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[bjlong]

There's also the fact that raising a kid is basically saying "This is a good idea. Don't do this. Make sure you stay out of these situations and get into these situations." Whatever your thoughts about sex, etc., you should be able to recognize that flashing your body about is generally not a good idea. Even after you get a contract for millions of dollars for it, you're still going to be thought of as a whore who makes shitty music.

This is a big "project" for these children--the parents must have gone along with it. It's also being highly praised. For some, it might be the high point of their childhood. What do you think they're likely do when they get to middle school, where everyone all of a sudden gets raging hormones, and self esteem goes in the toilet?

[smigenboger]

I'm going to broaden this question to fetishes in general, since this is leading to this kind of question anyway.

If the supposed fetish is completely commencial, or has absolutely no negative effect on anyone, is it still a bad thing? There are plenty of people out there who are more 'divergent' than others, so I wonder if this debate is just a 'think of the children' (no pun intended) problem. On an objective standpoint, if it harms the child, I'd be against it, but if nothing negative ever comes from it, as much as I disagree with the action, my morals would say there's nothing wrong with it.

For a counter-point, I'd say the problem in this case is the possibility of harm is too great for me to condone this type of behavior.

[Pathos]

For a counter-point, I'd say the problem in this case is the possibility of harm is too great for me to condone this type of behavior.

Pretty much this. EVERYONE breaks eventually.

[Deathworks]

Hi!

As I hinted at before, I think that all fetishes are alright as long as they do not cause directly or indirectly harm to anyone. You can dream about abusing children, eating your neighbors or strangling your wife as long and as often as you like as you do not ever even think about making those thoughts reality. Even considering how you could make such things reality is already crossing the border and is the last chance for you to seek out professional help.

Therefore, I am always very critical about anything that brings any fetishes into reality, even in a ritualized manner. Because once the ritual breaks away, there is no protection from what must never happen in reality.

Deathworks

[smigenboger]

I personally don't have to worry about these issues, though it may be worth bring up if you practice this kind of thing, once you're drunk, a lot of that fantasy/reality differentiation is thrown out the window, so you may as well not get into those kinds of things, and stick to the non-taboo.

I guess that's a matter of your immediate culture and the people you surround yourself with though, so it's more of a morals over objectivity thing. (Saying it myself so others don't have to)

[Deathworks]

Hi!

I personally don't have to worry about these issues, though it may be worth bring up if you practice this kind of thing, once you're drunk, a lot of that fantasy/reality differentiation is thrown out the window, so you may as well not get into those kinds of things, and stick to the non-taboo.

You are actually addressing two important issues there.

First of all, being a responsible adult also means a responsible handling of legal drugs. Personally, I have no sympathy for someone who gets themselves drunk and then beat up people or do some other detestable thing. As an adult, you should know that alcohol removes inhibitions and you have to handle it accordingly.

Thus, I rather see this as an additional aspect those people with problematic fetishes have to be aware of and take into consideration. And if they every get intoxicated and act out the things they dreamed of in reality, at least in my eyes, it is just as if they did so deliberately. No one forces you to get drunk, you know.

Secondly, your post suggests an unfortunate misconception, so allow me to give you the facts as I know them: Real fetishes are not chosen by those who are into them. Whether they are the result of experiences or genetics, a fetish simply shows up in a person without them wishing for it or having any say in whether they have it or not. Whether fetishes can be removed seems unclear - there are some claims that they can be removed, and others who say it is impossible. But what can be achieved, of course, is schooling to control yourself. And that is the absolute minimum that should be expected of any fetishist: If you are not willing to control your urges, then you deserve whatever hardship society hands out to you.

Well, these are my thoughts on these issues.

Deathworks

EDIT: Clarified ambiguous formulation in second point.

[Grakelin]

Hi!

I agree with Deathworks. A lot of literature by sexual scientists seems to back this up. For sauce, please see your local library.

Grakelin

[Jackrabbit]

Oh look, someone else copying Deathwork's posting style as some sort of comment on it. It's not like that's been done about a million and one times and changed nothing.

I kid, I kid.

It's been done more often than that.

[ToonyMan]

Looks like mockery to me and that's bad comedy for me.

[piecewise]

I dunno about deathworks, because I don't read his walls of text, but I would at least agree that fetishes aren't consciously chosen. Saying they are is like saying Homosexuality is a choice. I Know life would be a whole lot easier for me if I could get over my fetishes. Having to slaughter a lamb in the presence of a one breasted Norwegian midget every time you want to get it up is very time consuming.

[smigenboger]

Ouch, that's one hell of a scavenger hunt to get it up.

I believe it's just a matter of classical conditioning, both going in and getting out of one. I wont touch the homosexuality debate, but an object or paranormal fetish was probably classically conditioned, and could go away through disuse, or just pairing up your happy time with different triggers.

I don't know about children, I don't have that interest and I don't know anyone who does, but I could only assume realigning your sexuality with older people would fix that up, if you wanted to fix it. I understand there's more going on here than that though, and there may be a spattering of yearning for your childhood, or hanging on a bit of trauma, or something too.

[Leafsnail]

I have heard that people who are abused as children are more likely to abuse children when they're older.  It seems to be the case when they break up paedophile rings sometimes.

[Agdune]

It sure is the case, unfortunately. It's not unavoidable and doesn't happen all the time but generally, the worse and longer term the abuse, the more likely they will end up abusing others themselves. Kids are just the most vulnerable and have a bit of a ring of familiarity to them. It's sortof an unconscious way to regain power over other people after having it taken off them so traumatically.

Not that all paedophiles/child sex offenders were abused. And afaik, there's no evidence that fetishes are instilled through classical conditioning methods, so trying to repress them or realigning them generally leads to imbalance and/or the occasional explosion of unwanted behavior as they relapse. Or at least, I'd assume it would lead to unwanted behavior when their self-imposed mental blocks stop working.

[zchris13]

I would like to mention that masturbating is stroking yourself, not having someone else stroke it for you.  That would fall under "getting a handjob", thank you very much.  (I'M LOOKING AT YOU DEATHWORKS)

[Oglokoog]

I would like to mention that masturbating is stroking yourself, not having someone else stroke it for you.  That would fall under "getting a handjob", thank you very much.  (I'M LOOKING AT YOU DEATHWORKS)

I think that "to masturbate someone" is completely valid. Just let me use my awesome internet skillz to check, though...