Migrant, huh? That's great, welcome to Ardentdikes. Thanks for joining us. Yeah. I'm Melkorp, the new Overseer. I'm also the manager and bookeeper. Let me show you around, meet some dwarves.
Here's the main courtyard. Oh, there's NotPete, hey NotPete! He's being chased by Iden the Engraver's vengeful ghost through the rapidly flooding courtyard of rotting corpses, vomit, and deadly poison. Yeah, Dariush started flooding it ten minutes ago, just before he, uh, quit. Maybe we should get out of here and go look for that shutoff lever, huh? I could actually use the help because there's like seventy five fucking levers in this fort, ha ha ha! Heh.
Seriously though, let's get the fuck out of here, we're totally about to drown. See you, Pete! See you, Iden's vengeful ghost!
Ok, this is New Ardentdikes ... I think ... It's a little cramped and sprawly and half of it is totally underwater, but on the other hand we have ninety six fucking levers. Hey, do you like rhesus macaque meat? You should seriously have some,
cause we've got over 43,000 servings and if I eat it even one more time I might go -- oh, there's Udib, hey Udib! He's being chased by Rith the Metalsmith's angry ghost. Maybe we should send in the military. Oh, that's right, we don't have a military commander. Got an Arsenal Dwarf though. Yeah, I never heard of it either. See you, Udib! See you, Rith's angry ghost!
Hey, you know anything about carving slabs?I just gotta deliver this note to the Urist McDuck, the Mayor, Dariush gave it to me right before he, uh, resigned.
You know what, migrant? Why don't you hold on to this warrant and, you know, maybe slide it under the Mayor's door when you get a second. Thanks, man. Never open the door though, no matter what he says. Hmm? Well, because he's actually more of a mass-murdering, psycho enemy of our civilization than a mayor. But his mandates are quite reasonable. Politicians, am I right? Ha ha ha!
Seriously, don't open that fucking door, migrant.Maybe
this is New Ardentdikes. We should ask somebody. Wow, that cat has no legs ... here, kitty! Huh.
You're wearing shoes, aren't you, migrant? Good. Hey, do you craft? We've got a great workshop, and wait 'til you see our artifacts! Oh no, wait, we had to wall it all up because the floor is totally on permanent fire somehow. Sorry about all the corpses, we really need coffins but everybody's making steel picks and sewing cloth images instead
AAAA WHAT THE FUCK?? WHAT THE -- Sorry, that just slipped out, huh? I'm a little stressed. Hmm? Oh, you know, typical Overseer stuff. Well, like for instance the only competent member of our military has barricaded himself and his 'manager' in an iron fort with three fourths of our food and booze and booby trapped the only entrance which is suspended over magma and theres a big eyeless dinosaur killing anyone who tries to finish the magma pump, so no one can stop the volcano from leaking into the underground sea of pus, poison, egg yolk and salt which is itself mysteriously draining into somewhere probably a whole lot worse.
Oh, fuck me, the courtyard's still flooding! It was good to meet you, migrant, but I gotta run; if you wanna make make a coffin or carve a slab, or kill a fucking dinosaur that'd actually help me out a lot. I gotta pull some levers.
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Okay, I'm going to take a day to actually read this whole thread so I can better understand how Ardentdikes 'works'. It's running pretty fast, all things considered. If anyone's got a pet megaproject needs completion or just requests in general, let me know because I have no plans and not many clues.