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[The Yellow Peril]

I had one so spectacularly bad that I wasn't even sure it was an artifact the first time I looked at its description. Behold:

"Titheleth Debish, The Rumor of Spasms, a perfect indigo tourmaline. This is a perfect indigo tourmaline. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of indigo tourmaline."

It happened because a Gem Cutter migrants got the strange mood. I suppose I'm lucky he picked up a gem as valuable as an indigo tourmaline - it could quite easily have been one of the ones worth 5 dwarfbucks.

[MonkeyHead]

I had one so spectacularly bad that I wasn't even sure it was an artifact the first time I looked at its description. Behold:

"Titheleth Debish, The Rumor of Spasms, a perfect indigo tourmaline. This is a perfect indigo tourmaline. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of indigo tourmaline."

It happened because a Gem Cutter migrants got the strange mood. I suppose I'm lucky he picked up a gem as valuable as an indigo tourmaline - it could quite easily have been one of the ones worth 5 dwarfbucks.

got the same made totally of green glass yesterday. only redeeming feature is i now have a legendary glassworker. this was slightly worse than the artifcat quartzite mechanism encircled with bands of leather. atleast that can be used in a noble bedroom to increase the value, and to eventually be used to kill them.

[eerr]

a stone bed covered in spikes?
sounds pretty useless and unpleasant to me

This is an artifact for a noble-dipping room.

a bauxite bed is magma immune!

[Oglokoog]

Ugoshidith Idashroldeth. "Hollowsystems the Moist Anguish". a Saguaro flute.

This is a Saguaro flute. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality.
On the item is an image of Hollowsystems the Moist Anguish the Saguaro flute
in Saguaro

A wooden flute, carved with an image of itself, worth only 2400.

Any artifact that has an image of itself on it is instantly epic. Because, you see... the image of itself ALSO has an image of itself on it, with another image of itself on that image and so on. The item becomes an endless fractal tunnel into the great dark void beyond or something. Dwarven minds are accustomed to such occurances, though. Probably.

[Bronze Dog]

Ugoshidith Idashroldeth. "Hollowsystems the Moist Anguish". a Saguaro flute.

This is a Saguaro flute. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality.
On the item is an image of Hollowsystems the Moist Anguish the Saguaro flute
in Saguaro

A wooden flute, carved with an image of itself, worth only 2400.

Any artifact that has an image of itself on it is instantly epic. Because, you see... the image of itself ALSO has an image of itself on it, with another image of itself on that image and so on. The item becomes an endless fractal tunnel into the great dark void beyond or something. Dwarven minds are accustomed to such occurances, though. Probably.

See also: Planepacked.

[Noble Digger]

I have a pre-31.11 generational fort (dwarven civilization was destroyed in worldgen, so all my population comes from reproduction of married couples) as such, I get 2-3 children with fey moods every year, and they constantly want to make "iron" figurines (out of bone, leather, etc) depicting the foundation of the fort in the year 420.

[charred_gp]

In an old fort of mine, a mason made the grandest, most awe-inspiring...door. It wasn't even all that expensive, I had prepared meals worth more.

[Organum]

Ugoshidith Idashroldeth. "Hollowsystems the Moist Anguish". a Saguaro flute.

This is a Saguaro flute. All craftdwarfship is of the highest quality.
On the item is an image of Hollowsystems the Moist Anguish the Saguaro flute
in Saguaro

A wooden flute, carved with an image of itself, worth only 2400.

Any artifact that has an image of itself on it is instantly epic. Because, you see... the image of itself ALSO has an image of itself on it, with another image of itself on that image and so on. The item becomes an endless fractal tunnel into the great dark void beyond or something. Dwarven minds are accustomed to such occurances, though. Probably.

See also: Planepacked.

About that... Why is it that everyone assumes the images of themselves are perfect? Sure, the craftdwarfship is of the highest quality, but realistically speaking the best an item like that flute would have on it is maybe one rendition of it done perfectly and then the next level would lose clarity and eventually it'd just be a line representing a flute.

Or am I just to suspend my disbelief and pretend that these dwarves are magicians of space-time?

[BrutalNoodle]

RECURSIVE CROTCH. A most horrible disease.

[Vertigon]

Or am I just to suspend my disbelief and pretend that these dwarves are magicians of space-time?

Yes.

I had one so spectacularly bad that I wasn't even sure it was an artifact the first time I looked at its description. Behold:

"Titheleth Debish, The Rumor of Spasms, a perfect indigo tourmaline. This is a perfect indigo tourmaline. All craftsdwarfship is of the highest quality. It menaces with spikes of indigo tourmaline."

It happened because a Gem Cutter migrants got the strange mood. I suppose I'm lucky he picked up a gem as valuable as an indigo tourmaline - it could quite easily have been one of the ones worth 5 dwarfbucks.

I feel your pain. Mine, though, rather than grab the precious fire opal, grabbed the 10 buck prase next to it, before I could forbid it. The artifact didn't even have spikes on it.

However, LEGENDARY GEM CUTTY.

[ikacer]

Onshendustik Gorrothruslush, "Chantboars the Disemboweled Splash", a horse bone scepter:

"This is a horse bone scepter. All craftsmanship is of the highest quality."

Value: 1200

[Xionis]

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

[/URL]

Ya....

The combination of the name...the item itself and the fact that it's got siltstone on it also..................

[Oglokoog]

I think it needs to menace with some spikes.

[Chattox]

I had a cloth trumpet once, how does that even work?

[Organum]

I had a cloth trumpet once, how does that even work?

dwarves are magicians of space-time

I'm learning.