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Bad.

Worse.

Worser.

Zombie apocalyspe bad. Oh. Wait...

[Ochita]

"So you work for the humans. Have they just used me and the thrown me away like a toy that served its purpose. Shock troopers! Scum! Tell Me! Why!"

[xtank5]

"Remind me.  How am I a traitor again?  I was certain that I was following orders as outlined by my commanding officer.  Also, doesn't training a soldier take time and money?  It would be a terrible waste of time and money to kill me.  After all I follow my orders, it ensures my survival, insubordination would probably wind up getting me killed.  I don't see why anyone would kill a good soldier, unless they did something wrong.  So remind me, how am I a traitor?"

[RAM]

>Eat all of the meat at once and transform into a zombie-hulk...

[Cheddarius]

We lost the meat a while ago, and USEC said that it takes a while to regenerate.

[RAM]

I never said anything about regenerating, I just want to go on a good old-fashioned berserker rage...

[Cheddarius]

We lost the meat a while ago, and meat doesn't make us go into a berserker rage.

[RAM]

Fine... keep him talking while you secretly develop head-legs, then jump off of your body and disappear into the bushes...

[Cheddarius]

Contrary to popular opinion, meat does not make you grow head-legs. The "Oscar-Mayer turkey sausage head-leg recall" was an urban legend, nothing else.

[RAM]

No, I accept that we have lost the fresh meat, I mean convert our neck meat into legs, there must be a trope for having a head sprout legs and run around like a spider...

[Cheddarius]

How do you propose we do this?

[RAM]

Umm, well, the super-cells are designed to take over for other cells, so it really isn't much of a stretch to have them modify their function in response to a sudden need for alternative means of locomotion...

[maxicaxi]

Umm, well, the super-cells are designed to take over for other cells, so it really isn't much of a stretch to have them modify their function in response to a sudden need for alternative means of locomotion...

this is quite believable

[Strange guy]

So not that long ago everyone was against Armok's idea of attaching arms, but now most people are supporting head-legs. Does this strike anyone as weird? Nevertheless I'm supporting this, assuming it is allowed. We've basically be presented with nothing but talking against someone who wants to kill us when we don't know why- growing head-legs is the only useful thing we can so.

[Cheddarius]

Umm, well, the super-cells are designed to take over for other cells, so it really isn't much of a stretch to have them modify their function in response to a sudden need for alternative means of locomotion...

Yes. Yes it is.
The super-cells, as USEC has described, perform all organ functions. This means, probably, that each cell has its own waste treatment organelle (because you don't have a liver anymore), its own food processing organelle (because you don't have a stomach anymore), etc. Presumably each cell also has properties of muscle cells and nerve cells, since USEC said that all cells have all the functions you need. So if we were to have head-legs, then they could work; that being said, there is no way to actually grow head-legs. You cannot direct your growth by sheer will.

As an analogy, we have stem-cell treatments available nowadays (though the U.S. is currently shying away). Stem-cells can differentiate. They can turn into muscle cells, nerve cells, liver cells, skin cells, any kind of cells. This means that it may be possible to give signals to stem cells that, for example, order them to turn into skin cells, and then graft the skin onto burn victims. This does not mean you can take a pile of stem cells, put it on your dong, and grow a larger penis through wanting it really hard.

[USEC_OFFICER]

"Remind me.  How am I a traitor again?  I was certain that I was following orders as outlined by my commanding officer.  Also, doesn't training a soldier take time and money?  It would be a terrible waste of time and money to kill me.  After all I follow my orders, it ensures my survival, insubordination would probably wind up getting me killed.  I don't see why anyone would kill a good soldier, unless they did something wrong.  So remind me, how am I a traitor?"

"Look, it's easy. You, um. You see, you did... Look, I just know you are, okay?"

"How?"

"They, they just told me? Alright?"

"Wait, so I work for them, and they repay me by sending a bumbling fool like you to kill me? I bet you you'll be next."

"Do I look like a zombie?"

"No, but you don't smell like a human."

The man looks at you oddly.

Health: 0/15

Inv: Nothing

Equipment: Kevlar Uniform (Tatters)