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Hook up FAILCANNON to magma sea (powered by a huge dwarven reactor).

11 (28.2%)

Build a castle over the fortress entrance.

11 (28.2%)

Flush all the grime from Battlefailed with carefully arranged sewage system.

7 (17.9%)

Construct opulent quarters for every dwarf in Battlefailed.

3 (7.7%)

Get rid of every Forgotten Beast using huge cave-in traps

7 (17.9%)

Total Members Voted: 39

Voting closed: July 31, 2010, 02:35:48 pm

[Zathel]

Ok, here I go...

***

Seasonal Development Progress Report, year 506, form BRT-325, in accordance to 3rd Directive of Bureau of Colonization
Fortress name: Battlefailed
Fortress status: Outpost
Bookmaster: Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul

Due to illness I was suffering from for the past year, I was unable to establish proper Bookkeeping practices in the outpost of Battlefailed. For that reason, preparation of proper reports in accordance to established law concerning colonization efforts can only be begun now.

After recovering, I have immediately taken over the governance of the outpost after previous "Overseer" stepped down, in my opinion, due to melancholic mood caused by some tragic romantic entanglement. Most undwarfy. What I saw when finally free of delirious fever I have been afflicted with terrified me.

Battlefailed is a bundle of total and utter chaos. While piles of corpses littering the surrounding oceanside are understandable, considering the location of the outpost, what truly struck my dwarven soul is the sorry, for the lack of proper word describing the entropy reining here, state of the interior. The layout, or rather, complete lack of it, prevents any and all attempts to carry out any proper crafting or construction work. There are stockpiles EVERYWHERE. Refuse stockpiles, food stockpiles, goods stockpiles scattered all over the way too many floors of the outpost. Someone even piled dozens of units of furniture in a space left after mining out a hematite vein. A furniture stockpile in a hematite vein. A VEIN. Zombie muskoxen on the pier leading to fishing platform. Sorry excuse of militia running around with human-made weapons, dressed in tattered rags.

Another horrifying point is the absence of organized living space. There are few mined out bedrooms, lacking any coherent design, and communal dormitory.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

This outpost has been established Five years ago. I expected something more than atrocious living conditions. However, previous rulers abused their position to establish opulent quarters for themselves.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I have immediately evicted the previous owner, wallowing in self-pity, seized the rooms and opened the statue garden to public.

Also, time has been wasted on carving out completely unnecessary... temple of some sort, because it can't be anything else. Waste of dwarfhours, if you ask me, even if it is supposedly dedicated to Lur.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

I have deemed the current carved out spaced completely unfit for further usage. I have proceeded to plan a proper fortress deeper in the earth, around the third layer of underground caverns and the magma sea situated underneath it.

After hard, but deeply satisfying work I laid out plans for new, better Battlefailed - efficient, two-layered (with expansion prospect) workshop floor/warehouse, based on patented design by Urist Doledod and connected with farm-space that will be irrigated from cavern lake, following instructions in "Irrigation and I" by Olmul Kathilul, standardized living pods, variant 3c, proper hospital and water reservoir, connected to irrigation system pump stack for efficiency. And a practical dining hall. No silliness.

Not long after I sent out designs for mining, an artifact was completed by a member of militia.

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

End of Granite brought up another sign of wastefulness and incompetence of previous designated administrator - he ordered mass slaughter of animals without providing proper storage space for meat and fat. Butchers shops were flooded with miasma. I designated emergency stockpile in nearby corridor... the place is beyond hope anyway.

A group of 20 migrants arrived in the third week of Slate. Sadly, I must conclude that they will be mostly a burden, as current outpost profile predicts gainful employment of only a small number of them. Apart from the brewer, cook, glassmaker and two crafters, they are all pretty useless in current situation... especially the two hunters. I don't know what made them think that traveling to undead-infested plains was a good idea. This migration brings about one other problem - Battlefailed exceeded population levels of an outpost, and in accordance to proper regulations concerning municipal management of communities, elections will have to be held soon.

Elven caravan braved the cursed Blueness of Malodors to trade with our community, arriving in the third week of Felsite. It gave me the opportunity to replace the previous broker with someone more competent... even I know more about appraisal, and I only took a summer course loosely connected to the topic during my studies at Mountainhomes. I ordered purchase of as much wood, barrels, and alcohol as was possible with our pitiful stocks of trade goods. I need to order some more stone goods before the next caravan.

Remaining weeks of spring were uneventful. There was no trouble with undead denizens of the plains, and the work on fortress proper is progressing smoothly. I anticipate finishing the necessary mining by the end of autumn.

End of report
Signed,
Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul, Bookmaster and temporary administrator of Battlefailed.

Edit: some typos

[Samthere]

My public statue garden looks really nice
Nice start!

[SethCreiyd]

Awesome.

If I may, a fitting punishment for Creiyd would be an assignment as head garbagedwarf.

However, I defend the use of that hematite vein.  It was empty space, and those mechanisms had to go somewhere.

[Robocorn]

After hard, but deeply satisfying work I laid out plans for new, better Battlefailed - efficient, two-layered (with expansion prospect) workshop floor/warehouse, based on patented design by Urist Doledod and connected with farm-space that will be irrigated from cavern lake, following instructions in "Irrigation and I" by Olmul Kathilul, standardized living pods, variant 3c, proper hospital and water reservoir, connected to irrigation system pump stack for efficiency. And a practical dining hall. No silliness.

Aren't there several  major obstacles in the way of this grand scheme, obstacles that involve deadly dust and noxious secretions? I'm looking forward to you fighting them because I take sadistic glee in everything that happens to Battlefailed (In the history file I'm listed as an enemy anyway).

An organized Battlefailed seems just strange enough to work, and all of those undead herds wandering the caverns will give it that homey smell we've been looking for.

[Zathel]

Aren't there several  major obstacles in the way of this grand scheme, obstacles that involve deadly dust and noxious secretions? I'm looking forward to you fighting them because I take sadistic glee in everything that happens to Battlefailed (In the history file I'm listed as an enemy anyway).

An organized Battlefailed seems just strange enough to work, and all of those undead herds wandering the caverns will give it that homey smell we've been looking for.

Any access to caverns, as of now, is sealed, I have plotted a path for the spiral staircase that winds its way completely inside the rock formations. Only breach of deepest cavern layers will occur when I will have to irrigate the farms and fill the reservoir.

Then, of course, if time allows I will set up woodcutting and mining operation in the caverns, with all the FUN that comes with it.

I wish I had more competent miners, but someone drafted them into military and they refuse to do anything else than train. Another update coming this evening, gotta scram to the library and write my thesis.

[Zathel]

Ok, here comes summer...

***

Seasonal Development Progress Report, year 506, form BRT-325, in accordance to 3rd Directive of Bureau of Colonization
Fortress name: Battlefailed
Fortress status: Town
Bookmaster: Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul

Hematite was pretty uneventful. Work on the fort proper is progressing smoothly. Citizens of Battlefailed elected Ral Athelurus mayor in elections that miraculously did not breach any regulations. I have better things to worry about than assigning him quarters befitting his rank... and if it was my choice, I'd just chuck him a standard living pod room, but it's "tradition" for the mayor to have opulent quarters. Also, Ilmoran got a fey mood. I wonder what he'll make? A statue inscribed with images of merchants getting stomped into ground by undead wildlife? At least I could make some use of that, unlike the previous creation of "inspired" dwarven mind.

In Malachite, the new Mayor, in total inconsideration for the atrocious state of the fortress, ordered construction of items from bronze. But, an order is an order, and I immediately sent out necessary forms.

As for the artifact created by Ilmoran, I wasn't far off in my predictions.

Ideal item for new barracks, if and when I will get around to designing them.

After fulfilling the request for bronze items for mayor, he immediately ordered even more bronze items, and now I have no excuse not to fulfill his request. If bronze is so important to Battlefailed, why not prohibit the export of bronze items?

Miners have been complaining about the location of future magma steelworks. Of course the stone is damp, you are mining directly beneath the lake, what did they expect, scorching sand? I have made sure that mining layout is compliant with Occupational Health and Safety regulations, they should have more faith.

Human caravan arrived in third third week of Galena. I exchanged some of our trade goods (of rather high quality, even if made from subpar material) for metal, wood and alcohol. I have also decided to finally get rid of two zombie muskoxen on the pier leading to fishing platform... some incompetent hauler tripped and dropped a bin of goods in sight of oxen and was too scared to go and retrieve it, despite the fact that there was no danger whatsoever. Not soon later a lone skeletal muskox tried to get into the fortress, but got caught by a cage trap. I have no idea whatsoever what to do with the damned thing.

Overall, summer was peaceful and productive. Apart from that one muskox, there was no trouble from undead, the halls of new fort are nearly complete, food and drink is plentiful (according to my calculations, current stocks of alcohol should last for at least another year and half, even if they were never resupplied). It is my sincere hope that autumn will be the same.

End of report
Signed,
Unib "Zathel" Ottanlimul, Bookmaster and temporary administrator of Battlefailed.

edit: typos and minor stuff again

[Oglokoog]

You portray your dwarf's (or perhaps your own?) sense of superiority rather skillfully 

[Zathel]

You portray your dwarf's (or perhaps your own?) sense of superiority rather skillfully 

I've spent past two weeks reading books about translation studies, where one smart ass bashes another smart ass (using proper academic discourse, of course) for creating stupid theory of translation, then presents his own theory, which is equally shitty and gets trashed in next publication I read. Vicious cycle, I tell ya, with no end in sight...

It might just show though in my writing.

[Oglokoog]

Yeah. Also, a minor complaint; you omit articles sometimes. It's not as annoying as "their all dead", but it's enough to make my grammar nazi sense tingle 

[Zathel]

Yeah. Also, a minor complaint; you omit articles sometimes. It's not as annoying as "their all dead", but it's enough to make my grammar nazi sense tingle 

The woes of non-native English speaker. Even though I am a student of philology, I still have problems with articles in English (I think I just internalized that part of language wrong, and now it's nigh-impossible to change), especially when I don't focus on remembering about them.

[Oglokoog]

Yeah. Also, a minor complaint; you omit articles sometimes. It's not as annoying as "their all dead", but it's enough to make my grammar nazi sense tingle 

The woes of non-native English speaker. Even though I am a student of philology, I still have problems with articles in English (I think I just internalized that part of language wrong, and now it's nigh-impossible to change), especially when I don't focus on remembering about them.

I am not a native English speaker either. Actually, I've noticed that native English speakers tend to make more mistakes in English than people for whom English is a second(ary) language. But that's neither here nor there, really.

[Urist Imiknorris]

I generally make a fair number of mistakes, but I manage to catch most of them before posting. My brain knows where the words go, but my hands do not always agree.

[heyguys]

Just checking in to say I'm still following this thread. By the way, what is the name of that visualizer? I'm thinking of using that for screenshots instead. I remember there being a 3d one too, but don't know if it has been discontinued or not.

[Robocorn]

looked like stonesense. I haven't been able to get any visualizers to work myself ( ) but they do add a bit of flair to the screenshot.

we should hope you're following, you're the next player.

[Oglokoog]

Yeah, that is stonesense. There was Visual Fortress, but it hasn't been updated for 0.31.xx versions, it only works with 0.28.