Print

Please login or register.
1 Hour 1 Day 1 Week 1 Month Forever
Login with username, password and session length

[Bandages]

Gentlemen.

I offer you the unfinished tale of Slibtu Pepperpick, the Lean Spurn of Assembling. What started as a pipe-dream of an uber-wrestler roaming the wilderness exploding wolves turned into so much more several minutes after his conception. Immediately after leaving his hometown, he found a family of groundhogs scurrying about.

"INSOLENT CREATURES. I AM LIBTU PEPPERPICK. PREPARE TO DIE."

After punching them for 20 minutes, they were still alive. Bruised and comatose, yes. But dead? no. Wrestling suddenly became wimpy and pathetic. So instead, Slibtu picked up a groundhog in each hand and set off for bigger prey. It wasn't long before a pack of wolves appeared before Pepperpick. He was prepared.

After running through trees and around ponds, he had caused the wolves to split up. Everything was going according to plan when a wolf charged him and bit into his hand. Child’s play. Pepperpick shoved the groundhog through the wolf’s skull, ending it’s pathetic life instantly. He dropped the groundhogs and picked up the wolf and used it to beat every other of his lupine nemesis to death. He grabbed another wolf corpse and set off on his new life mission.

Slibtu Pepperpick was going to do the impossible. He was going to dual-wield the corpse of his slain foes, and replace them with larger and more powerful enemies as they fall to him. Our tale currently has Pepperpick holding a rigor-mortified sasquatch in each of his kung-fu grips.

The world will tremble. Slibtu Pepperpick will. Wield. Every. LAST. BEAAAAST.

[Eric Blank]

I really feel bad for the guy when he realizes he can barely drag his feet across the scorched deserts with a nearly un-swing-able minotaur corpse in each hand.

though the prospect of beating elves to death with their children's already battered corpses is also irresistible 
makes you wish you could do it while they're alive.

[Coidzure Dreams]

I approve of someone getting this man some fanart stat!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

in the meantime, a placeholder

[Pkassad]

I walk around with a hydra corpse weighing 8.5k and a Exceptional Adamantine shield in the other.  It knocks humans 1-2 squares, and I have seen it knock some children a total of 12.  I get max seed of 1992 yay armor user.  Sadly my 15k groundhog lawmaker I could not carry it would bring me to 400 speed, 180ish if I was holding both the hydra and this one.  Anyways, corpses and bolts/arrows make the most fun melee weapons

[piecewise]

I walk around with a hydra corpse weighing 8.5k and a Exceptional Adamantine shield in the other.  It knocks humans 1-2 squares, and I have seen it knock some children a total of 12.  I get max seed of 1992 yay armor user.  Sadly my 15k groundhog lawmaker I could not carry it would bring me to 400 speed, 180ish if I was holding both the hydra and this one.  Anyways, corpses and bolts/arrows make the most fun melee weapons

what you need to do is find an iron man or other mineral based creature (after they stop being immortal) and bash things with them. So what if your move speed is 200, you're hitting someone with 1250 k of solid iron.

[Dante]

Awesome. Are bronze colossuses killable yet? If so...

[Village_Idiot]

Awesome. Are bronze colossuses killable yet? If so...

Unfortunatly only by melting them.

[Vester]

I'm pretty sure you can kill them via bisection.

Which is impossible via normal means.

So... uh... good luck.

[LordSlowpoke]

I'm pretty sure you can kill them via bisection.

Which is impossible via normal means.

So... uh... good luck.

You need to swing another bronze colossus at them.

I'm waiting for the moment when tweak can actually *create* bronze colossus corpses. Oh the fun. Oh the joy. Oh the +bronze colossus roast+.

[Bandages]

An update on Slibtu:

After travelling into the very depths of the world, and picking up a pair of blind cave ogre corpses, Slibtu was killed topside by an arrow to the chest causing him to bleed out.

Perhaps some day, another young adventurer will go to his resting place, and take Pepperpick's body up as his own weapon.

[Pickled Tink]

Inspired by this thread I created a human adventurer who strangled a rhesus macaque, beat a cougar to death with it, beat a sasquatch to death with that, beat an elf peasant to death with that, beat an elf adept to death with the dead elf peasant, beat an elf druid to death with the adept, beat an elf princess to death with the druid, beat the elf queen to death with the princess, and then beat a chinchilla demon to death with the elf queen, and then half the goblin fortress to death with her. a ~12,000kg demon carcass is a bit much to belt people with. You get much better results with elven nobility (I tried the demon, but you get too slow and they beat the snot out of you between your actions).

This experiment has demonstrated that at long last there is something nobles are good for! (Now that we have the misc item user skill)

I was then slain by a scratch to the head with a copper bolt that caused me to bleed out.

[CrossBolt]

You can kill iron men by knocking them off massive cliffs because they pretty much lose all their limbs when they hit the ground, you could probably do it with a bronze collosi

[Shade-o]

Hopefully at some point we can control regular creatures like we can vermin, and use living creatures as weapons, instead of waiting for them to die.

[denito]

You can kill iron men by knocking them off massive cliffs because they pretty much lose all their limbs when they hit the ground, you could probably do it with a bronze collosi

Yep, even 1-Z level falls damage bronze colossi's limbs.

I fought a bronze colossus on a mountain with a flat top (reminded me of the level from Mario 64 where you fight the giant bomb-omb).  We both had high dodge skill and a series of dodges took us close to the edge of the platform without anyone hurting the other.  Then the colossus dodged off the edge and landed 1-Z level down, and it broke some limbs, because he couldn't stand anymore.  I thought, "ah, I have you now!" but, stupidly, instead of going down a ramp to fight him on his own level, I stood on the level above and attacked him.  Eventually I too dodged off the edge of the mountain.  The landing stunned me and the bronze colossus took that opportunity to smack down so hard on the top of my head I'd have had to unzip my pants to blow my nose.

[Village_Idiot]

You can stun and damage the bronze colossus, but when all it's body is cut of/broken it will still be alive and can still kill you.