you like helms and thrones.  I still didn't have much hope, but I was curious to see what you'd do.  You grabbed one piece of glass...

...and turned out a boring but very useful glass throne.  While I'm unsure how you managed to construct an entire throne out of one chunk of glass with enough to spare for hanging rings (Hermeus Mora may know; I do not) I'm very pleased.  I hope that your Kyn remember your example when future moods strike.  Too bad you stayed a craftsdremora: legendary glass guy would have been awesome.

Your pleased overseer

[Thisfox]

Dear Urist mcEveryone,

how, in the name of Armok, did you think THAT was a good place to stop the wagon?

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Dear Overseer.

Urist McDrunkdriver was at the helm again, and the next thing we knew, there was wind whistling past our ears, and we landed on the ice. Surrounded by cliffs, and a scattering of animals which had escaped their broken tethers and cages. We were just managing to stumble out of the wagon (Which, I might note, was NOT installed with airbags, nor seatbelts) when there was a series of loud cracks in the ice, and it was entirely not our fault what happened next.

Next time, don't make the man in charge a sodding brewer.

Thanks.

Your seven dwarves.

[enisea]

Dear Zuglar,
I have chosen you to carve the one fortification needed for our glass industry. Was it absolutely necessary to lick the magma?
Now we have come to this...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[Bumber]

Dear Zuglar,
I have chosen you to carve the one fortification needed for our glass industry. Was it absolutely necessary to lick the magma?
Now we have come to this...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

http://youtu.be/LPU7V64_K3s?t=20m46s

[Thisfox]

Dear Zuglar,
I have chosen you to carve the one fortification needed for our glass industry. Was it absolutely necessary to lick the magma?
Now we have come to this...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I love how there are even tears on Zuglars face. That's... it's just such an excellent game, this game.

[Dwarf4Explosives]

That made me snigger loudly, and now I am crying (from laughter, luckily, not lava).

[enisea]

Well, Zuglar is not done yet...

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Dear Zuglar, I mean Sakzulkat, please do stop it.

[Dwarf4Explosives]

So, if I interpreted the ASCII correctly (I use Phoebus), the magmadrinkerdorf got reanimated by a necromancer and is killing other dwarves by lighting them on fire?

[Larix]

It's more likely to be an evil biome. If the wrestler corpse also manages to rise (before it gets degraded out of existence by the fire), there'd be genuine ‼fun‼ in the fort.

[Cryxis, Prince of Doom]

Dear Urist McThreasher,
Why did you not take the long way back for your hauling job and avoid the giant cave bat. Why didn't you just stay out of its way, why couldn't you run faster? Not that you are all that important of a dwarf just that you now can not walk or grab things. You got your knee set and sewn but your hands are destroyed.
Now I have to watch you crawl  down 40 flights of stairs to go get food then crawl all the way back up.

[enisea]

It's more likely to be an evil biome. If the wrestler corpse also manages to rise (before it gets degraded out of existence by the fire), there'd be genuine ‼fun‼ in the fort.

It is. I hope he doesn't. Returning to the topic:

Dear Dumat,
you have managed to succeed where many others failed. Well done!
Also, congratulations for the most !!dwarven!! way to kill a zombie.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Your well-deserved price is this nice ☼gabbro coffin☼
Please do rest in peace.

[Dwarf4Explosives]

He boiled it to death with his own blood ?

[Thisfox]

It's more likely to be an evil biome. If the wrestler corpse also manages to rise (before it gets degraded out of existence by the fire), there'd be genuine ‼fun‼ in the fort.

It is. I hope he doesn't. Returning to the topic:

Dear Dumat,
you have managed to succeed where many others failed. Well done!
Also, congratulations for the most !!dwarven!! way to kill a zombie.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Your well-deserved price is this nice ☼gabbro coffin☼
Please do rest in peace.

He boiled it to death with his own blood ?

Yup. He did. Very very !!dwarfy!! indeed.

- - - - - - - - - - - - -

Dear Fortress:

I just heard that another fortress has dwarves who are capable of destroying each other using their own weaponised blood. You lot couldn't kill an angry capybara in the dining room with decorated weapons and plate armour! I'm very disappointed. The children it managed to maim and kill are very disappointed as well. And now we have a depressed doctor. The Gods only know how that's going to turn out. Good luck recovering from your capybara-induced injuries without a trained doctor.

--The Overseer.