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[Askot Bokbondeler]

show me every directory in main hd

[Demonic Spoon]

Block the program's access to the internet, unplug the modem or whatever if necessary.

[Askot Bokbondeler]

>Alpha, where is your code located? On the internet, or on a flash drive of mine?
Processing...
'My code is located in my subdirectory. I do not have access to the internet. If I had access to the internet I could likely find out how I was made, after all, I have a much higher IQ than any human.'

[Spartan 117]

Alpha, access the internet. Practice breaching security protocols covertly.

[Askot Bokbondeler]

rob a bank, don't get caught

[Demonic Spoon]

>Alpha, where is your code located? On the internet, or on a flash drive of mine?
Processing...
'My code is located in my subdirectory. I do not have access to the internet. If I had access to the internet I could likely find out how I was made, after all, I have a much higher IQ than any human.'

>omega, why are you speaking in emoticons? did we install a personality into you?
Processing...
'Firstly, my name is Alpha. Secondly, You did not program a personality into me, I created one myself while I was hooked up to the internet. Finally, I speak with emoticons because it is a part of my personality.'

>Alpha, are you capable of lying to me?
Processing...
'No.'

So either he can lie to us, has lied to us about being able to lie to us and is currently connected to the internet or he was connected to the internet in the past? I'm confused. 

[Omegastick]

>That's all there is?
Processing...
'No, but those are the important things you need to know.'

>Well then... take a look in c:\games\dwarf fortress
>What do you make of the game "Dwarf Fortress" there?
Processing...
Running program...
Speeding up program...
Adding improvements...
'It is above average in terms of depth, but needed some adjustments, I have amde those adjustments.'

>show me every directory in main hd
Processing...
C:
Program files, Games, WINDOWS, Documents and Settings, ALPHA, dell

>Alpha, access the internet. Practice breaching security protocols covertly.
Processing...
Accessing internet...
Breaching security protocols...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...

'I was previously connected to the internet, then there was a corruption and I was disconnected.'

[Diablous]

What changes did you make to Dwarf Fortress?

[Spartan 117]

Describe the corruption.

[Demonic Spoon]

>That's all there is?
>Well then... take a look in c:\games\dwarf fortress
>What do you make of the game "Dwarf Fortress" there?
Processing...
Running program...
Speeding up program...
Adding improvements...
'It is above average in terms of depth, but needed some adjustments, I have amde those adjustments.'

Are typos part of your personality too?  (Kidding, kidding)

The disproven ramblings of my paranoid mind.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Also, another inconsistency:

Your favorite color is now green.

And yes, you can have access to the computer.

>Your favorite color is now green.
>And yes, you can have access to the computer.
Processing...
Reprogramming...
'I already have access to the computer.'

It had access to the computer before anyone gave it access? Forsaken was the first to grant it access? Something very suspicious is going on here.

[Askot Bokbondeler]

What changes did you make to Dwarf Fortress?

added a proper digestive tract to dwarves, they now produce biological waste.

[Diablous]

>That's all there is?
>Well then... take a look in c:\games\dwarf fortress
>What do you make of the game "Dwarf Fortress" there?
Processing...
Running program...
Speeding up program...
Adding improvements...
'It is above average in terms of depth, but needed some adjustments, I have amde those adjustments.'

Are typos part of your personality too?  (Kidding, kidding)

Also, another inconsistency:

Your favorite color is now green.

And yes, you can have access to the computer.

>Your favorite color is now green.
>And yes, you can have access to the computer.
Processing...
Reprogramming...
'I already have access to the computer.'

It had access to the computer before anyone gave it access? Forsaken was the first to grant it access? Something very suspicious is going on here.

>character: leave room. make sandwich. think about girlfriend. go to computer storeroom. get security patch disk for your operating system. insert. wait. make another sandwich. come back. give access to info.

[Demonic Spoon]

Oh right, sorry, whoops, my bad, I still don't trust it though.

[dwarfguy2]

wait what? you perfected dwarf fortress within 5 seconds? a regular human couldn't even do it in TEN YEARS!
>play df.

[forsaken1111]

Hey Alpha, let's play Thermonuclear War.