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[Dwarfaholic]

Oh, yes, it seems I had forgotten the pre-waiting list. It'll be back next turn.

[Dwarfaholic]

Round 45:

Round Complete.

Acanthus117, Thief^, Karnewarrior: No Action [5], [6], [5]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: OBVIOUS

Well how do you think it went? Perfectly.

Schilcote: No Action [1]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: AUTOSUCCESS

Despite the fact you technically Could Have Acted this turn, you do not. Prudent. Or wait. It was that other one. Silly.

HmH: Physical Attack: Karnewarrior:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: IRRELEVANT

HmH Physical Attack Roll: 5
Karnewarrior Physical Dodge Roll: 2

Karnewarrior Physical Damage: 1

Karnewarrior Physical Health 5/6. You Punch Karnewarrior In The Face lightly, causing a Minor Nosebleed. You then Bring Your Carpet under the Stream Of Blood and turn it around so it is Evenly Covered. You feel you will see the Results of this Action in about... One More Turn of the carpet in your hands.

Karnewarrior doesn't seem too mad about being Attacked, by the way. He just Stares Ahead.

RedWarrior0 II: Acquire Status Effect:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 2

That's just Stupid. You've never even head of A Ninja with his Foot in his Stomach.

Although, of course, such a Ninja would Keep His Existence A Secret...

But Still.

Mental Damage Roll: 1

Mental Health -6/6. A Mouth opens in The Foot.

Father... I hunger... please feed me, it pleads in a Puppy-Dog Voice.
I am blind and deaf. Only you can help me, Father.

Oh this day is just the worst ever. Seriously, What The Hell.

Status Effect Enhanced!
Talking Foot In Stomach: This is so wrong. So very, very wrong. Movement Penalty 3, Charisma Penalty 4.

Events And NPCs:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

The Alpha Object goes through Several Iterations and then Lunges Once More at Thief^.

Alpha Object Physical Attack Roll: 11
Thief^ Physical Dodge Roll: 1

Thief^ Physical Damage: [ 2 * 2 = 4 ]

Another Mind Falls To The Reaper Of Thoughts.

The Alpha Object Iterates a Giant Arm Made Of Blades from it's Central Mass Point.
Thief^ Lunges At The Arm for some odd reason, and is Instantly Impaled. The Blades slowly Cover Thief^, turning into Feathers and then Letters along the way. The Arm then Retracts back into the Mass Center.

Alpha Object Killcount +1! A New Permanent Eye opens near The Mass Center. This one hangs in the air near the Center Point.

New Pre-Waiting List:
7. ReDeadEr: [3]
8. Paranatural II: [3]
9. Ochita [3]
10. Sysice: [3]
11. Rexfelum: [3] Shift own priority*3, rank +3
12. Wimdit: [3]
13. Alcnotorious: [3]
14. Dragnar IV: [3]

New Pre-Waiting List:
7. ReDeadEr: [3]
8. Rexfelum: [Zero]
9. Paranatural II: [3]
10. Ochita [3]
11. Sysice: [3]
12. Wimdit: [3]
13. Alcnotorious: [3]
14. Dragnar IV: [3]
15. Maxicaxi: [3]

[HmH]

Reinforce the carpet with the power of a Karnewarrior's blood, so it can act as a nuclear shelter, too.

[Rexfelum]

Status Effect Enhanced!

Dwarfaholic, I should Never Doubt You.  I will admit that, recently, for a brief moment, I doubted you.  Now I see I Should Not.  Ever.

I will Do Nothing as per what I imagine to be Right and Proper.  (ReDeadEr is in the room now, and I'm at the top of the waiting list, right?  Due to the death of Thief^?)

--Rexfelum

[RedWarrior0]

Master Combat Style of the Gastric Foot.

[Dwarfaholic]

Round 46:

Round Complete.

Acanthus117 II: Enter The Game:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: AUTOMATIC TRIUMPH

It Is Done. You Walk The Path Of The Game, And The Door Opens For You.

You Enter.

Karnewarrior: No Action [6]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: AUTOSUCCESS OF DEATH

The Alpha Object strikes at ye.

Alpha Object Physical Attack Roll: 5
Karnewarrior Physical Dodge Roll: 5

You Dodge the Wheel Of Bone Blades and the Whip Of Eyes and watch with Mild Interest as they are Reassimilated into The Mass. The Alpha Object Prepares for another strike.

Schilcote: No Action [2]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: AUTOSUCCES

For some reason you find it necessary to Wait For One More Turn. Just in case.

Hmh:Enhance Item:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result:2

Karnewarrior's Blood makes a Surprisingly Bad Building Substance. And since you Expected It To Be Bad, it's Just Horrible.

Aww, man. Now your Fancy Carpet is all Bloody And Messed Up. This is so Not What You Had Originally Intended.

Mental Damage Roll: 1

Mental Health 5/6. You somehow Manage a Sad Smiley Face.

 

RedWarrior0 II:Acquire Special Ability:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 3

You Feed The Leg a Piece Of Meat The Room offers to you. It Swallows It In One Piece, and then turns its... mouth... to you.

Thank you, Father. I knew I could trust you. I can always trust you.
You're all I have, Father.

You Cough Nervously.

Uh... yeah, nice stuff that. You know, you're really good at eating, you know, yeah? Would you consider ever, you know, trying to eat someone alive as some sort of attack, you know? For some reason you start Sweating Profusely. Why are you conversing with your own leg through your stomach? When did this day suddenly turn this way?

But Father, I could never hurt a person. Violence is wrong. That's what you always taught me.
Are you saying violence isn't wrong, Father? Are you saying we should... hurt... people...?

Actually, now that you think further, maybe You Don't Want Your Leg To Eat People. It'd be Impolite, And Messy, And Not Too Fast, Either. Yeah. That's why.

Uh, of course not... son guy. You know, let's forget this entire conversation ever took place.

As you wish, Father.

ReDeadEr, Rexfelum: Arrive:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: VARIOUS [1, 6]:

ReDeadEr: The Waiting Room Rejects Your Flesh. Tiny Nanobots appear from Every Conceivable And Inconceivable Direction and Bite Into Your Flesh. Within seconds you are Dissolved, except for Your Skin, and your Empty Husk Drops To The Ground. The Bots Return to their Bot Pod in 9-Space.

Physical Damage Roll: 6
Mental Damage Troll: 5

Physical Health 0/6. Mental Health 1/6. You Perish.

Rexfelum: An Angelic Choir Burts Into Song as you Serenely And Regally Enter The Room. A Nanobot in a Nanosuit brings you a Nanotray with a Nanodrink. What Kind Creatures! Truly they are Servants Of Good. Oh, and would you look at that! They also brought you a Nice Leather Jacket!

Item Received!
Nice Leather Jacket: It feels so soft to the touch, like the cheek of a babe. Smoooooth.

Achievement Unlocked! "Stillborn"
Die the moment you enter the waiting room. That is some bad luck, friend. I feel for you.
But hey, at least you got this achievement!

[Dwarfaholic]

^Round Complete.

[Rexfelum]

Wha . . . wha . . . what did ReDeadEr Do to deserve such a Nano-Flavored Fate?  Is Entering the Waiting Room truly as risky a behavior as Entering the Game Proper?  (Which, as we know, carries a 1 in 36 Chance of Doom.)  Well, thanks for the Nice Leather Jacket.  I presume the Nanodrink has been Nanoconsumed and I should refrain from addressing it further.  I also presume I should refrain from addressing the origin of the Leather in the Jacket.

So, I Address the Alpha Object!  Topics of conversation (in Descending Order of Priority):

1.  Byzantine History.
2.  Utilizing the Nature of the Alpha Object to Grant Me Special Powers.
3.  The Alpha Object's Tendency to Eat People.

--Rexfelum

[RedWarrior0]

I am really getting shitty rolls, aren't I?

Metagame

[HmH]

Carpet-slap Karnewarrior in the nuts for the absolute power that is Carpet-Fu!
And for wetting my carpet.

[Dwarfaholic]

Round 47:

Round Complete.

((In retrospect, perhaps I should make arriving to the room completely safe. ReDeadEr, you will be resurrected at your wish. Please respond between this turn and the next. Otherwise you will remain dead, and I will think 'Knew it' out loud.))

Karnewarrior: No Action [7]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: BOLD, YOUNG ONE.

You Watch Calmly as The Object Strikes At You, preparing yourself against the attack.

Alpha Object Physical Attack Roll: 1
Karnewarrior Physical Dodge Roll: 6

Alpha Object Physical Damage Roll: 2

You Casually Sidestep the Vortex Beam and Kick The Alpha Object in the Time Crotch. It Bends In Half and utters a Cry Of Shock And Rage in the voice of A Thousand Damn Annoyed Souls.

Alpha Object Physical Health ?-2/?

Schilcote: No Action [3]:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: CAR TRIUMPH

You Begin To Drool. Noble.

HmH: Physical Attack: Karnewarrior:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: IRRELEVANT

You Wail At The Warrior with your Carpet Of Ordinary.

HmH Physical Attack Roll: 3
Karnewarrior Physical Dodge Roll: 4

Karnewarrior Casually Sidesteps Again, but Refrains from Punishing Your Groin Region.

RedWarrior0: Meta-Action:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 5

Right, then. So...

Since The Foot is your status effect it can also be seen to count as an inventory item for you. Therefore it counts as a strong-allied NPC.
Therefore you can order it to do things that seem reasonable.

Hey, leg guy. Scoot over in, uh... that direction, you say, pointing to the north.
Yes, Father. As you wish.

The Foot tries to obey your command. However, it also has the -3 movement penalty you have, and since it's natural movement is only 2, it's total movement is -1. Even though it cannot move anywhere in The Waiting Room, which counts as one area, it is possible for it to move negatively. In effect, it moves into the only direction conceivable, which is Back In Time. The Foot Recedes back into your stomach. You're still missing a leg, but at least the awkward conversations are over.

Status Effect Enhanced!
Missing Leg: Movement Penalty 1

Mental Heal Roll: 4

Mental Health -2/6. Wow, you really just... that was just weird. You're not sure you can bend the rules in that way for a while again, at least not without specifying it to yourself in your mind first.

Rexfelum: Interact:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

 Result: 3

Good day, sir! you Exclaim.

The Object points Several Pairs Of Eyes in your General Direction. It seems angry, and Not In The Mood For Conversation.

What do you think of byzantine history, my good man? I hear they produced some fairly powerful mecha in their time, before their destruction in the Eighteenth World Eater Crusade.

The Object seems annoyed that you would Recite Basic History to it. Everybody knows of Byzantine Mechas.

You don't feel you're really making any progress here. Damn.

Pre-Waiting List:
7. Paranatural II: [3]
8. Ochita [3]
9. Sysice: [3]
10. Wimdit: [3]
11. Alcnotorious: [3]
12. Dragnar IV: [3]
13. Maxicaxi: [3]


New Pre-Waiting List:
7. Paranatural II: [3]
8. Ochita [3]
9. Sysice: [3]
10. Wimdit: [3]
11. Alcnotorious: [3]
12. Dragnar IV: [3]
13. Maxicaxi: [3]

[maxicaxi]

Escape

[dragnar]

Hitchhike with maxicaxi's escape attempt.

[RedWarrior0]

O.o
Establish a QUEST to increase my meta-action capability.

[Rexfelum]

Oh!  Well, I didn't consider how the Byzantine Mechas might have been Common Knowledge in this context.  I nonetheless feel that the Alpha Object doesn't need to be Snippy About It.

I Advise the Alpha Object that, if it Knows This Stuff Already, it should Utilize the Lessons of Byzantine History to better resolve its Issues with Karnewarrior.  I believe this would count as an Assist Action.

--Rexfelum