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Author Topic: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION  (Read 19515 times)

Dave Mongoose

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #120 on: May 15, 2010, 08:27:25 am »

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Epic.
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Fault

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #121 on: May 15, 2010, 01:16:53 pm »

Haphaestus was cast out of olympus for being lame
but haphaestus was a dwarf! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT

Vester

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #122 on: May 16, 2010, 08:29:04 pm »

Zeus is an elf.
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Aklyon

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #123 on: May 16, 2010, 09:28:51 pm »

Zeus is an elf.
if the elves have Lightning, then the dwarves have...War? (Ares)
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Crystalline (SG)
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Quote from: RedKing
It's known as the Oppai-Kaiju effect. The islands of Japan generate a sort anti-gravity field, which allows breasts to behave as if in microgravity. It's also what allows Godzilla and friends to become 50 stories tall, and lets ninjas run up the side of a skyscraper.

Sensei

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #124 on: May 16, 2010, 10:39:04 pm »

No, there was a crafting god who was ugly- garr, can't remember the name! Elves should be apollo (he he had the bow right?) or Hermes. Goblins probably follow Loki, and Kobolds are scientologists.
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Fault

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #125 on: May 16, 2010, 10:49:21 pm »

I've been thinking of doing a Deonideas story featuring elf and dwarf analogues, but high fantasy races don't fit very well in a swords and sorcery setting, so I've been looking for ideas in old pulp magazines - stories of like, strange subhuman civilizations or lost races from underground. Usually with really weird names.

Urist Imiknorris

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #126 on: May 16, 2010, 11:11:39 pm »

Kobolds are scientologists.

Except without the legal paranoia.
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Sensei

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #127 on: May 16, 2010, 11:24:58 pm »

No wait, actually, they're Dadaists. They'll tell you they're scientologists if they decide to use real words (namely, once you least expect it) though.

Kobold: "Jreengus fasi lokujorum ba."
Adventurer: "Dammit, can you say ANYTHING?"
Kobold: "Waga na weeeeewp."
Adventurer: "I don't know why I'm even trying this is pointless."
Kobold: "I'm a scientologist."
Adventurer: "Wait what? What the hell?"
Kobold: "Jreengus."
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Aklyon

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #128 on: May 17, 2010, 11:40:37 am »

No, there was a crafting god who was ugly- garr, can't remember the name!
Hephaestus?
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Crystalline (SG)
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Quote from: RedKing
It's known as the Oppai-Kaiju effect. The islands of Japan generate a sort anti-gravity field, which allows breasts to behave as if in microgravity. It's also what allows Godzilla and friends to become 50 stories tall, and lets ninjas run up the side of a skyscraper.

Siquo

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #129 on: May 17, 2010, 01:48:27 pm »

Hephaestus did date the ultimate chick for a while, though, as I remember. Until she cheated on him.

I don't remember with who, but here's a nice story:
With DEONIDEAS!
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This one thread is mine. MIIIIINE!!! And it will remain a happy, friendly, encouraging place, whether you lot like it or not. 
will rena,eme sique to sique sxds-- siquo if sucessufil
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EagleV

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #130 on: May 17, 2010, 01:54:27 pm »

Hephaestus did date the ultimate chick for a while, though, as I remember. Until she cheated on him.

I don't remember with who, but here's a nice story:
With DEONIDEAS!

Well, either you're right or we're both wrong. She cheated on him because he was ugly as hell, so he build an artifact cage (or net) trap around the bed. A day later, his wife and her secret lover were naked in a cage in the middle of mt olympus, to teach them not to mess with Urist Hephaestos. Or something like that.
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Third, stop listening when you should be fighting.

Siquo

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #131 on: May 17, 2010, 02:17:59 pm »

DEONIDEAS - Rewriting Greek mythology since 1000 BC.
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will rena,eme sique to sique sxds-- siquo if sucessufil
(cant spel siqou a. every speling looks wroing (hate this))

Fault

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #132 on: May 17, 2010, 05:04:37 pm »

Hephaestus did date the ultimate chick for a while, though, as I remember. Until she cheated on him.

I don't remember with who, but here's a nice story:
With DEONIDEAS!

Well, either you're right or we're both wrong. She cheated on him because he was ugly as hell, so he build an artifact cage (or net) trap around the bed. A day later, his wife and her secret lover were naked in a cage in the middle of mt olympus, to teach them not to mess with Urist Hephaestos. Or something like that.

it was ares, the god of war, whom haphaestus caught with aphrodite (his wife) when he sprung the net trap. He later put the trapped lovers on display in an attempt to shame them, but aphrodite liked the attention, so his plan didn't really work.

poor haphaestus.

Siquo

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #133 on: May 17, 2010, 05:19:51 pm »

DEONIDEAS is kind of like Ares. Big, masculine and not the sharpest tool in the shed...
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This one thread is mine. MIIIIINE!!! And it will remain a happy, friendly, encouraging place, whether you lot like it or not. 
will rena,eme sique to sique sxds-- siquo if sucessufil
(cant spel siqou a. every speling looks wroing (hate this))

Soadreqm

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Re: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION
« Reply #134 on: May 17, 2010, 05:48:18 pm »

Poor Hephaestus. He spends all his time crafting wondrous artifacts for the other gods to use, and they all treat Him like some kind of troglodyte. He forged Zeus' lightning bolts. And probably invented fire.

By the way, His deformities correspond to the symptoms of arsenic poisoning, which was an occupational hazard at the time to smiths who worked with bronze.
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