2nd of Timber, 1054
Those rotten nobles. I don't appreciate crystal glass floodgates enough to make them, do I? It's not MY fault there's not a rock crystal to be found here. Their thick skulls seem blissfully aware of this little fact, so they scream that I'm defying orders. They are feeling lenient, they tell me, so I am receiving an unusual punishment, though. I am told that I must turn some dump of a fort full of lowlifes into something that's NOT a dump by the dawning of year 1056, or I have to stay there. I assume that the punishment is that I have to stay there if I fail, and fixing up the place can't be THAT bad, can it? I'm practically not being punished at all (for absolutely nothing, of course)!
9th of Obsidian, 1054
I really ought not write such foolish things. I have arrived, and this place is even more of a dump than I was originally told. To start, the approach is... unimpressive. The area is surrounded by a wall, but the entrance is a tiny gate on the side that doesn't even point toward the rest of the wall. It just opens straight into a stairway that goes straight down. This passes through what I'm told is some sort of freezing trap. While I'd read of such impressive feats before, it seems that this one only works once before significant work must be done to reset it. Rather shoddy work... but I suppose I'll leave it there, as it might scare an elf or something productive like that.
Walking past the entrance into the main fort, sounds of dwarves shouting at each other can be heard. It seems that the dwarves sent here for whatever reason are none too happy about their condition, and it shows. There's also a mysterious barrel that's taking up half of the narrow hallway, being ignored by everyone. Before descending further into what is sure to be a madhouse, I ascended a winding set of stairs in the back to examine the trade depot, so I could see what outsiders would see of this dump. The path to the depot requires the traders to pass through and hear the sounds of the madhouse, of course. The trade depot itself is overlooked by two eyesores of towers, if they can even be called that. They both have the stairs on the outside, rather than the inside. The orthoclase tower to the right is filled with coffins in its sides, and the microcline tower to the left is filled with... floodgates? Maybe the orthoclase tower was meant to be some form of intimidation, but I cannot fathom what they could have been trying to accomplish with the microline one. I'd order them taken down as my first offical act, but I have the feeling that that could lead to trouble, so I'll have to leave them be. Pity.
Going back to the entrance, there are some seemingly important levers... right by the entrance. Let's hope we don't need to close the gate when an enemy is already here and more are coming! Only one of the levers that DOES have a label (
there is also a label where a lever presumably once was but is no longer -- see my other sketch of this area to see what I mean) actually seems to do anything, and there are two other levers there that I'm told I must not touch. Knowing what I've already seen of this place, that seems like sound advice. There are other unlabeled levers throughout the fort, some of which I can't even hazard a guess as to their function.
Did I mention that it stinks horribly here? They seem to use a large hole to dump their garbage. This large hole is not ventilated, so holding my nose isn't even enough to keep out the stench. When I actually looked down the hole, I added a little more to it. That's not the only place this fort stinks, though. The stench of death is everywhere (
especially the hospital), and blood coats some of the walls. I'm told that only part of it is dwarf blood, which is not exactly reassuring.
Seeing this made me need a drink badly, so I asked where their booze was. The residents seemed perplexed by this question, which baffled me. How could a dwarf, of all creatures, not know where the booze is?! After further inquiry, I discovered that the only barrel of booze was that barrel I walked past in the hallway,
but they were told that they must not touch it. Sigh.
Their farms are in rather poor shape, too. The plots are very tiny, and when I asked about what gets planted where when, I was told an overly complicated schedule that seemed to serve no real purpose. Since I'm in charge now, my first offical act was to tell them to plant their crops on a schedule that's a bit more sane. My second act was to tell the most incompetent planters (leaving the least incompetent, who still aren't very competent at all) to leave the fields alone. On this little walk I noticed a lot of cats and kittens as well, so I ordered that the ones that had not attached themselves to a dwarf be put to death. I would like to see the place completely without cats, but it would be dangerous to try to kill the "pet" cats, so I left them alone.
There are small bedrooms dug out, but only about a third of them actually have beds. I'm told that this is due to a wood shortage of some sort.
There is also a dormitory with a mere eight beds. I'm told that the dwarves here just sleep in any bed they can find, since nobody seemed to even care about making sure the dormitory had enough beds. Since there aren't enough beds for everyone, and since the bedrooms are pretty much just holes, I'll move the beds back to the dormitory.
Relatedly, I discovered that the local guards weren't even told that they were allowed to sleep in the small barracks near the entrance. Speaking of the guards, they're a sad-looking lot. They all seem to be in ill temper at best, and they aren't equipped with anything but the clothes on their backs. Nobody thought to give them armor or weapons. No wonder this place reeks of death.
Descending further down, I found a large room filled with rather mediocre engravings. The residents say it's some sort of temple, though they don't know whose temple it's supposed to be. I told them to start standing around down there when they're not doing anything from now on. At least THAT room can have some minor use now. Speaking of engraving, somebody told dwarves who obviously ought to be doing more productive things to make pictures in the rock, and they were doing as much a moment ago. I yelled at them to stop and go do something useful. They stared blankly at me for a while until I told them to go move things around, since that seems to be all they're good for.
But honestly, I'm expected to turn THIS place into a proper fort? I should have begged for a hammering instead.
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Topic: The Tainted Band of Fools - Survival Game (Read 21812 times)