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[nenjin]

I thought absenteeism and general incompetence was grounds for dismissal???

My company is special. We tend not to fire people and hope/pray people quit on their own. The last person we actually fired was a convicted sex offender/cocaine dealer who neglected to put that on his resume. That's the bar where I've seen people get fired. Otherwise, tension and ill-will generally ramps up until they finally take the hint and quit. My management isn't super good on confrontation.

But don't worry. I'm cut from a different cloth. I fucking _love_ confrontation, and I don't have fucking time or patience for a 20-something who isn't even sure he really wants to work, and I burned my kid gloves a long time ago. So in lieu of my project manager or my CEO or his code lead chewing his ass out, I chewed his ass out and said "You do realize why I'm pissed off right? You do realize that it's complete bullshit when you no call/no show and I have to drag you out of bed myself to fix your own fucking code, right?!?!" I could see both the lead dev and the other junior dev quietly laughing as I tore into him. The whole dev team is frustrated with him and I guess they got some enjoyment out of watching me borderline lose my shit on this kid.

Unfortunately he's got that vacant look I've seen in some dogs, so who knows if it actually got through. But he said "Yes, I understand that it's bullshit." So at least I have him on record as saying that.

It's the curse of a small start-up business. You lack all the corporate behaviors that people loathe....but you also lack the corporate rigor that incentivizes people not be lazy pieces of shit. I wish to god we'd hire a motivated, competent, ADULT coder to replace this kid, but sadly he's the 4th dev in a long line stretching back 5 years on this particular set of software....and he's the only one who really knows how it works right now. So we're stuck with him.

Nice kid, generally speaking, but his work ethic makes me want to punch his fucking teeth out. ESPECIALLY since I'm the one who has to fucking apologize for it and make excuses constantly to customer when it doesn't work. And I'm sick of looking like a fucking fool for his benefit.

[Mustard Elemental]

I often come here to post about something ragey but then see something a thousand magnitudes more rage inducing and don't post it because my rage seems inadequate to justify a post in comparison which in itself makes me rage more because i can't post about it. Recursive rage.

[Worldmaster27]

* Worldmaster doesn't know what to say.

Cmega... I think your mom is an idiot. I hate to break it to you so bluntly, but it is true.

[IronTomato]

You say that like she doesn't already know.

I really hate it when parents do that, mine included. Acting like it's your fault for not doing everyone else's jobs. Son of a bitch.

I really would like to know how your parents can go without seeing all the holes in their logic, and not feel bad for using one child as a scapegoat for everything. Fuck.

* IronTomato inserts his head into a nearby wall

...Don't you have a school counselor or something who you can vent to, privacy garunteed? Even if they can't find a solution, venting helps.

[Tawa]

* Worldmaster doesn't know what to say.

Cmega... I think your mom is an idiot. I hate to break it to you so bluntly, but it is true.

* Tawarochir agrees

* Tawarochir agrees with the solution proposed by Mr. Strange

* Tawarochir also agrees with IronTomato

[Mr. Strange]

* Tawarochir agrees with the solution proposed by Mr. Strange

[Desire to edit post Intensifies]

[nenjin]

More work rage.

So this week has been busy as fuck. My tech support coworker has been on a week's vacation, so most/all of tech support has fallen to me.

And that just so happened to coincide with a massive move of one of our customer's database and software infrastructure across the world to another server cluster entirely, that I was informed I'd be totally responsible for the implementation of about Wednesday of the week prior, after having been involved in exactly nothing up to that point.

So this week I've been working with the IT staff of a Fortune 500 company, the staff of which is based in Brazil while the servers are in Sweden. The customers in question are in the US. Just digest the mental map of that network a minute.

And I've been deploying our software, the backend and the data to three servers simultaneously. The email chain includes 5 people besides me and is over 70 correspondences now. They schedule web meeting at one time and then call me and send me emails an hour early asking "Are you coming?!?!?" All while I'm handling regular tech support as well.

And these guys.......don't have a clue. First off, they completely ignored our sever spec sheet so the DB VM is running on 4 gigs of memory instead of 16. They opened exactly zero ports we asked for so all our shit fails to dial outside to our update servers, our own servers or the internet in general. The production server is so slow it took a WAMP installer 15 goddamn minutes to run. On the other two servers? 45 seconds. It took over 30 minutes to import their data to the production server, when it was done in a minute on the other two. This is the VM that will host an entire business and it's a giant steaming pile of shit, because they didn't read the spec sheet we sent them, claimed they never got it, even though my project manager has now sent it to all of them 7 times a piece. I'm not shitting you.

And the one person I need to talk to the most, their system administrator, is a short-tempered (heh) control freak who would only allow me to start my initial work on the servers using a screen share application and saddling me with a 45 minute deadline before he cuts me off. I had to fight for a Remote Desktop Account so I could remote into the servers and do my work without 4 people breathing down my neck in a conference.

And this guy still is not in the email chains. He's been only on the initial conference call where it became clear his way of doing things wasn't going to fucking work. Yet he's the authority for a) opening the ports we need b) increasing the memory to the server c) administrating the remotely operated Antivirus protection that is undoubtedly killing the connection that our client will use to connect to the DB and do their jobs and d) generally the person who actually knows what the fuck is going on.

Meanwhile, on the conference call today, I calmly explain this to the rest of the IT staff: the project manager, the other project manager, the guy who has boots on the ground doing installs.......and I get dead silence. After almost a minute I ask "So do you think we can make (all this bullshit) happen?" And I get more silence. No one has a fucking clue what's going on. They keep mouthing words "Oh well we tested on the dev server and it worked just fine." Of course it worked fine you fucking jack-a-ninny, you're inside your own goddamn network! Yet we, who are signed into your corporate VPN, using a fucking keyfaub to generate a secure access code, are still locked out! For the purposes of this test, you can consider our experience to be identical to the experience the clients who are about to go live in a week will have!That's the definition of a goddamn problem! FFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKK.

And this is a Fortune 500 company. For god's sake, 3 years ago I was even more of a neophyte to real tech than I am now and you fucking people work for a goddamn Fortune 500 Company, and I'm making you look like you're fucking retarded! That should be a sign you're seriously fucked up. If they can succeed being this incompetent, how far could we go being even semi-competent!

[BFEL]

I know what *I* would tell Cmega's mom if she asked what I was thinking.

"I'm thinking I could strangle you with your ovaries"

But seriously, could someone swing by Honduras (where she listed her location) and kidnap her? We can raise her collectively. Or something.

[Lyeos]

Only problem I'm seeing is that if Cmega's mother did mess up while trying to install things, in all likelyhood Cmega would be the one having to clean up the mess. All I can offer is a hug, but I have a rash from poison sumac on my arms, so I'll have to pass to not spread rashes over the internet. Yep.

I know what *I* would tell Cmega's mom if she asked what I was thinking.

"I'm thinking I could strangle you with your ovaries"

But seriously, could someone swing by Honduras (where she listed her location) and kidnap her? We can raise her collectively. Or something.

I support this.

[LordSlowpoke]

i can handle the kidnapping part, but it's not going to be a one wizerd job

i need intel for the most part

like bucketloads of it

might need a bunch of funds too, while i can supply a little my pockets are constantly drained with dumb shit and resources are expensive

[BFEL]

Well Cmega noted approval for being kidnapped earlier, so that should eliminate the vast majority of issues, and she could well provide all the intel you would need.
As for funds, I am unfortunately not much help there.

[stabbymcstabstab]

I can "borrow" a ore freighter if you need some transportation.

[BFEL]

The Plan. It comes together....

[KingofstarrySkies]

...The team assembles...

[Greiger]

might need a bunch of funds too, while i can supply a little my pockets are constantly drained with dumb shit and resources are expensive

Maybe we could sell the rights to the story to a Hollywood studio, as long as they give us funds up front.  Call it The Cmega3 Trilogy.   

It's like printing money, only more legal.