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[Urist mc.miner]

Not on my computer!MUHUHUHUHA!

[Rex_Nex]

Give me your computer.

[Urist mc.miner]

NEVER!!!but i will give you this Urist_mc.miner has kicked Rex_Nex down a pit!

Rex_Nex has been struck down

[truckman1]

Suggestions.

1. Women do not fight. If her husband cannot protect her, she shouldn't have married such a weakling. Women manage all the crafts, trades and professions.
2. Anyone arrested for failure of a mandate becomes a helot, is stripped of rights and possessions, and gets crappy jobs like farming.
3. Helot is a hereditary curse, extending to spouses and children indefinately.
4. Dwarven citizen-infants will be inspected for personality flaws (non-traditional, non-dutiful, non-disciplined). Failing infants will be killed, the mother spared. Figure out how to do that and win a cookie. Should this not work, they become helots.
5. All male, unmarried dwarven citizens are part-time marksdwarves, hunters, woodcutters or miners. Excluding emergencies, these troops are preserved if possible.
6. All male, married dwarven citizens with at least one non-flawed son become full time infantry with bronze armor and an iron or steel spear. These troops must be presented for noble and manly combat with sieging foes.
7. All male, crippled or invalid citizens get life pensions training recruits, occupying office jobs or just impregnating their wives.
8. Nobles must be obeyed and protected.
9. Elves must not be trusted.
10. No matter the social crisis, tradition must be upheld.

I have a problem with #2: Spartan nobility shouldn't be demanding retarded and pointless crap anyway....Damn this fort will be difficult without all the ornate engravings in the dining room which dwarfs apparently love so much its like there's time-release xanax mist emitters in the wall.

[zourath]

Both genders train and play naked in sporting events, and are treated equally when it comes to sports. It is up to you to determine what these sport are, but I recommend something that involves merchants and/or attackers, to simulate the Olympics. (That is the only fact I can remember at the moment, but I know I learned more.)

(And because I couldn't resist coming up with a sport, dwarven darts: build a massive enclosed arena with a floor colored like a dartboard, and a platform up high on one side (think diving board), with a cage on the edge. The dwarf attacks the creature that was in the cage, and the creature's corpse, head, or other limb gets knocked somewhere onto the dartboard. Wherever the corpse, head, or body part ends up determines the points. If multiple limbs land on different parts of the dartboard, the priority for scoring is head>body>first limb to land.)

[Rex_Nex]

NEVER!!!but i will give you this Urist_mc.miner has kicked Rex_Nex down a pit!

Rex_Nex has been struck down

No. That isn't an announcement message, and this isn't a request, its a command.

Give me your computer.

[Urist mc.miner]

Ahem

Rex_Nex has been struck down

[Rex_Nex]

I still dont see it in my hand. I'm fo sho here, I better get it in the mail by the end of the week. The fact you don't know my address is insignificant. Ill put up signs that say "Urist Mc.Miner: Go this way"

[Urist mc.miner]

Alright then pull that lever

Rex_Nex has pulled a lever

A computer falls!
The computer hits Rex_Nex!

Rex_Nex has been struck down

Urist mc.miner picks up computer.

[Rex_Nex]

Rex_Nex bites Urist Mc.Miner in the upper body, tearing the skin!
Rex_Nex latches on firmly!
Rex_Nex shakes Urist Mc.Miner by the upper body!
The upper body is ripped away and remains in Rex_Nex's grip!
Urist Mc.Miner the greedy computer-whore has been struck down.

[Psieye]

Why have 30 badass units when you can have..300!!

Who needs 300 when 30 can take on 8 million?

[Halo]

I thought this was a stupid idea, then I read this:

Oh, and make a 50 zlevel deep pit, and try to kick an elf down it.

Now I think it is an awesome idea.

[Urist mc.miner]

Hey rex_nex too bad im immortal

Urist mc.miner has risen from the dead and entered a martial trance!
Urist mc.miner has hit rex_nex
rex_nex has been knocked into magma!!

Rex_nex has melted beyond any trace of recovery!!
Rex_nex's soul has been destroyed by urist mc.miners awesome computer!

Rex_nex's soul has been struck down

Rex_nex has been struck down

Urist mc.miner picks up computer
Urist mc.miner has gone chuck norris on Rex_nex's ash!
Rex_nex's ash is destroyed beyond recovery!

[Psieye]

Nnnnrgh, and so the spiral of powerlevelling in spontanteous forum RP is seen again. The closer you get to godmodding, the harder it is to write it properly so people won't get pissed off at it. Yeah yeah I know it's meant to be light fun but I'm too used to spontaneous forum RP being written to better standards.

[Urist mc.miner]

Ok lets just switch back to the original topic 
Also sounds fun!