Right there. Take your own advice. If there's anything adulthood thus far has taught me, it's that there is always work to do. Gotta set limits, even if you have to fight for them.
Problem is chiefly that every single thing on my to-do list is something that I
really want to do, or something I'm doing to get AWAY from my detested corporate work and IN to academia and/or the creative arts--read, something I REALLY WANT to do. I just kind of panic when I see so many things on the list, and end up in a sort of decision paralysis mode. Used to be that when I felt like this I could just ignore whatever homework assignment, take a zero, and forget about it--which is why all my math grades are B's and I'm currently struggling to get into graduate school, despite kicking everyone's ass in class discussions. Stay home from class. But I can't stay home from work, and I can't just fuck around and ignore the fact that I've got a writing deadline for a game in two days (160 short situationally-appropriate worldbuilding conversations!) and an article I gotta write and a math textbook I gotta study. And emails, and snailmail letters, and packages to be sent for VERY IMPORTANT PEOPLE and game design documents and asd;lfjl;asdkjflasjdflkjsdlf HOW CAN I BE SO BEHIND ON EVERYTHING ALL THE TIME
And everything takes so much fucking time because I'm
STILL in therapy because there are Very Clear Signs Of Really Fucking Needing It remaining, which until recently when I got my second job was taking a whole SIXTH of my income (rent was more than HALF). And fuck it, I need to get into graduate school
right now because there are SO many good things contingent on it that I don't want to go without anymore.
like
it's SO important.
But there's too many strains and stresses on my time, and Ludum Dare really set me back on the schedule I'd been following. My sleep schedule is still a goddamn mess :< And I'm dying for company that's
not literally still a child, which is where I spend my time all day every day because I do not get weekends or any days off EVER, and just FUCK.