Sorry about the delays! I experimented with a non-traditional (for me, anyway) style of report. It made things take longer (and I'm not sure how well it turned out).
Royal Proclamation, dated 1 Limestone 871:To my loyal subjects,
In light of recent reports of sedition and dissent, I am placing Murdercloisters under martial law. All dwarves are hereby ordered to obey any commands given to them by our soldier. Failure to do so will result in immediate foreclosure and/or liquidation.
Her Majesty Erib Idenasteb,
Queen of the Goblins
Overseer's Log, entry for 2 Limestone 872:As the only "soldier" in the fortress, the recent declaration of martial law has placed the burden of directing the sixteen dwarves of Murdercloisters squarely on my shoulders. Of course, I'm not really much of a soldier (I got the job when a previous overseer handed me a crossbow and declared that I was a captain in the Murdercloisters Militia), but that's fine. This hideous mess of a fortress doesn't need a soldier; this fortress needs an engineer. Fortunately, I happen to be one:
We're suffering from a crippling lack of dwarfpower, and can't afford to spare any dwarves for military duty. I'm filing the paperwork to disband the militia for now, and drawing up plans for an automated anti-siege system.
Royal Proclamation, dated 4 Limestone 871:To my loyal subjects,
As some of you know, I am the legal owner of the capital of The Spiders of Rampaging, and recently foreclosed on it. The eviction is in progress, and any items that the outgoing tenants leave behind will be transferred to my ownership. As such, the export of anything that might help them to carry more of their possessions is hereby forbidden.
Her Majesty Erib Idenasteb,
Queen of the Goblins
Bookkeeper's Notebook, dated 11 Limestone 871:Urist McAnik: What's that off to the northeast? Some sort of horse?
Rovod Zegalath: Oh Sosmil it's a moose!
Urist: Get everyone inside!
[Alarm bells ring]
Rovod: It's coming this way! Oh [indistinct]
Urist: Raise the drawbridge.
Doren Tabarnish: But Ungiz is still out there! He was chopping wood--
Urist: I said raise it.
Ungiz [distantly]: AH! HELP HELP MY SPLEEN OH --
[Moose roars]
Urist: You! Is that a pen? Are you recording this?
Writer: It's my job --
Urist: Give me th
(The entry ends, and someone has scribbled all over the page, trying to hide the text)Overseer's Log, entry dated 15 Limestone 871:A moose that had been giving us trouble wandered into one of our traps today.
One more reason to use machines instead of soldiers to defend Murdercloisters -- they're much more deadly. Work on the drive mechanism of my planned defensive grid is nearing completion.
In other news, we've begun construction on a modular set of living quarters, workshops, and stockpiles that can be separated from the main fortress in the event of an emergency.
Royal Proclamation, dated 4 Sandstone 871:My loyal subjects,
Let it be known that the Minister of Tourism has utterly failed.
His rations of alcohol are to be halved until such time as his performance improves. No dwarf is to provide him with additional beverages of any kind. Violators will be made redundant.
Her Majesty Erib Idenasteb,
Queen of the Goblins
Overseer's Log, entry dated 20 Timber 871:A caravan recently arrived from the Mountainhomes, and we got them in safely. Glacial met with the traders, eager to redeem himself in the eyes of the Queen. Unfortunately, Murdercloisters did not give him much to work with -- we can't offer much more than old clothes at the moment. At least one of the traders seemed to take issue.
"These clothes are all full of holes," he said pointedly, inspecting the goods Glacial was offering.
"It's the latest fashion here in Murdercloisters," the latter replied, without missing a beat. "The Queen herself has taken to wearing her clothes in this style."
He may well have convinced them, as they happily took several wardrobes full of decaying garments in exchange for food, drinks, and assorted other goods. I asked their leader to bring wood with him next time he visits, since venturing outside to chop it down can be dangerous.
Chief Medical Dwarf's Report, dated 21 Moonstone 871:Patient entered hospital at approximately 0930, bleeding heavily. Patient made it to a bed before collapsing and dying. No wounds were visible -- symptoms match those caused by the secretions of forgotten beast type 093-L. Have been elected mayor in light of patient's death.
Overseer's Log, entry dated 23 Moonstone 871:While I don't particularly mourn our Queen's passing, her death is nonetheless troublesome. The Chief Medical Dwarf (now the Mayor) and I have traced her steps in an attempt to locate the source of the contamination. This wasn't too hard.
A pool of extract was located at the entrance to the fortress.
We restricted access to the ramp, and then took advantage of the cold weather to deal with the situation in a more permanent fashion.
Overseer's Log, entry dated 3 Opal 871:We've been having trouble constructing the defense grid due to interruptions by the local wilddeath.
Eshtun Idgusgash offered to deal with them. He has no experience, but the magnificent steel axe he wields seems to be making up for it.
Entry from the diary of Inod Uthmiktekkud, twelve-year-old girl:Oh god oh god oh god today I went to give some water to poor Pisanoa, but when I looked down into the well I saw a crocodile! Which was bad enough but this one was rotting and looked like it was dead, but it was still moving! I was afraid that if I lowered the bucket it would climb up the well and kill us all.
Overseer's Log, entry dated 26 Opal 871:A herd of undead moose rolled in today.
Given the trouble we've had with them in the past, I asked Eshtun to go chase them off if he could. His response:
Overseer's Log, entry dated 7 Obsidian 871:After bugging him about it for weeks, I finally convinced Eshtun to deal with our moose problem. He approached them with a distant look in his eyes
and utterly destroyed them.
Bookkeeper's Notebook, entry dated 17 Obsidian 871:Urist has asked me to take stock of our supplies after the rash of thieves we've had lately.
It doesn't look like they took anything, though.
Overseer's Log, entry dated 3 Granite 872:The Mayor recently advanced the theory that our late Queen may have contracted her fatal illness from infected livestock. All animals have therefore been caged.
Random sampling of some of the fort's clothing supplies suggest that a tainted garment may also have been the vector. I've ordered a complete inspection of all clothing in the fort, and dwarves are forbidden to wear anything containing traces of the beast's extract.
Immigration and Customs Report, dated 18 Slate 872:On the eighteenth of the month of Slate of the year 872, ten (10) dwarves arrived at Murdercloisters from the Mountainhomes:
One (1) Furnace Operator
One (1) Siege Engineer
One (1) Hunter
One (1) Child
One (1) Siege Operator
One (1) Peasant
One (1) Armorer
One (1) Bowyer
One (1) Suturer
In accordance with the Overseer's directive, the last was appointed to the office of Chief Medical Dwarf.
Also present was one (1) domestic pig, to be used for hunting.
Overseer's Log, entry dated 9 Felsite 872:Several weeks ago, our bookkeeper abruptly stopped keeping his books and began speaking in tongues.
He rushed to a craftsdwarf's workshop and began gathering wood from our stockpiles. When he had several pieces of timber (as well as some leather and a few gems), he began working. After nearly a week, he produced this:
It is nice enough, I suppose, but it is a far cry from the early masterpieces such as
Releasedunite the Hill of Danger. At least we have our bookkeeper back.
A Memo for Urist McAnik, dated 16 Felsite 872:Urist,
As we discussed with Glacial recently, producing high-quality, aesthetically-pleasing trade goods is vital to the future health of the fortress. I've been thinking, and have decided that we ought to use the finest metals available to make such goods. Please see to it that our craftsdwarves produce the following:
Best,
The Mayor
Note from the Minister of Tourism, dated 19 Felsite 872:Urist,
As before, I talked up Murdercloisters with the latest batch of merchants.
The elves seemed a bit skeptical, but they may have changed their minds when they saw the twenty-thousand dwarfbucks' worth of goods we had to offer. Thanks for giving me so much to work with.
- Glacial
Chief Medical Dwarf's Report, dated 22 Felsite 872:Patient entered hospital at 1705, suffering from heavy blood loss. Patient died before a transfusion could be arranged. According to predecessor, fatal illness was likely contracted from an organic contaminant secreted by a now-extinct creature that was present in the fort several years ago. Source has been traced and will be permanently quarantined.
Entry from the diary of Inod Uthmiktekkud, twelve-year-old girl:Oh jeez! The Mayor eventually shot the crocodile that had been hanging around underneath the well, but now there's a HUGE rat in there! Rats aren't supposed to be able to swim! Mr. McAnik told me to get over it but I'm too scared to go near the well any more.
Overseer's Log, entry dated 20 Hematite 872:As I was linking up more pieces of the defense grid today, I saw the mayor (out gathering some wood) beset by a pair of skeletal moose that came out of nowhere. She always carries a crossbow, and was able to kill one before it reached her, but the other bowled her over and nearly trampled her to death. She's one tough dwarf, though: she managed to hurl aside the creature, then shoot it in the face as it closed in for another strike. She collapsed after that, and the Chief Medical Dwarf came out and brought her into the hospital. Even if she survives, I doubt she'll ever walk again.
Overseer's Announcement, dated 24 Hematite 872:Citizens of Murdercloisters,
It has come to our attention that many dwarves are defying orders and are still wearing clothing known to be tainted with poison. All non-medical dwarves are hereby commanded to remain in the fort and devote all of their time to bringing any and all non-metal garments to the incinerator. Metal garments will be dealt with at a later date.
The incinerator:
Bookkeeper's Notebook, entry dated 13 Galena 872:Lorbam Iklistonol: Sir! They're here! Dozens of them!
Urist McAnik: Migrants or goblins?
Lorbam: Goblins! They're demanding to speak to the Queen!
Urist: I'll talk to them.
[He walks upstairs]
Goblin Axeman: Who are you? We demand to see your Queen!
Goblin Lasher: Yeah! She turned us out of our homes! And took everything we couldn't carry out with us!
Urist: You're too late, she's dead.
Goblin Axeman: What? Who inherited her estate, then?
Urist: You'll have to check with her lawy-- [He ducks under a crossbow bolt] BLOODY ARMOK, are you trying to kill me?
Goblin Crossbowman: Yes.
[Urist climbs down from the wall]
Urist: You, with the pen: go activate the defense grid.
Overseer's Log, entry dated 1 Limestone, 872:I think it's time for me to step aside -- I'm sick of dealing with all of this paperwork; I'd rather focus on my engineering projects. But, so that future overseers won't be completely confused, here are a few notes about what's going on:
The goblins are still here, demanding that we give up ownership of their capital. Since the Queen didn't appoint any of us as the executors of her estate, or leave a will, or anything, really, we don't have the power to do that. We'll have to get rid of them in other ways. The defense grid is only partially completed, but it is taking its toll:
Analysis of their movements suggests that the completed grid will cause significant problems for future sieges.
Thob Kebonatir recently stopped talking to anyone, except to demand that metal and gems be brought to him at the forge he has claimed. He's got metal, and I've ordered some gems cut for him. Still, best to keep an eye on him.
The defense grid, as I previously mentioned, is incomplete. To finish it (once the goblins are gone), it needs to be deactivated (there is a lever in the dining hall). This will expose a pressure plate on the lowest level of the drive mechanism. It needs to be connected to the remaining spikes that we've set up outside the fortress.
We've also nearly completed a nice "bolt hole" -- a small, largely self-contained set of rooms that can be separated from the main fortress in an emergency. It contains 12 bedrooms, a dining hall, a dormitory that can double as a hospital, space for at least six workshops, a farm, a well, space for stockpiles and a spot to put coffins and bodies, if need be. We've put a variety of useful supplies in there, too. All that's left to do is to finish watering the farm.
The well can't be easily refilled, so the door to it is locked. Also, I strongly recommend that the Emergency Lever only be pulled in an absolute Real Emergency -- simply locking the doors should do fine for your regular old run-of-the-mill emergencies.
There is also the matter of the tainted clothing. Many garments have been incinerated, but it seems that the dwarves refuse to throw out any clothing that is owned by any dwarf. Efforts to restrict all non-dumping activities have not done anything to help.
Said efforts mean that all dwarves will need new orders, as most are currently authorized to do nothing but haul refuse.And with that, I am heading off to give my letter of resignation to the mayor.
Bookkeeper's Report on the Status of Murdercloisters, dated 1 Limestone 872:
Well, that was fun. I seem to be leaving Murdercloisters in marginally better shape than I found it. I left lots of notes, but probably not enough, so you can ask me what things do/how they work if you need to.
Save:
http://dffd.wimbli.com/file.php?id=3352Edit: Improved choice of words
Edit 2: Spelling