Deonideas and the Woman of Fire by Gritt SäwtrunkThumb, thrum. Thrum, thrum. Tunda, tunda, thrum, thrum.
The beats of jungle drums focused his mind, and he looked through dew soaked leaves. Wildcats and strange bugs had harassed him for days. Now he was within earshot of his quarry. Tunda, thrum, and he moved ever closer to their still beating hearts. Hearts that would not be beating for long. His weapon long since abandoned, and forgotten in a meatbog. It was some kind of magic axe. He didn't give a shit as he moved to the throat of the jungle procession. He was never unarmed.
Thumb, bum, bum. The priests' beat was summoning the spirits for protection. The jungle was dangerous, even for the well prepared. Deonideas grabbed hold of the stalk of a jungle tree. As it was pulled from the ground its roots tried in vain to grip the sod earth. Into the air it rose, and the nature of the men in the jungle was revealed. They were men wearing masks of fresh hyena leather, and horse heads. They carried two coffins through the narrow jungle path. Standing atop the lead coffin was their leader, the werecrocodile Amombabåd. The tree's flight lead it into the halfman, and made him fly from the coffin to the mud.
The priests ceased their beating drums and looked towards Deonideas, the clouds began to darken. A single, silver stream of light came down from the clouds, and encircled the read coffin. Deonideas had no time to take his focus off of what he was doing. Three of the priests rushed forward to him. The lead priest reached him first, drew a knife, and found his first attack blocked. Deonideas had taken his hand, and crushed its bones around the knife until the two were entwined. He ripped the arm from the priest, and declared to the world, "This is my knife flail." The second priest to reach Deonideas was cut clear across the face, and dropped to his knees in pain. The third peed himself, and ran into the jungle.
Amombabåd rose from the mud as a giant crocodile. His front teeth had grown so large that he couldn't close his mouth entirely. The manbeast let out a feral roar that made even his priests run in fear. They were alone on the battlefield, the two men of long names. Amombabåd began a running charge towards Deonideas. When he had closed the distance, the man tucked to the side and rolled. He unleashed the knife flail on the croc's sides, but to no avail. The werebeast had a skin as thick as four crocodile skins. The knife only breached two of them at any time.
Amombabåd turned to bite Deonideas, but the man grabbed the werecroc's front teeth. He pulled them out by the root, and leaped onto the beast's back. He turned, and planted the teeth into Amombabåd's eyes. He held tightly to the croc as it became a giant flail in and of itself. The beast flailed around for a minute. Deonideas watched the battlefield change slightly in that time. An angel of the fire god Azure Asflamebaits was descending upon the rear coffin. Amombabåd was rapidly approaching the lead coffin. Amombabåd's mighty tail blasted the lead coffin open.
Thrum, thrum, abumbum. The sound of drums was once again heard, and then fell silent. Deonideas watched as something rushed from the coffin onto the tail of the werebrute. It was another minute before the beast had slowed enough for Deonideas to see what it was. There was a man on the beast's tail, and he was drinking from a giant cut. The man raised his head, and blood mixed with saliva dripped from his mouth to the ground. The vampire spoke in wisps of battered air, "Freedom, oh sweet freedom has long been denied me."
"I will deny you your undeath," Deonideas said as he pulled the teeth from the beast's eyes. Gore came with them, marking them as true knifes. Amombabåd breathed shallow beneath the two of them.
"When I'm finished with you, there is a female fire angel that was once to be my sacrifice in that coffin," the vampire said. "With her blood, I will be invincible. Invincible!"
The male fire angel which had been standing atop the rear coffin spoke in roars, "I will never allow you to do that!"
Deonideas didn't give a shit about either of them. He lunged at the vampire with his knifes, and each of them found their place. Deonideas was on the other side of the vampire as its head thudded against the ground. He dropped the knifes to the ground as the acidic blood began to eat them. He reached behind him, and grabbed Amombabåd's tail. In two tugs it had come free of its master, and gusher of blood began to pour from the tears in the backside of the beast.
The fire angel turned to the vampire's head as it magically floated up to a man's height. "By the power of Azure's sunlight!" The angel fired a beam of true light at the undead monster. As the sunlight began to pour over the beast, sparkles began emanating from the skin of the monster.
"Your sunlight has no power over me!"
"Some day, someone will make a sport of this," Deonideas said as he took the werecrocodile's tail, and batted the vampire's head to the sky. It disappeared into the distance. It took nothing for Deonideas to resist the urge to run around in a circle.
The fire angel approached to congratulate him. Deonideas took the werecroc's tail, and beaned him in the side of the head. He only had to beat the angel for a few moments before he heard a crunch that was the angel's ribcage imploding. Deonideas tossed the flaming croc's tail to the side.
Deonideas approached the rear coffin. Its mahogany lid parted from the frame in a single fluid motion. The glow from inside was the only light left as the beam of sun from the heavens disappeared. Azure knew he'd claimed his prize in fair combat. The clouds were blackest black, and rain began pouring down in waves. Deonideas tossed the cover the side, and gazed on his prize. She had the skin of a human, but colored in light red with yellow and blue whirls. Her hair was silver, and streaked with yellow. She was naked as the day she was born, her skin steamed as water poured onto it. She threw a hand up to hide her ample breasts, but Deonideas had seen enough.
"You're mine, now."
She shot him an incredulous look.
He didn't smile.
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I hope that's worthy of a cover, or something.
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Topic: THE EPIC OF DEONIDEAS - MANLY FANTASY FICTION (Read 19564 times)