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[Thisfox]

That would make the bag situation worse, not better. I think they do get scavengers, if they're stored incorrectly and with no cats. But the bags don't appear to be turn-off-able.

[Frogging101]

Dear Marksdwarves of Knifeconvents,

Pick up some god damn ammo. Like, right now. If I wanted hammerdwarves, I would conscript hammerdwarves. With actual hammers and metal armour instead of crossbows and leather. There are bins full of nice, new, high quality iron bolts right next to your barracks. So fill those empty quivers already because if we get raided, I'm going to send you out to snipe the attackers. And if you don't have anything to shoot them with then you will die, and your friends and families will be in danger because of your incompetence.

Sincerely,
Your Overseer

[Greiger]

To Kor, Militia Commander,

You were my favorite fortress member this embark.  Your purpose as one of the starting 7 was your proficient teaching skill, and not only did you teach an entire squad to be masters of the sword, you were the most reliable warrior in the fortress, with 4 kills under your belt when most others didn't have 1.  You weren't even of the custom race's primary warrior caste, yet you outperformed the larger and stronger red and black dracon you were teaching in every way.

Your heroic charge against the gem forgotten beast will never be forgotten, you took the blast of deadly vapor before the rest of your students arrived, and then proceeded to hand the thing's ass to it solo while bleeding out of every bodypart you had.  Finally cleaving the thing in two right before the students got in range of the vapors. Then like some heroic movie dropped to the ground dead only 2 ticks after the beast.

You dreamed of becoming a legendary warrior, you were one level from your dream when you engaged the forgotten beast.  I am proud to announce that you gained a level during that battle.  Congratulations on being the fortress's first legendary warrior.

The Administration


To the crossbowdracon of Violencegirder,

Seriously when the forgotten beast showed up I told you where to stand in the fortifications.  You stood everywhere BUT there.  If you would have been standing next to the fortifications like I asked Kor may still be alive, or at the very least you would have seen her heroic sacrifice instead of admiring walls and tower caps.

The Administration.

[Pirate Bob]

Dear rest of the hauler corps,

Stop gathering all those plum and cherry pits and apple seeds. They cannot be planted anyway; they are just a waste of bags. The titan silk farm is not for making infinite bags.

Yours, the overseer of Sprycanyon.

I'm at the point where I'm selling my bags of pits and treeseeds to the merchants, and buying empty bags in their place. It's very annoying. I wonder if I can forbid the pits and move the bags? Would that work? {wanders off to find out}

Maybe just try to use apples, cherries, and other fruits producing useless seeds for cooking, and forbid brewing so they don't produce any seeds?  Unless your nobles have a strong need for the associated booze, I'm guessing you have more than enough variety of booze in your fort without brewing apples and cherries.  Any unless dwarves for some reason really like raw apples/cherries, they don't tend to eat raw food if prepared meals are available.

Actually, as I was writing this an even simpler idea occurred to me - can't you just enable cooking of all the useless seeds?  I haven't actually played a fort in the new version yet, but by default cooking of all seeds is disabled, but can be enabled in the kitchen menu.  Then you can turn all those useless apple seeds into tasty apple seed roasts.

Edit - based on the raws, it looks like apple seeds and cherry pits aren't edible, so that won't work.  Oh well.  I think you could make the annoying seeds go away by just removing [GROWTH_HAS_SEED] under [GROWTH:FRUIT] for the offending plants.  I haven't tried this, so I don't know if it would actually work or cause any other problems.  Or just don't brew them, as described above.  Or you could add [EDIBLE_RAW] and/or [EDIBLE_COOKED] to the seeds.  Or it would be probably be pretty easy to add a reaction to process them into oil, like with rock nuts.

[Thisfox]

I already have them on cook-don't-brew. As far as I know, someone must be getting the occasional fresh, crisp, juicy pear or apple out of stores and eating it, then keeping the seeds for me. So helpful! What I wish, more, is that they would put all the seeds in the same bag, instead of putting a few seeds in each bag. That would help. But the "trade for new empty bags" method seems to be working. And so far no one has mandated that I'm not allowed to sell bags or seeds. Thank god. They mandate everything else....



In other news:

Dear Urist McIwantthisthing,
Please stop mandating things you don't actually have a use for. You just mandated three cups, but I know for a fact that you drink straight out of a barrel, we all saw you do it. You mandated figurines last week, and yet you have no interest in putting them anywhere or using them for anything. And don't say that the third figurine didn't count: It was a goddamn Artifact! An artifact figurine! You should have at least congratulated the dwarf child who went above and beyond the call of duty in making you an artifact figurine instead of a normal one, instead of kicking one of the adorable little fort kittens! You're a temperamental bastard.
--The management.

[Insert_Gnome_Here]

Dear rest of the hauler corps,

Stop gathering all those plum and cherry pits and apple seeds. They cannot be planted anyway; they are just a waste of bags. The titan silk farm is not for making infinite bags.

Yours, the overseer of Sprycanyon.

I'm at the point where I'm selling my bags of pits and treeseeds to the merchants, and buying empty bags in their place. It's very annoying. I wonder if I can forbid the pits and move the bags? Would that work? {wanders off to find out}

Maybe just try to use apples, cherries, and other fruits producing useless seeds for cooking, and forbid brewing so they don't produce any seeds?  Unless your nobles have a strong need for the associated booze, I'm guessing you have more than enough variety of booze in your fort without brewing apples and cherries.  Any unless dwarves for some reason really like raw apples/cherries, they don't tend to eat raw food if prepared meals are available.

Actually, as I was writing this an even simpler idea occurred to me - can't you just enable cooking of all the useless seeds?  I haven't actually played a fort in the new version yet, but by default cooking of all seeds is disabled, but can be enabled in the kitchen menu.  Then you can turn all those useless apple seeds into tasty apple seed roasts.

Edit - based on the raws, it looks like apple seeds and cherry pits aren't edible, so that won't work.  Oh well.  I think you could make the annoying seeds go away by just removing [GROWTH_HAS_SEED] under [GROWTH:FRUIT] for the offending plants.  I haven't tried this, so I don't know if it would actually work or cause any other problems.  Or just don't brew them, as described above.  Or you could add [EDIBLE_RAW] and/or [EDIBLE_COOKED] to the seeds.  Or it would be probably be pretty easy to add a reaction to process them into oil, like with rock nuts.

Use for coindtar or dwarven shotgun?

[Bigheaded]

Will they still put them in a bag with barrels and bins completely disabled?
Not something i've tested.

[Meneth]

They will. Each winter, I go through the seed stockpile and magma-dump all the useless seeds.

[Snaake]

They will. Each winter, I go through the seed stockpile and magma-dump all the useless seeds.

I would probably try removing the growth_has_seed tag from apples and other unedible/-cookable/-plantable seeds' fruits. Shouldn't take much longer than a single magma-dump round.

[Foxite]

Dear Urist McBitten,

When I put you in quarantaine because you were bitten by that weregila last week, but didn't have "Weregila extract injected in the dwarf blood", I expect you to head to your burrow immediately, instead of hanging around in the kitchen and going to your burrow five minutes before the full moon.

Now you didn't transform into a werebeast, but you have trespassed(probably), and if you get punished accordingly to dwarven ethics, don't say that I didn't assign you to a burrow.

Signed,

Me

[TheHossofMoss]

Dear Friends and Family of Inod,

It is with the utmost regret for me to announce that Inod passed away violently last night. There had been reports of a giant cave spider lurking below (they are certainly confirmed now). Corpses of Cave Crocodiles with puncture wounds in the neck, and webbed troglodyte skeletons in certain areas.

He was probably just collecting the stone that had just been mined out down there. It really could have been anyone. But unfortunately it was him. He appears to have tried to make it to the stairs, but unfortunately, he was webbed.
One of the Farmers discovered his corpse, and to her horror, also the spider. She was nimble, and managed to kite it, left and right, until the militia arrived. She suffered a bite, but thankfully she received no poison.

I can say with happiness, that the militia made the spider suffer, if that makes you feel any better. It was torn limb from limb, and finally its head was caved in by a hammer-dwarf. On the plus side, as well, we are now offering giant cave spider soaps and roasts, if that is any consolation.

If any of you had actually pulled the lever like I asked a while ago, to seal off the caves, this may have never happened.

Sincerely,

Der Meister

[Lord Dalek]

To Kor, Militia Commander,

You were my favorite fortress member this embark.  Your purpose as one of the starting 7 was your proficient teaching skill, and not only did you teach an entire squad to be masters of the sword, you were the most reliable warrior in the fortress, with 4 kills under your belt when most others didn't have 1.  You weren't even of the custom race's primary warrior caste, yet you outperformed the larger and stronger red and black dracon you were teaching in every way.

Is it possible to get this custom race's raws from you?

[Foxite]

Dear all members of the Rain Battalion,

When I order all of you to station in the Great Wall Of Dyemurder that was constructed just for this big fight, I expect you to do it, rather than just sit in the walkway and watch how the 38 goblins proceed through the gate and begin to fight the soldiers. The swords and axe squad barely made it in the fight, however, some of my best soldiers were lost in the war, including the militia commander who was wearing full masterwork steel armor and had dubbed his adamantine sword after the fortress in the middle of the battle. The sword had to be buried with him. I even dubbed him "UberDorf" after delivering the fatal blow in the fight against that massive flying louse beast in the caverns two weeks ago, which had killed half of our military with his lethal dust days after the fight ended.

The commander would not have died if you actually helped kill the goblins. NONE of you actually did anything in the fight. You have had over two years of intensive training, outside the fort walls, so there's no excuses like cave adaption or something silly. You didn't even have to go one step out of the walls in order to access the walkway, and the walkway was roofed.

Please, do as your captain says and kill the goblins next time the goblins arrive.

Signed, your overseer who is going to create a new world after discovering that all dwarven civs in yours are currently at war with some other civ.

[deathschemist]

dear Urist mcSadwidow(er)
your spouse died because (s)he refused to climb the stairs out of the pit of drowning when we had finished building it, there was nothing left to do. While I'm sorry for your loss, could you please refrain from going crazy when your spouse basically committed suicide?

signed, the OVERSEER

[Fperson1]

Dear Urist McBackupTrader:

I know you aren't our actual broker. I know you are only a Novice Trader, and have had zero experience with trading here at Swordboots. I know I essentially drafted you as you walked past the depot since Urist McBroker was on break, and therefore you had no time to prepare. Given the circumstances, I wasn't expecting much - maybe our desperately-needed anvil, a few barrels of booze, a few gemstones for our insane mayor (diamond, I mean seriously, diamond), and a five-or-six-thousand dorfbux profit for the traders, which we can afford because of our metric ton of useless electrum-and-copper mugs.

But there is cracking during heated elven negotiations over a multi-hundred dorfbux shortfall, and there is bungling a trade so badly our fellow dwarves refuse eight and a half thousand dorfbux profit. I do not know what the hell you said to them to get them to reject such a staggering profit, but it must have been impressive. Therefore, you've been assigned to negotiate with the goblin siegers outside. Please report to Restraint #32 immediately.

On a related note, dear Urist McBroker:

Being useful does not necessarily require being alive. Remember that next time you think of going on break when traders arrive. I can find you a comfortable spot to rest in the magma channels if you're so inclined.

Best regards, your apoplectic overseer.