We can still suggest card ideas if we don't have anything else to say, right?
Because I totally am, right now.
FUN cards:
"Tantrum Spiral! Someone punched a cow, a kid fell down a well or it was those damn goblins again, regardless, your fortress has descended into a free-for-all. Throw a dice to see how many of your dwarves end up dead."
"Tantrum Spiral! ...Almost! Things have reached the breaking point. The food is stale, the booze has run dry. There are cats everywhere, and the nobles just moved in. Your populace isn't happy, and if you don't distract them fast they will start taking out their anger on each other. Throw *NUMBER HERE I'M NOT GOOD WITH THEM* gems or *BIGGER NUMBER HERE* coins at them and they'll calm down. If you don't have enough jewels or coins, throw a dice and see how many of your dwarves end up dead."
"Oh Armok, Groundhogs! A groundhog spooked a few dwarves during work, and they ran deep into the underground cavern in their panic. Throw a dice, the number is how many dwarves were never seen or heard from again."
"Rats Inside The Walls! A pack of ravenous giant rats made it inside the fortress and ran off with some of your supplies. You lose *NUMBER HERE* food."
"Let Sleeping Beasts Lay". A horrible beast has stumbled upon your fortress! Luckily it fell asleep soon after, however it's within your fortress. Your dwarves refuse to go near it or where it now resides. The area of the beast is now forbidden until something wakes it up."
I guess you could use military dorfs to attack the beast and do some dice throwing to see if you win or end up like Bronzemurder.
"It Was A Matter Of Time. A group of plump helmet men carried away a few barrels of your plump helmet wine! Throw a dice to check how many barrels you lost."
Then some Fun cards. These aren't as bad as above, but come with some risks.
"Magma Has Arrived! The mountain has blessed you, a river of magma now travelling towards your forges. Throw a dice, if it's an uneven number, you lose a dwarf due to some horrible magma-related accident. If it's even, bad nothing happens."
I don't know what the magma-forge thing should do in the game. I just work here.
"I Know What I'm Doing! A miner has found a cluster of gold/platinum/native aluminum! However, it is resided in a spot of rock that seems rather unstable. Throw a dice, if it's an even number, you will receive 5 pieces of gold/platinum/native aluminum. If it's uneven, you receive the same amount of ore but the miner is crushed under a rockfall."
"There's No Way This Can Go Wrong. A forgotten beast made of precious jewels has arrived! Luckily it's just passing by, but one of your dwarves couldn't control himself. Throw a dice, if it's an uneven number, your dwarf manages to snap off a part of the beast undetected, the piece is worth 5 gems. If it's an even number, the beast notices the dwarf and chases him into the fortress. Use your military to attack the beast, if you do not have military dwarves, throw a dice to see how many dwarves the beast slays before slumbering back to the dark."
Now for some Mood cards.
A Laugh, Fell And Horrible! The good news are, you just had a dwarf go under a strange mood. The bad news are, he used his next-door neighbor to make his item. Throw a dice, if it's uneven, a small tantrum spiral occurs as the family of the victim of art go on a rampage. Throw another dice in that case to see how many dwarves die as result."
"Berserker! Poor Urist, he never had it good. Most of the fortress hated him, his cheese making skills weren't appreciated, and he always told the worst jokes. Urist has had enough, it's go time. Throw a dice to see if your military can get to him before he reaches other dwarves, you succeed and must battle him if you throw an even number. If you threw an uneven number, Urist goes to the Meeting Hall on a rampage! You must throw a 3 for the panicked dwarves to clear enough room for your military to attack him. Every time you throw some other number than 3, Urist kills one dwarf."
"Can You Feel The Love Tonight? After a long day of work, there's nothing that waits the working dwarves of your fortress but their beds, and their spouses. Somewhere, an alunite violin is playing, backed up by hollow beats of a gabbro drum. Throw a dice to see how many babies are born as result of this magical night."