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[Bingbing]

Darn. Out of the 26 ninjas I have, all they managed to bring me was the adamantine long sword "Forgotten Whispers of Lost Dead". Only reason they found that was because it was in the river about 5 steps away from the dwarves.

Wait. I only have 25 ninjas! And what's with the *gold ring* on the new one?

Anyways, the dwarves finished the tower, which was just one floor tall and thus isn't really a tower at all. I tell the dwarves to start farming wild strawberries.

Lastly, I spend the 100 points on a flying elf elephant dragon carp. I give him the artifact adamantine longsword.

[MindSnap]

Query of Bingbing: how do you know that you have an extra ninja with a golden ring?  Unless it is a different ninja with a different gold ring, the aformentioned one is SO invisible (ninja obscurity + possibly greater ring of power invisibility) that it may not even exist anymore?

As an entering Lurker, I Arbitrarily administer the articles concerning alliterative titles and their ensuing consequences - All players must now take an alliterative title, and accept the consequences of said title.

I for one take the title of "Illuminated Illuvitar, the ispiringly insipid imp" and accept the consequence of owning everything in any way related to top, middle or bottom earth, including 49% of a certain undead ghost-ninjah that happens to be an elf. With ninja stars.

However, as it's location is still unknown, the ninja gains the intrinsic ability to exist anywhere, at any time, and because of the heisenburg uncertainty principle, as his location is unknown his speed may be ascertained, which is equal to warp e. Warp has it's own problems... Specifically, as the star trek universe cannot co-exist with the dwarf fortress one, and the DF universe is rather more applicable in this situation, warp does not exist. Because warp speeds are greater than the speed of light, the ninja has it's speed parsed down to light's and because of special relativity, time is at a standstill for the ninja and it cannot decide where to go with ti's infinite speed. However, if time EVER starts again it is sure to flip out and kill EVERYTHING, effectively murdering all non-undead in play.

As a joining player, I also introduce my new power-broker to Dr. Cthulittle and propose an alliance in exchange for his unswerving serfdom.

In addition, I will give my powerbroker the alternative title of "powerborker" in the event that he deserves it.

This title has been decided in the most fair way possible, namely the magnificent typo.

As you can see, the human trade representative will eventually find my powerbroker/powerborker, and so no human invasion eventually arrives. When the twain meet, I will decide on the importance (and therefore multiplier on cost) of importing new items into the play area.
(this may seem heavy-handed, but such costs were arbitrary to begin with. such is dak)

I realize that I have not specified the source of these rules, which all (except the titles, whose source should be obvious) stem from the fundamental universe that has given rise to the grand game of tacticus.

Question: Do I get points for owning a possibly greater ring of power in the ownership of an infinitely indecisive ninja? As i only own 49% of the ninja, which owns the ring itself (which owns 49% of the ninja), I only get 49% of said points, if I even get them.

[ November 13, 2007: Message edited by: MindSnap ]

[Dwarven Malcolite]

quote:Originally posted by CharonX:
<STRONG>
Dwarven Malcolite: I have consulted the appropriate reward table for non-dwarven characters on page 143 and your cat has the choice of the following rewards:  A *carpbone thong*, a *spidersilk yarnball*, an =obsidian toydwarf= or a live !!lungfish!!.

[ November 12, 2007: Message edited by: CharonX ]</STRONG>

You missed the fact that I ceded the cat to my ally. Although, since in the interim the cat is on its own, it can, and does, chose to activate the special index table linked to by the entry on what to do if the claiming character is non-player controlled, which allows it to combine the rewards. As such, the Cat is now the proud owner of a *Live Carpsilk Yarndwarf*
I'm sure that the cat and its new pet will soon do something interesting.

In the meantime, The map is missing my ballista. As such, I invoke the Law of Unconfirmed Locations, and declare that the ballista is in a position such that it can be fired at the accountant, hopefully removing him from the game while he attempts to figure out what tax codes apply to a rapidly oncoming Iron Bolt. This is, of course, in full accordance with the Uncertainty Principles outlined above.

After firing the weapon, the Ranger shall !!ignite!! the ballista, then go into ambush mode and sneak towards the goblin towers. Didn't we notice the goblin towers located a mere half-screen away?

Also, I order my woodcutter to start the production of Wooden Weapons. This is a legal choice, as decreed by the 659 Games of The Ironbay Abbey-Trials of Garters, where it was decided that if part of the option could be obstructed to form a new option, the new option could be built. We'll see what he comes up with in a few turns.

Finally, I spend .4 of my points to cast mass !!ignite!! on all blood on the map, which are now !!blood!! This move is based off the notorious Golden Tablesalted The Crystal Councils of Toga defense, which was instrumental in the victory of Urist Cableclaws the Shining Tigerforge over all comers at Leanforged, a cave, in 1023. Let us see how that turns out, shall we?

Oh, and per he articles concerning alliterative titles and their ensuing consequences I adopt the alliterative moniker of Crazy Cultist Calling Crafty Cats; Caves can count canny camels. This allows me to influence the minds of any cultist on the field, including those of the small vermin joining the multidimensional 2 foot horror. Sadly, I lack the points to do so at this time. The title also causes all camel cheese to rot the moment it gets on the map unless within a natural cavern. It may also render me and my units immune to felines but cause them to suffer allergic reactions of various intensities.

Cat: Mew? Mew!

Ranger: Fire! !!Fire!! Hey, goblin towers! I think I'll explore and see if I can find any trinkets lying around...

Woodcutter: I think I'll construct a wooden weapon -----. With my Axe! x112.92

Blood: Silently burns.

Currently In Control of:
1 Sneaking Ranger
1 Woodcutter, currently carving.
1 Iron Ballista Bolt flying towards the accountant at high speeds
a !!Oaken Ballista!!
the carpenter's workshop
.4 points
not my sanity, sadly.

[ November 13, 2007: Message edited by: Dwarven Malcolite ]

[ November 13, 2007: Message edited by: Dwarven Malcolite ]

[Vengeful Donut]

Question: are we allowing the expansion to first edition entitled "The Ambiguous Self-referencing Meta-rules of Tacticus"? Many of the tacticus games I've played have banned this book because it led to too many fights over rule interpretations, so I want to be sure we're allowing it before I cite anything from it.

[Fenrir]

quote:Originally posted by Vengeful Donut:
<STRONG>Question: are we allowing the expansion to first edition entitled "The Ambiguous Self-referencing Meta-rules of Tacticus"? Many of the tacticus games I've played have banned this book because it led to too many fights over rule interpretations, so I want to be sure we're allowing it before I cite anything from it.</STRONG>

Where'd you get a copy of that?! I didn't think merchants carried that volume anymore.

[Blargh]

quote:Originally posted by Fenrir:
<STRONG>
Where'd you get a copy of that?! I didn't think merchants carried that volume anymore.</STRONG>

Now you're learning.

I've just spent 30 minutes writing a very good turn, however, my browser crashed and I lost everything as I was writing THE FINAL SENTENCE.

Therefore, I submit my forfiture in a state of rage, and invoke Rule 11-B/11-C subsection alpha "The rule of Ultimate Assumption". By this rule I am assumed to have achieved no less than second place, possibly first at the conclusion of this game of Tacticus.

Now it's only a matter of if games of Tacticus are ever concluded.

[MindSnap]

quote:Originally posted by Blargh:
<STRONG>
I've just spent 30 minutes writing a very good turn, however, my browser crashed and I lost everything as I was writing THE FINAL SENTENCE.</STRONG>

Ouch. I feel your pain. I find this forum's posting areas to be difficult to write in, so if I'm writing a large post I use notepad, or even word to spellcheck.

Are Blarg's assets now dealt with by the "up for grabs", "autonomous" or "auction" rules as per version 8's "player loss" section? (say what you will, but version 8 had solid conflict resolution and player loss rules(as in blood loss, not losing))

That also kind of puts a damper on an otherwise extremely lively game.

[Xotes]

I summon 1 dwarf from a different dimension, invoking rule A.9319 or "Summoning of various creatures. Where from, we don't care."

Said dwarf is a hammerdwarf, and takes control of the trade depot to pre-empt anyone elso stealing it first. However, this delays my kobold army AGAIN by another turn, as they all fall down various holes and spend said turn climbing out.

[ November 13, 2007: Message edited by: Xotes ]

[Jimbo8250]

I hereby join the game and trade my starting resources for 1 Hammerdwarf and my choice of an item from "Curiously Randomly Named Randomly Useful Randomness."

I choose the Banhammer, which automatically inflicts a mangle on any flaming objects it hits, at the cost of removing the fire from that object.  It also has the effect of making all Trolls now ignite objects when either raging or throwing things.

Citing the Oversilk Decision in the Third Masterwork Tournament of Oventurnip Round 83: Day 207, this also means that anything hit by an object thrown by a Troll to ignite to such a degree that it will take an amount of board resets equal to the absolute value of the difference of ninja and non-ninja units at the time of ignition before the flames go out.  However, if the number of undead are greater than the total number of ninja and non-undead non-ninja units, then all ninja are instead ignited.

However, I must query as to use of the "!!My Board is on Fire!!" rule found on page 287.93 in the "Lava, Magma, and You" supplement.  If that applied, then setting the ninja on fire in this manner means that the ninja lose their sneaking abilities but instead ignite anything within 2 spaces of them or even targeted by one of their ranged attacks.  However, if we choose to ignore it, then that means that Magma Men can gain sneaking abilities of Ninja if the Magma Man kills the Ninja without either touching the other.

I conclude my turn by giving my Hammerdwarf 2 wineskins and 4 Horse Meat Roasts, thus granting him immunity to elven snideness until he is struck by an arrow (on account of him not possessing anything made of wood, if struck by an arrow then the "Injuries and Ammunition" rule in "How to Benefit From an Idiot Military" comes into play and I possess that arrow, which is made of wood).

Also, I request a ruling on the Grand Vizer decision of 326.

[Greiger]

I join the game, and using the "I like dragons version 2.17 revised turbo edition" rules I summon a dragon and a cake.

As my opening move the dragon using the "basic actions noone thinks of" clause eats the cake.  And using the "Quotes that I don't know the origin of" rule on page two of this pack of post it notes, the caek is a lie.  The dragon gets sucked into a black hole created by the non-existant caek and is removed from play.  The Black hole collapses before doing further harm.

I also invoke the "Greiger hasn't had his Dr Pepper" rule giving me (2/1¼-3)*0 points per typo or grammatical error.  I end my turn.

Beat that.

[MindSnap]

I see a disturbing lack of alliterative titles...

[Kyselina]

I activate my special effect, "Invisible AFKER", it enables my units and items to be invisible if I don't post in this forum for longer than 3 hours.

[Fenrir]

I spoke with the local trader and he exchanged a few -wooden idols- that I made for a Tacticus Master Set, Edition 351 Felsite, and a Viking Myth Expansion. I was looting the corpse of a kobold thief one of the guards had slain and found "The Rules of Tacticus or the Lack Thereof" (the transcript with the hoary marmot leather cover, not the original rubbing), which was probably stolen from some other fortress. Kobolds don't know about Tacticus, despite many a stolen tome on the subject. Can kobolds even read?

EDIT: As for my move, I'll play next game. There's just too much going on already to keep track.

[ November 14, 2007: Message edited by: Fenrir ]

[Bingbing]

Reply to Query: It doesn't matter how invisible you are if people can see your shadow. Also, I actually don't know the ring's material. It could just be a XXcopper ringXX or artifact gold ring or even adamantine ring for all I know.

Anyways, I send my flying elf elephant dragon carp to cut the ring off of the ninja's finger, and I then give the 9-fingered ninja to Mindsnap. I herby get total ownership of the ring and half of the points, whereas you get the other half of the points and the ninja.

The dwarves have just discovered a lone ore of adamantine on Z-2. This is amazing! Also, the weaponsmith entered a secretive mood. Thankfully, he just needed a metalsmith forge. Let's see what we get.

[Gulfd'An]

i now use the points i have for owning the grove to buy a flood gate named Stan (to see how it gets its name read the comic im making when IM done)
but due to having forgotten that due to rule 18793 of "things and such no one reads" (i never read it but it may or may not be the following) any player in possession of a named mule who has not killed a adventurer imports its items directly from the giants.

oh my.... it seems Stan the over sized flood gate has just crushed my mule and his minions... it is now named "Stan martyr of Manhattan" and because of his size has taken over the grove and surrounding areas just by appearing.
i end my turn and will wait till i have enough points to use "the special thing" referred to in "tacticus for dummies (and owners of large flood gates named Stan martyr of Manhattan)"