Bay 12 Games Forum

Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Advanced search  
Pages: 1 ... 168 169 [170] 171 172 ... 504

Author Topic: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves  (Read 1557209 times)

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2535 on: November 27, 2011, 07:46:26 pm »
Quote from: Nyxalinth on November 27, 2011, 07:45:10 pm
Dear ponies of Gemgrooves,

Considering I only have the military figured out on the most half-assed level, you guys did great with your first siege.  We lost seven ponies to the Dromedian invaders, but you killed them all.  And as for the Forgotten Beast?  Fine showing!  I didn't think you'd take him down.  I'll be monitoring you all for any nasty effects.  I don't think he had a chance to use his poisons, though.  Thankfully.

Your Overpony

pony = dwarf...?  ???
Logged

BackgroundGuy

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2536 on: November 27, 2011, 09:50:59 pm »
Quote from: Loud Whispers on November 27, 2011, 07:46:26 pm
Quote from: Nyxalinth on November 27, 2011, 07:45:10 pm
Dear ponies of Gemgrooves,

Considering I only have the military figured out on the most half-assed level, you guys did great with your first siege.  We lost seven ponies to the Dromedian invaders, but you killed them all.  And as for the Forgotten Beast?  Fine showing!  I didn't think you'd take him down.  I'll be monitoring you all for any nasty effects.  I don't think he had a chance to use his poisons, though.  Thankfully.

Your Overpony
He's playing with the MLP mod.
pony = dwarf...?  ???
Logged

calico103

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2537 on: November 27, 2011, 11:37:32 pm »
Dear Urist McMiner,

Please do not trap yourself undergr--

...

Dear rescue team...
Logged
This is the bomb!

And it's set to go off in fifteen seconds...

PCpaste

  • Bay Watcher
  • This is how smithing works. (For dwarves at least)
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2538 on: November 28, 2011, 07:40:19 am »
Dearest farmer Urist,

Please, could you PLEASE refrain from eating your crop as soon as it comes off the field? It makes it rather hard to keep the entire fortress from dying of thirst.

...

I hate you.
Logged
Quote from: Oliolli on August 15, 2011, 06:48:33 am
Dwarf Fortress: The only game where an Artificial Intelligence-controlled unit can pull the pants off someone and the proceed to beat said someone to death with said pants.

Eric Blank

  • Bay Watcher
  • *Remain calm*
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2539 on: November 28, 2011, 10:39:54 am »
Dear Overseer McHatefuljerk,

I can't produce enough food for the whole fortress on my own. Make the rest of these baffoons farmers and expand the fields and we might just have enough to survive on.

Sincerely, Urist McSubsistencefarmer.
Logged
I make Spellcrafts!
Quote from: Andreus on June 09, 2011, 02:07:07 pm
I have no idea where anything is. I have no idea what anything does. This is not merely a madhouse designed by a madman, but a madhouse designed by many madmen, each with an intense hatred for the previous madman's unique flavour of madness.

Nyxalinth

  • Bay Watcher
  • [LIKES_FIGHTING]
    • View Profile
    • My facebook page.
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2540 on: November 28, 2011, 02:29:36 pm »
Quote from: Loud Whispers on November 27, 2011, 07:46:26 pm
Quote from: Nyxalinth on November 27, 2011, 07:45:10 pm
Dear ponies of Gemgrooves,

Considering I only have the military figured out on the most half-assed level, you guys did great with your first siege.  We lost seven ponies to the Dromedian invaders, but you killed them all.  And as for the Forgotten Beast?  Fine showing!  I didn't think you'd take him down.  I'll be monitoring you all for any nasty effects.  I don't think he had a chance to use his poisons, though.  Thankfully.

Your Overpony

pony = dwarf...?  ???

MLP mod, and yes, SHE is :)
Logged
Nyxalinth likes the color blue, gaming, writing, art, cats for their aloofness,  Transformers for their sentience and ability to transform, and the Constructicons for their hard work and building skills. Whenever possible, she prefers to consume bacon cheeseburgers and pinot noir. She absolutely detests stupid people.

QuakeIV

  • Bay Watcher
  • Cant resist... must edit post.
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2541 on: November 28, 2011, 02:45:21 pm »
Dear dwarves,

If you had actually fought the goblins, you wouldn't all be dead right now.


edit; DEAR SWEET ARMOK A MY LITTLE PONY MOD!?!  RE-ALIGN THE MAGMA CANNON WE ARE TAKING THEM OUT!
« Last Edit: November 28, 2011, 02:51:39 pm by QuakeIV »
Logged
GENERATION 9: The first time you see this, copy it into your sig on any forum and add 1 to the generation. Social experiment.
I wish my grass was emo, then it would cut itself.
Quote from: Jesus
Quote from: The Big Fat Carp
Jesus, you broke the site!
Sorry, Bro.
link to quote

Hitty40

  • Bay Watcher
  • Poker face, motherfucker.
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2542 on: November 28, 2011, 02:49:36 pm »
Dear Urist McWeedSmoker,

Please. Drop the blunt, get back to work, and clear the smoke from your room.


- The Clean Overseer.
Logged
Quote from: Wannazzaki on December 23, 2011, 07:39:30 pm
Ho Ho Ho! I'm going to be sticking economic stone so far up your stockings, you'll be coughing up gemstone windows!
Quote
You see, when the devil comes on to your forums and begins dropping F bombs and shouts 'GIVE ALL YOUR WOMEN!', he's in a happy mood.
Quote
if there's lots of g's and z's, it's gobbo. If you don't really recognize it, it's human. if it's called Urist, it's dwarf.

Broseph Stalin

  • Bay Watcher
  • Dabbling Surgeon, Proficient Butcher.
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2543 on: November 28, 2011, 02:54:22 pm »
Dear Fish Dissector,

When I forbid everything, cancelled every job, and ordered the destruction of the bridge that would allow the Beastmen ravaging our village to make another pass I assumed you understood it was kind of a big deal. You however decided you were feeling a bit thirsty and instead of taking a few seconds to destroy the bridge then enjoying fine ale and wine from our overflowing stockpiles you decided to drink out of a mudpuddle then maybe get to the bridge later. This resulted in the Beastmen as I anticipated crossing the bridge and placing our fort under siege once again and furthermore resulted in you being horribly ripped apart. In the future when I tell you to do something I mean now.

-Apparently the only person who recognizes the benefits of an enemy free fortress
« Last Edit: November 29, 2011, 02:28:32 pm by Broseph Stalin »
Logged

Loud Whispers

  • Bay Watcher
  • They said we have to aim higher, so we dug deeper.
    • View Profile
    • I APPLAUD YOU SIRRAH
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2544 on: November 28, 2011, 04:01:09 pm »
Quote from: QuakeIV on November 28, 2011, 02:45:21 pm
Dear dwarves,

If you had actually fought the goblins, you wouldn't all be dead right now.


edit; DEAR SWEET ARMOK A MY LITTLE PONY MOD!?!  RE-ALIGN THE MAGMA CANNON WE ARE TAKING THEM OUT!

Dude, they have a cannon. In space. You'd be better off just sealing yourself off from the rest of the universe :P
>Then stage a gears of war like uprising<
Logged

Doughnut189

  • Bay Watcher
  • Tomorrow, and tomorrow, and tomorrow.
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2545 on: November 28, 2011, 04:05:58 pm »
Dear legendary weaponsmith,

Where are you?
What happened to you?
You are dead, yet your corpse is nowhere to be found.

The only dangers the fortress has thus far faced were some goblin thieves.

I've even searched the caverns, but your corpse was nowhere to be found.

I was even going to give you one of the nice bedrooms!

Sincerely,
je ne sais quoi
Logged
Quote from: Talvieno on November 19, 2011, 12:25:28 pm
Imagine you're driving a car. Push the gas pedal to the floor. Close your eyes. Remain this way for ten minutes while turning the wheel at whim. This is Dwarf Fortress.
Quote from: Loud Whispers on June 17, 2013, 03:18:53 am
I don't mean to alarm you, but it appears that your Dwarves are all in fact elephants.

Lordraymond

  • Bay Watcher
  • Doesn't afraid of anything
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2546 on: November 28, 2011, 04:31:14 pm »
Dear Urist McMiner,

The rest of the expedition party is bored, and you're the only one with any experience. I know you're tired, but I don't see how taking a break for an entire season is going to help this fort prosper.

Sincerely,
Your overlord
Logged
Quote from: Monk321654 on April 15, 2012, 12:47:51 pm
Quote from: Karakzon on April 15, 2012, 12:46:57 pm
The question is: how do you profaine a temple dedicated to pure greed?
Give a donation.

calico103

  • Bay Watcher
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2547 on: November 28, 2011, 07:27:25 pm »
Dear Urist McOnBreak,

I don't see how TWO TILES of mining can't be done before you take a break. Yeah, i know you've worked hard. No, two squares of mining is not going to kill you. Get back to it.
Logged
This is the bomb!

And it's set to go off in fifteen seconds...

WolfeyS

  • Bay Watcher
  • My wife just died. Oh, damn nice door that one is.
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2548 on: November 28, 2011, 09:46:31 pm »
Quote from: calico103 on November 28, 2011, 07:27:25 pm
Dear Urist McOnBreak,

I don't see how TWO TILES of mining can't be done before you take a break. Yeah, i know you've worked hard. No, two squares of mining is not going to kill you. Get back to it.


This happens to me way too much.
Logged
My Steam Account
Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Quote from: Loud Whispers on December 01, 2011, 03:01:49 pm
You just know you're screwed when a dwarf dies of old age.

PCpaste

  • Bay Watcher
  • This is how smithing works. (For dwarves at least)
    • View Profile
Re: Note to Urist--In which you express your frustration to your dwarves
« Reply #2549 on: November 29, 2011, 02:13:35 am »
Dear now multiple farmers,

I took the good advice and gave Urist the farmer some help, and gave him more fields. Yet still, you decide to eat the crops as soon as you get to the stockpile, rather then eating the freshly butchered horses or other grazers I can't support.

Please, before everyone, including yourself dies... EAT SOMETHING ELSE.

Sincerely, Overseer McHatefuljerk.
Logged
Quote from: Oliolli on August 15, 2011, 06:48:33 am
Dwarf Fortress: The only game where an Artificial Intelligence-controlled unit can pull the pants off someone and the proceed to beat said someone to death with said pants.
Pages: 1 ... 168 169 [170] 171 172 ... 504
« previous next »