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[lemon10]

I'm going to side with your brother on this one, it would probably be best to simply apologize for "being rude".
It's usually best when someone demands that you apologize to simply do so irregardless of if you actually did something rude/wrong.
Now, I really don't like to apologize when I haven't done anything wrong either, but that's usually the best course to take.

[nenjin]

*snip*

Did you like, do this in front of said-guest? That sounds like the kind of reaction I've gotten when I've done or said something that's embarrassed my parents in public. Privately, my family isn't the kind to quietly let stuff slide only to come back to it hours later, unless they're so pissed they have to stay quiet. We tend to get mad quickly, and make up quickly, because none of us like holding grudges.

I've been told before that I'm pretty good at hurting people with words, and that I don't appreciate the impact I can have on other people. So I'm a little more inclined to believe that you're not really putting yourself in their shoes. It's clear there's tension that's been building for a while, to the point something minor like that sets your mom off. I mean, when your family senses you don't like them or you're just trying to get them away from you as quickly as possible.....yeah, I can see where they'd find that hard to deal with gracefully. Have you tried just leveling with your mom and assuring her that you do care how she feels? That you're not ungrateful, that her happiness is important to you on some level?

I've always been quick to apologize for what I saw wrong in what I did, because mentally I figure I accept responsibility for myself and give the other person their due of my understanding. Which is actually shockingly rare, I've found. You will not often meet non-family or friends who will meet you half way. You can't ever really count on that. All you can do is acknowledge what you did wrong.

And hopefully learn from it. I'm not chiding you, I've gotten shit from my family for being a loner, for my tone, my attitude, my not seeing how those things affect the people around me. At one point it did totally blow up in my face. Trust me, you can't stop ducking your part in how these things turn out because it will eventually bite you in the ass, even as an adult. Your mom may always be manipulative, over emotional, what have you. You may not be able to change that. But at least you can maybe be self aware enough to change to the degree it makes you a better person. And might have the side effect of chilling your mom out and robbing your brother of something to gloat over.

That all starts with an honest apology, at the very least. Not for refusing her making you food...but for alllllllll the other stuff you know is wrapped up in this. The stuff you kind of admit to knowing is your bad. Don't even ask her for an apology for getting mad at you, because it isn't really about that. It's about letting her you do at least care. At least with my mom, if she has something to apologize for I usually get one in return at some point.

Either way, good luck. 

[kisame12794]

Wake up at two this morning, don't have to be at work till seven, can't go back to sleep. This is gonna be one of those days, isn't it?

[Lightningfalcon]

Ice everywhere.   Tree went through the roof at my grandparents house, so I have to go over there soon to help them.   Here we've had four trees barely miss our house.    We are at the end of our firewood, so we have to go out and get more.    My truck is currently non-mobile, so I couldn't move it away from all the trees it was under yesterday.   As a result there is noticeable dent in it now.    Oh yeah, power is still out.     And walking to my grandparent's house will be slightly nerve wracking, since limbs are still falling every few seconds, and the path there is very hard to walk through, which means we will be stuck there much longer then I would like.   

[kaijyuu]

I'm going to side with your brother on this one, it would probably be best to simply apologize for "being rude".
It's usually best when someone demands that you apologize to simply do so irregardless of if you actually did something rude/wrong.
Now, I really don't like to apologize when I haven't done anything wrong either, but that's usually the best course to take.

Disagree. If you allow yourself to be stepped on all the time, you'll never actually gain the other person's respect.

Talking when emotions aren't high is the correct solution. There are many, many reasons someone might be being unreasonable (including YOU being the one unreasonable), and figuring that out and dealing with it is the best solution for the long term.

Maybe she had a bad day and was venting frustration. Maybe you were actually in the wrong. Lots and lots of maybes. Talk and figure it out.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

Yeah, I'll agree that sometimes you just gotta apologize, but you can frame the apology in a way that makes it clear you weren't wrong. For example:

"Hey Mom, sorry about being snippy yesterday - I was frustrated because I was trying to study for my Psych test."

She can't complain too hard about you being snippy, because she hopefully wants you to study. Also I'd just come out and say that you don't like the neighbor because she's a busybody, that it's ok that your Mom likes her, and you'll try to be polite when she's around, but please don't try to force you to interact with her.

[Lagslayer]

/firstworldproblems

I previously ranted about large swaths of a TV show being cut entirely, but I've noticed another disturbing trend. Shows are being sped up, and it's painfully obvious. Most of it seems to be sped up at least a good 20%, but some parts are sped up in the area of 50%. Sometimes, this is in addition to huge parts being cut out. And they aren't even doing it for actual commercials, but instead cramming in stupid "fake commercials" that just waste time and don't advetrtise anything. What could possible possess them to do this? I'm grossly offended.

/firstworldproblems

[da_nang]

The number of times I keep running into people thinking Σ(a_i)/Σ(b_i) = (1/N)*Σ(a_i/b_i) is true for all (a_i, b_i), b_i != 0, i = 1, 2, 3, ... , N is reaching critical levels.

[MagmaMcFry]

How do you even find out that they think so?

[Dutchling]

The number of times I keep running into people thinking Σ(a_i)/Σ(b_i) = (1/N)*Σ(a_i/b_i) is true for all (a_i, b_i), b_i != 0, i = 1, 2, 3, ... , N is reaching critical levels.

Guys, I think it's trying to communicate with us.

[LordSlowpoke]

How do you even find out that they think so?

finns have since times immemorial used their language as a decoy meant to fool foreigners into thinking they're human beings while in truth they're all robots communicating exclusively in math

and the math is wrong

[Lagslayer]

How do you even find out that they think so?

finns have since times immemorial used their language as a decoy meant to fool foreigners into thinking they're human beings while in truth they're all robots communicating exclusively in math

and the math is wrong

Maybe we should hook up all the Finns to the emerging Skynet and destroy the whole thing.

[BlackFlyme]

This damn project is going to kill me. I feel like screaming.

My partners decided that they wanted to do "research" on our project. Which means they wanted to go to a nearby party-hosting place. First off, they did not know where the place actually was, and there is no simple way of getting there by bus. Second of all, they thought they would be able to enter for free. The place has an admission fee. When I brought this up they said that they would make me pay for them.

Did they seriously think that the place would be okay with letting them in for free, having them screw around on the games and other features, then letting them take pictures of the place in the name of "research"?

I'm glad they eventually gave up on finding the place and we left. But not before they made stops at places like Pizza Pizza and Dairy Queen to take selfies as "proof" that they were working.

So we basically wandered around lost in the downtown area for a few hours today.

TL:DR: Fucked the dog today, and I'm not happy about it.

[kaijyuu]

The number of times I keep running into people thinking Σ(a_i)/Σ(b_i) = (1/N)*Σ(a_i/b_i) is true for all (a_i, b_i), b_i != 0, i = 1, 2, 3, ... , N is reaching critical levels.

This is easily proven by a simple example case of a_i and b_i being equivalent. It would only equate to true for N being 1, and not any other length.

[LeoLeonardoIII]

The number of times I keep running into people thinking Σ(a_i)/Σ(b_i) = (1/N)*Σ(a_i/b_i) is true for all (a_i, b_i), b_i != 0, i = 1, 2, 3, ... , N is reaching critical levels.

This is easily proven by a simple example case of a_i and b_i being equivalent. It would only equate to true for N being 1, and not any other length.

Don't stoop to his level! It's this kind of argument and recrimination that plunges a thread into iniquity.

/firstworldproblems

I previously ranted about large swaths of a TV show being cut entirely, but I've noticed another disturbing trend. Shows are being sped up, and it's painfully obvious. Most of it seems to be sped up at least a good 20%, but some parts are sped up in the area of 50%. Sometimes, this is in addition to huge parts being cut out. And they aren't even doing it for actual commercials, but instead cramming in stupid "fake commercials" that just waste time and don't advetrtise anything. What could possible possess them to do this? I'm grossly offended.

/firstworldproblems

I've noticed that TV shows recap after every commercial break, so you're basically watching the show six times. It's really bad with some documentaries where they show the same footage or photos like 30 times per hour. If I had to write a thesis paper targeted at six year olds maybe I would need to recap every page, but these are shows directed toward people who at least consider themselves intellectuals! I was trying to watch a documentary about a counterfeit Nazi Celtic cauldron thing, and they just couldn't stop being stupid. I had to turn it off.

Of course most of the documentary outlets now mostly do Ghost Hunter reality shows and Shark Week reruns. Eventually every channel is going to be at the intellectual level of "Oof! My Balls!".